Fandom: Heroes
Title: Misery Loves Company
Author: Paynesgrey
Rating: G
Genre: General/Introspective
Word Count: 2,208
Characters/Pairings: Emma, Peter, Samuel [Emma/Peter, Emma/Samuel implied]
Spoilers: Season 4, "Upon This Rock/Let it Bleed"
Notes: Written for One-shot Challenge #20 at
heroes_contest Summary: Emma has conflicting thoughts about her relationship with Peter and Samuel's offer.
Emma sniffles, and she blinks twice before trying to focus her thoughts. She can’t dwell on it anymore. She’s been rejected from medical school, and though she knows she can apply again, she wonders if it’s worth it.
Yet, she has a chance to be a doctor somewhere else. Samuel’s offer is more than appealing, and though she did somewhat agree to his offer, she feels there’s something off about the mysterious man.
He shows her that her power has beauty. Emma shudders - her power also has a side that frightens her. Can she really do that? Can she draw people in like a Siren from the music of her gift?
She wipes the tears from her eyes and looks at her computer screen, frowning at the full inbox of emails. She can’t think of work right now. She has to think of the next step. The idea of packing up her things and opening up the compass appeals to her more than this, and suddenly, Emma starts to feel guilty.
She sees a flash of color in her eye, and she turns to Peter standing next to her desk.
“Busted,” she reads from his lips, and he points to another tear that rolled down her cheek. “Are you okay?” he asks slowly.
She wipes the tear away quickly, but she can’t divert her eyes from him. She laughs a little. “I hate being obvious.”
Peter looks at her, and she can’t help but admire his attractiveness. More than anything, she knows she’s drawn to the sad yet compassionate nature inside his eyes.
“I didn’t make medical school,” she confesses, and he leans forward and frowns. She reads ‘sorry’ from his lips, and he pulls up a chair and sits with her, staying with her and lending her a compassionate shoulder.
Emma isn’t sure if she wants to tell him anything else - about Samuel or about her gift. She admits to herself; she’s afraid.
“Then we’re both having a bad week,” Peter says. She watches him curiously, and then a thought dawns on her. She’s seen the news. She quickly remembers that he left work for his brother’s funeral.
“I’m sorry about your brother,” she says and signs, and immediately pain flashes over his face. It’s still in his eyes, and Emma guesses it won’t go away any time soon.
“Thank you,” Peter says, and his eyes drop to his hands. For a long moment Emma watches him say nothing, and Emma wishes he could see the colors again - so they could share something and distract them from their misery, to be happy again for one more time.
“Hey,” he says, gaining her attention. “Would you like to have lunch with me?”
Emma leans back in her chair, and she smiles, slightly embarrassed by Peter’s offer. He watches her anxiously and awaits a response. Slowly, she nods, and he stands up from the chair and returns it while she gets her things. They bustle down the hospital corridors and out the front door as Peter walks by her side.
“Where are we going?” she asks, realizing she blindly follows him down the street as they head into an area full of restaurants and retail stores.
“Here,” he says, pointing at a small bistro. Peter opens the door as Emma slips inside, and he follows behind her as they order. The owner recognizes Peter, and Emma watches their interaction curiously, reading their words and feeling the familiarity of the two men. The owner gives Peter his condolences, and Emma sees the pain again in Peter’s face, slowly disappearing as he comes back to her. Then, his expression brightens, and she can see something beyond his compassion and mourning.
His desire. Peter is as lonely as she is, and it scares her how much she identifies with him. She knows lightly he’s pressed for something more intimate, and awkwardly she’s shied away.
She can’t explain her reasons. Peter is a perfectly normal and wonderful guy, and he’s patient and kind about her ability. But he just lost his brother, and Emma feels like she’s at a forked road in her life - with Medical School and her new abilities. She doesn’t know if she has room to add Peter to her list of the changes in her life.
“Something wrong again?” he asks her, and she’s awed by how well he picks up on people’s emotions. She guesses this is part of his powers - or it could be just him.
“No, I was just…” She stops and shakes her head, changing the subject. “How are you doing?”
She watches as Peter takes a deep sigh, and his face contorts in pain. “Not good, but I’m dealing with it. My niece is been a real life saver.”
“Your niece?” Emma asks, curious when he brings up his family. She sees him smile genuinely, indicating their closeness.
“She’s a lot stronger than me. Like Nathan was. She’s been kicking my ass to accept reality,” he says with a light smile.
“That’s good. You need someone like that,” Emma says. “I never had that when…” She pauses and frowns. “When my nephew passed.”
“I’m sorry,” Peter says sympathetically, and Emma shakes her head to wave him off.
“It’s okay,” she says. “Things are better now.” She smiles brightly, but she doesn’t completely feel it. She can tell by Peter’s gaze that he picks up on it too. She sighs. “I don’t sound convincing, do I?”
“Not one bit,” he says, resting his chin on his hands. He stares at her, and she lets him. She can’t look away either. She doesn’t want to miss his words, and strangely enough, a part of her wants to see the desire for her within his expression again.
“I’ve been thinking,” Emma says, and she wonders if she has the courage to make this offer. She can feel her hands tremble when she makes the signs. “Would you like to have lunch more often?”
She almost stops herself, but she can’t help it. Emma doesn’t even know, once she’s taken off for the carnival, if she’ll even be around. She just tells herself she’ll let Peter’s answer decide her fate.
He blinks at her, surprised by her offer. Has she really brushed him off that much? She admits she’s not really good at this. No one has been remotely interested in her in a long time, and when anyone is, they can’t seem to get past her disability. Emma knows Peter is different though, and she guesses this is why she’s scared.
If she lets him in, he may be around more permanently, and then out of this strange yet harmonious bond of mutual loneliness, something more could happen between them.
Well, Emma thinks, at least she wouldn’t be so alone.
“I’d like that,” Peter finally answers, and Emma realizes he’s been watching her the whole time. His gaze makes her feel both uncomfortable and allured.
She tilts her head and suddenly she realizes something. She doesn’t feel so scared. Not really, and not anymore about Peter. In fact, having him around decreases her social anxiety about the rest of the world.
Maybe Peter can make her feel better about going out of her comfort zone - even help her in her decision to revisit Samuel’s offer.
“How do you feel about carnivals?” Emma asks. Peter’s brow knits together quickly, and then she catches his lips stretch in a half-smile.
“They’re okay, I guess. Why?” He takes a sip of her drink, and Emma notices her own uneaten food. She pushes her thoughts aside and answers him.
“I’ve been invited to go to one.” She puts her hands under her table as they start to tremble, and she’s glad she’s confident enough with Peter where she doesn’t have to sign. “Could you please come with me?”
Peter’s watching her suspiciously, and she wonders if he knows about Samuel and about the whole carnival. His eyes seem darker, and the muscles in his face tense as he locks his jaw. He puts his drink down and nods once. “Of course.”
His change in behavior immediately worries her. Sure, he seems protective, but he also seems suspicious, and Emma is sure it’s not because he thinks it’s a regular carnival. Perhaps he knows it’s not. She feels a coldness wash over her, and her body stiffens in her chair. She pokes at her salad with her fork and takes a small bite.
She starts to think asking him is a bad idea. She doesn’t know what it is, but suddenly she feels something different about Peter. He continues to stare at her, making her feel more naked with every minute. Is it so odd she’d ask him out?
“You don’t have to,” she says quietly. His brow furrows again. “Just forget it.”
“Emma…” he starts to say, and she waves a hand at him. She laughs nervously.
“It’s silly,” she says, shrugging it off as best she as she can.
When he grabs her hand, she freezes and feels offended. She meets his eyes sternly, but she settles down as his eyes no longer seem as dark as they were. Something’s still wrong, but it’s obvious he’s trying very hard to stay in her good graces.
“I said I would go, so what’s wrong?” Peter asks with a forced smile. She almost doesn’t notice his desperation to keep her attention, but Emma has had many years of practice of accurately reading people. Peter is no different; he’s as obvious as everyone else.
“Nothing,” she plays it off, and gives him a forced smile of her own. “Thank you,” she says meekly, and they continue to eat the rest of their lunch. For the rest of their time in the bistro, Peter doesn’t bring up the carnival, and Emma lets him drone on about other things like work and stories about his niece.
When they return to the hospital, Peter says goodbye, and he asks her to call him whenever she wants to go to the carnival. Emma nods, but she’s having second thoughts. She only hopes Peter doesn’t catch on to her suspicions.
At her desk, she starts to feel bored again. She goes through her email, she files charts, and she hands out forms to doctors, RNs, and EMTs when they approach her desk. Her mother strolls by and wants to catch up, but Emma can’t help be short with her, assuring her she’s fine about the rejection letter, and that she’ll try again.
Like Peter, her mother doesn’t even know that she may not have to apply back to medical school. Ever since lunch, Emma has been thinking more and more about Samuel’s offer, and she can’t ignore the gut feeling that maybe the carnival barker is right.
She has this ability that frightens her, and she doesn’t know how to use it, or how to control it properly. It scares her that it can be so much more than a power where she sees sounds in color. Then, there’s the temptation of being a doctor again - that it may come easier to her than if she waits to go to medical school. Both ideas entice her, and the rest of her work day is filled with thoughts that bring her closer to that final decision.
Peter’s not around when she’s ready to leave her shift, and she looks around for him when she puts on her coat. Disappointed he’s left without saying goodbye, Emma sighs lightly and prepares to leave. Her computer shuts down, and she digs into her pockets for her gloves. Inside her right pocket, she feels the compass Samuel gives her and she pauses, clutching the object against her palm.
She keeps it in her hand as she walks outside toward her apartment. Emma stops when she arrives at her building, and she pulls out the compass excitedly. It spins wildly in her hand before pointing northwest. She turns her body toward that direction and wonders if she should leave tonight.
Then she makes a decision.
Turning back toward the front entrance, Emma prepares to go into her place and pack some things. Before she takes a step inside, she sees a shadow to her left. She steps back, surprised, as Samuel steps out into the light. She meets his eyes, and she notices his charming smile - waiting for her next word.
“Emma,” he says with a hopeful expression.
She nods and looks down at the compass in her hands before meeting his eyes again. “I’m coming.” He looks delighted and approaches her as she leans against the railing of the steps. She studies his tanned face, weathered yet handsome. His eyes are fascinating, and his demeanor is calm and inviting - like having an aura of a wise man. However, Emma does not miss the mystery that surrounds him, fueled by unbridled ambition and freedom.
“Give me a chance to get ready.” She sees him give her a curt bow, his eyes never breaking from hers. Emma turns around, both nervous and thrilled. She steps into her building swiftly, and she feels a strange, adventurous feeling swell in her chest.
She’s motivated even more knowing that Samuel’s downstairs - waiting for her.
END