Do you read obituaries and feel jealous of the dead?
Have you ever thought you knew something, and then all of a sudden realized that everything you knew was probably wrong?
I realized that I've been snappish at people for things that I do myself. Maybe I just need to stop trying to help. I don't think I know as much as I think I do. Maybe my parents are right.
I just... it all hurts too much. I don't want to do this. I don't want to be That Person. I don't know if I want to be any person right now.
I know I need help, but at the moment, I think I need to know that there'll be something for me out the other end other than a nebulous 'life will be better'. I need Reasons. I've been told too long that I'm only as useful as I can be to others. I can't live with a nebulous 'life is worth living'. I need something. I need something tangible, and I haven't really gotten anything tangible in months.
Disappearing sounds better and better.
I realized that I've been snappish at people for things that I do myself. Maybe I just need to stop trying to help. I don't think I know as much as I think I do. Maybe my parents are right.
I just... it all hurts too much. I don't want to do this. I don't want to be That Person. I don't know if I want to be any person right now.
I know I need help, but at the moment, I think I need to know that there'll be something for me out the other end other than a nebulous 'life will be better'. I need Reasons. I've been told too long that I'm only as useful as I can be to others. I can't live with a nebulous 'life is worth living'. I need something. I need something tangible, and I haven't really gotten anything tangible in months.
Disappearing sounds better and better.