Brightly Burning (Hikago, Part 6)
Aishuu Offers:
Brightly Burning
A Hikaru no Go Alternate Universe
Disclaimers: Hotta and Obata. Shonen Jump. Not Mine.
Note: lady_addiction has written two nice sides. They're on her LJ... Kudos for her the input on this chapter.
By the time the pro exams started, it was an accepted fact that there would only be two spots up for grabs. The third had already been staked out by Shindou Hikaru.
Since the Young Lions Tournament, the insei class had been graced with the presence of pros ranging from one-dan all the way through seventh. Most of them sought games with Shindou, but Shinoda wouldn't permit it, to the frustration of everyone involved.
"I don't think this is the appropriate time," he would say, before directing the hapless pro over to an insei who could use the practice. Most of the pros had been taught by Shinoda as insei, and didn't quite dare to protest.
Waya had been amused and irritated. With all the focus on Shindou, it was hard not to feel lost in the shuffle. His own sensei, Morishita, had gotten into the habit of asking Shindou for a second opinion, treating him more like a peer than a pupil. Had Shindou not been as oblivious as he was to the special respect accorded him, it would have made him universally detested by the insei. Instead, a sort of exasperated affection was shown to him as the insei tried to protect him from his own ignorance.
One pro who was conspicuous through his absence was Touya Akira. After a rather shocking article in Weekly Go - and Waya suspected Amano had been tactful and used the less incendiary quotes from Shindou - most people would have expected him to show up and challenge Shindou to put him in his place. Touya wasn't known for having a temper, but anyone would have been offended at the way Shindou had brushed him off.
He didn't show. Waya speculated about that with Honda, Nase and Iijima during a lunch break. Shindou had wandered off to parts unknown, making it convenient.
"Maybe he really didn't notice," Nase said, shrugging a bit. "He could have dismissed Shindou as a pretentious upstart."
"He is a pretentious upstart, but that doesn't make him less of a threat," Iijima said. "I don't think Touya is the type to get overconfident. He recognized Shindou as a rival."
Waya agreed. He had seen that look of stunned surprise in Touya's eyes after the game. "Maybe he's trying to be, you know, subtle? He still has a few months before Shindou enters the pro leagues."
"So he's waiting for an official match?" Honda asked.
"Maybe." Iijima folded his hands in his lap. "He does like tradition."
"Maybe he just doesn't care," Nase suggested.
Waya hardly saw that as a possibility, but the suggestions grew more and more outlandish as they continued their meal. He knew, as anyone who had a true desire to play Go would, that Touya's competitive spirit must have been stirred by the threat of the unknown. The game could have gone either way, and the next one might end in a loss for Touya.
Shindou was annoyed by the whole mess. He was under tremendous pressure and scrutiny, and once Waya almost beat him when he had made a mistake early in the game, distracted by a small "discussion" two pros who had been watching were having. They were ridiculing Shindou's opening joseki which had fallen out of fashion in the 30's as plain stupid. Shindou had been so annoyed he hadn't used a large enough keima, turning what would have been a slaughter into a close game.
Shindou had not been happy about playing through yose. He won, he always did, but the two moku victory was far below his usual standard. He was still weak in yose, so it might even have been beneficial for him, but Shindou hated playing poorly. Waya watched him try to calm himself as the pros started in on an after-game discussion.
"Let's go do something," Waya said, trying to divert Shindou from his annoyance.
Shindou perked right up, ignoring the two pros who were rambling about his comeback. "Oh? Do you know a new salon? I was thinking about going back to Dougenzaka and playing Kawai-san that game I promised him, but I'm not in the mood to argue with him today." He sent a dark look at their company.
"No... I mean, do something totally unrelated to Go. Watch a movie and grab some sushi." It had been a while since Waya had just hung out, and he could feel the need for a tension relieving night.
Shindou stared at Waya. "You know how to do things that don't involve Go?" His expression was completely dumbstruck.
This was one of those moments that Waya wondered if Shindou really was that stupid. The genuine curiosity wasn't mocking, just confused. "Shindou, do you honestly believe we eat, sleep and dream Go?" he asked in exasperation.
"I do," Shindou said, his tone utterly serious.
Waya tried to recall. The times they'd hung out before, they'd always talked about Go, or went places after going to Go salons first. Shindou would occasionally mention musical artists or his favorite baseball team when prompted, but he would act almost disinterested. Waya had always thought of Shindou as being more normal than most insei, but it was becoming clear that Shindou was slowly distancing himself from pop culture. "Shindou, don't you have a life? Go is great, but there's times when you have to move away from the goban!"
"No matter how hard or long I study, I will never know everything about Go. I don't have time to waste," Shindou said. "I want the hand of god."
"Shindou..." Waya said softly, unable to think of anything to say. He loved Go, but Shindou was obsessed. He didn't think it was healthy, but a small part of him was envious that the other was able to possess so much devotion.
Shindou shifted a bit on his feet, apparently sensing he'd done something wrong. "Did you have something you wanted to do?" he asked hastily. "It's probably a good idea to let our brains idle."
Waya saw the implied apology. "Sushi! And there's a new fun park that just opened that I've been meaning to try out. I haven't been on a roller coaster in months."
Shindou checked his wallet before agreeing. "Might be fun," he said, before calling his mother and letting her know he was going to be late.
The evening was worth it, Waya found out. Shindou seemed to relax, and his laughter was lighter and more frequent. They ate too much at the restaurant they stopped in first, and Shindou spilled a bit of soy sauce on his sleeve. Annoyed, he shed his sweatshirt, tying it around his waist. Beneath it he wore a brilliant yellow T-shirt that proclaimed his devotion to soccer in a fanciful font.
"Nice shirt," Waya commented dryly. The Eat My Cleats, Loser shirt hardly fit in with the image of a Go player.
Shindou glanced down to see what he was wearing. "Ah, yeah. It's an old one." He fingered the fabric idly. It was just a bit worn around the cuffs.
"Were you any good?"
"Huh?"
"Soccer. Were you any good?"
Shindou frowned slightly. "You've been talking to Akari, haven't you?"
It wasn't a secret that Waya was dating Shindou's best friend. Shindou had found it amusing and traumatizing at the same time, cracking jokes about being the best man and godfather to their first child. Waya had, as was characteristic, blushed, stammered and lost his temper. He did like Akari, and she was a sweet girl, but he was only sixteen. After threatening to choke Shindou using a goban and a bit of tape, Shindou had backed off somewhat.
"Um, a little."
"Don't you have better things to be talking about?" he asked. "Like names for your future children?"
Waya gritted his teeth before taking a deep breath. "Shindou, if you continue to be a jerk, we won't be naming any for you."
Shindou blinked, then laughed. "Like I'd want any of your children named after me! They'd look like you!" he said, before taking off down the street at a steady jog.
Shindou was in better shape then Waya, but the older insei managed to keep pace until they reached the train station. From there, they went to the amusement park.
Waya noted that Shindou preferred the scarier rides, the ones that made adrenaline pump as people were suspended 100 feet in the air. The faster the ride, the more Shindou enjoyed it, dragging Waya after him in a flurry of enthusiasm. Waya regretted the sushi they'd eaten after the third time on the roller coaster, but Shindou was practically shaking with unspent energy. It was like a dam had broken, and he couldn't hold still.
It was getting late, and Shindou was happily stuffing his face with cotton candy, something that made Waya groan a bit to himself. The last thing Shindou needed was a sugar buzz.
"This was fun," Shindou said as they finally left the park. His stuck his hands in his empty jeans pocket, slouching slightly as they walked back. Shindou had horrible posture. He could barely sit in seiza for an hour, Waya knew. He was always complaining about his feet falling asleep.
"It was, wasn't it?" Waya was toying with a good luck charm he had purchased, flipping it over and over in his right hand. Shindou had said he didn't need one. He looked up at the sky, wishing he could see the stars.
They were quiet as they arrived at the station. "Do you want to hang out during the prelims?" he asked.
"I... no, I can't." Shindou looked a bit uncomfortable. "I have some studying I need to be doing, and I want to finish my summer homework."
Waya nodded, understanding. Shindou may have enjoyed the night off, but he wasn't about to relax his endless pursuit of perfection. Shindou had made his choice about what was more important to him.
"See you, then."
"Right." Shindou offered a bit of a wave, and then took off.
The next time they met, they would be rivals.
On the first day of exams, Akari stopped by the Shindou residence. In her hands she cradled a bento, wrapped in a cheerful yellow cloth. It had been a while since she'd visited
Shindou Mitsuko was always happy to see the girl. She was so cheerful, a distinct difference from the moody Hikaru. She knew teenagers were supposed to change, but she missed her son's cheerful personality. She overcompensated on her welcome whenever she saw Akari because she wished she could return Hikaru to the smiling boy who had frustrated her.
"Ah, Akari-chan! Did you come to see Hikaru off?"
Akari nodded, her ponytails bouncing against her shoulders. "Yes... did he leave already?" she asked, trying to hide the disappointment in her voice. There was only about thirty minutes until the train left, but she had figured Hikaru would keep his usual cut-it-too-damned-close schedule.
"No, he's still getting ready," Mitsuko said with annoyance. "He overslept, and I had to drag him out of bed." She turned toward the stairs. "Hikaru! You're going to be late!" she yelled.
"I'm coming already!" was the reply that echoed from the stairs. "Hold on, would you?" Hikaru sounded irritated. There was a loud "thump!," probably the sound of Hikaru falling out of bed. Akari hid a giggle in her hand. It was nice to know some things didn't change.
Mitsuko winked at Akari. "Want to go get him for me?"
Once she would have bolted up the stairs and into his room without a second thought, but now that she was older, the idea brought a flush to life on her cheeks. She hadn't realized the differences between boys and girls when she was younger; Hikaru had merely been her best friend. "I'll wait," she said, wishing she wasn't so fair. She had to resemble a tomato at the moment.
Hikaru's mother smiled gently. "I was teasing. If he isn't down here in three minutes, I'll get him," she raised her voice so it carried up to Hikaru's room threateningly.
"Geez!" Hikaru shouted. "Be patient!"
Another "thump-thump!" and the sound of muffled cursing made Mitsuko shake her head. "Oh, Hikaru..." she sighed, more to herself than Akari. A smile of fond exasperation crossed her face. "Be right back, I need to get him some toast to eat while he'd running," she told Akari.
Akari waited a bit awkwardly. This home had once been as familiar as her own, but now her eyes fixated on the little changes made since she'd last come over. There were new cushions on the couch, and the wall clock had gained a crack. A new stain seemed to have appeared in the corner of the carpet, and flowers were in a vase she'd never seen before. They were small things, but enough to make her realize that time had moved on.
A "bam!" from a door signaled that Hikaru was out of his room, and then the thudding of his feet came. He appeared on the top of the stairs, taking the stairs three at a time at a speed that made Akari wonder if he was trying to break his neck. "Mom, I-" He nearly tripped as he skidded to a stop on seeing Akari, his forward momentum abruptly arrested. "Akari?"
She held the lunch out in front of herself like a peace offering. "I wanted to bring you lunch and walk you to the station."
"Did you make it?" he asked suspiciously as he started down the stairs at a more sedate pace.
"Yes," she answered in a 'don't you dare say anything about it' tone.
"Thanks," Hikaru said nervously, running a hand to smooth his hair. There were plenty of fly-away strands, which made Akari frown.
"Did you brush your hair?" she asked, juggling the lunch back and forth.
"No time!" He started to head for his shoes.
Akari rolled her eyes, set her package down on the hallway table, and rummaged through her bag. "It'll take thirty seconds!" she announced, practically pouncing on him with a comb. Hikaru yelped, and playfully tried to fend her off, but she ended up winning anyway, cornering him. "Just hold still!" she told him.
The light-hearted struggle set them both off laughing as she arranged his hair into a more neat coiffure. His hair was a bit dry from the constant bleaching of his bangs but still slid through the comb easily. Once she snagged a tangle, and he gave an exaggerated yelp of pain.
"Be quiet, you big baby! Take it like a man!" She tugged a piece of the undyed part.
He muttered something about her not knowing what men were like, tagged with a few epithets which would have earned him a mouthful of soap had his mother heard. Akari merely made a show of arranging the last piece neatly, before backing off. She had been laughing so hard that her sides were sore.
Mitsuko came back, a brilliant smile on her face. "It sounds like you're having fun," she noted.
"If you call being attacked by a lunatic fun," Hikaru griped, before brightening on seeing his mother holding a cup of juice and a slice of toast. "For me?" He practically yanked them out of her hands instead of waiting for a reply.
"I wonder why I bother when you're so rude," Mitsuko teased.
"Because you love me!" Hikaru announced, grinning a bit. Akari watched his Adam's apple bob up and down as he chugged the juice down in three long gulps, and then he handed the glass back to his mother. "Sankyou!" he slurred as he started to munch on his breakfast.
Mitsuko merely shook her head in mock disappointment. "I spend fifteen years trying to teach you manners, and this is what I get?"
He flashed her a "V" with his free hand, then shoved his feet into his shoes. "You know you love me!" he said cheerfully.
"Only on odd days of the month." Mitsuko was practically glowing as her son laughed at her. She looked over at the clock, and a bit of her light dimmed. "It's getting late," she said softly. "You should get going. When will you be home?"
"Probably not till after six. Don't wait for me for dinner."
"I'll keep something warm for you," she said, her voice softer. "Good luck." Then she nodded to Akari, and took the cup back to the kitchen.
Akari felt awkward. Hikaru sounded like a salaryman, so adult that it made her feel childish. She picked up the lunch again and held it out. "Hikaru?"
He shoved the last piece of toast in his mouth, chewing and swallowing quickly. "Thank, Akari." His fingers brushed hers as he claimed the food. "Did you want to walk with me?" he asked after a long moment of awkward silence.
She smiled at him, relieved that she was being offered a chance. "I would love to!"
He opened the door and motioned for her to proceed him. "Let's leave, then? I'm off!" he called behind him.
Hikaru set a brisk pace, walking faster than most people would have felt comfortable. Akari nearly had to jog to keep up, and couldn't find enough breath to start a conversation. It had been like this when they were younger, though. Hikaru had always been in such a hurry to get places - usually because he was behind schedule - that walking with him had turned into exercise.
Her breathing was heavy as they finally made it to the station. Hikaru didn't comment on the way she leaned forward as she tried to slow her body down. She could hear her heartbeat in her ears.
"Huh. We're early," he said idly.
"Only you would call five minutes early," she said. "Most people would be running for their trains."
"They always leave late," Hikaru said with the expertise of the experienced.
She tried to find something to say, and was surprised at the words that popped out of her mouth. "Hikaru, when you're done with the exam, do you think we could play a game?"
Hikaru blinked with surprise, then sniffed as he tilted his nose up slightly. "You're a hundred years too early to play me," he told her condescendingly. "Even if you placed 20 stones, I'd still slaughter you."
She stomped her foot angrily. "Hikaru!" She knew he was very good, but she was trying and wasn't that what counted?
The smile that broke across his face was the happiest she'd seen him in a while. "Just kidding. Maybe next week sometime?" he offered, light dancing in his eyes.
She thought on her schedule quickly. She had been planning on taking a trip to Shibuya to do some shopping with her girlfriends, but she could probably clear Thursday. Having the chance to spend time with Hikaru would be worth more.
"Thursday?"
He shook his head. "I'll be playing another exam game. Maybe some other time?"
"My family is going to the hot springs until Wednesday, and Friday I have to meet with Haruna-chan to discuss class activities."
"We'll find some time eventually," he said. There was a muffled announcement Akari didn't quite catch, but it was apparently enough for Hikaru. "There's my train."
She nodded, choking up.
"Aren't you going to wish me good luck?" he asked.
She knew he was teasing; he'd told her numerous times he didn't believe in luck, only himself. It had become a joke between them - she would wish him luck, he would same something pithy, and then she'd smack him.
This time, her voice wouldn't rise to the occasion. She stared at him stupidly, her lips slightly parted as her throat closed up, unable to fulfil their usual ritual.
Hikaru seemed to understand, because his expression softened. He ignored the crowd around them, wrapping his arms around her waist as he drew her close for a hug. "I'm sorry, Akari," he whispered into her hair. "I'm sorry."
She clung to him, but the speakers repeated their calls for passengers of the 9:20 terminating in Ichigaya Station. Then he pulled away, and he tapped her nose playfully. "Study hard, okay?"
Akari nodded, but still couldn't speak. He smiled at her a bit sadly again, then turned to walk into the crowd. As she watched the back of his head, she wrapped her arms around herself reassuringly. "Good luck," she said, too late for him to hear.
She decided to ignore the tears falling down her cheeks. Maybe if she pretended they didn't exist, they would go away. Hikaru was disappearing before her very eyes, and there was nothing she could do about it.
She knew she was losing her best friend.
Iijima Ryou was a good Go player, a touch bogged down by technicalities, but still solid. His game lacked imagination, he knew, but he understood Go better than almost anyone. His ability to predict who would win in any match had earned him numerous pools among the insei. To him, Go was something which could be predicted like the course of the stars.
If there was one person he hated playing, it was Shindou Hikaru. The only thing that was predictable about Shindou was that he would invariably win. He played with a strong, cunning style, making moves which seemed suicidal, but which actually were the sign of an innovative mind. With the exception of his loss to Touya Akira, he'd maintained a perfect record. It wasn't just impressive, it was unheard of. Shindou had to be some kind of monster.
Like usual, Shindou managed to cut it close, showing up for the exams less than five minutes before they started. The storm boomed melodramatically outside as Shindou shook his head, trying to get rid of the stray droplets of water that he'd collected. His expression was extremely put-upon as he swore softly under his breath.
"Shindou's on time!" Waya feigned having a heart attack, dropping to his knees melodramatically. Honda just rolled his eyes, while Nase snickered.
"Laugh it up," Shindou said grouchily. "The bus driver almost forgot my stop."
"Ouch," Waya said. "That's your kind of luck, isn't it?"
"If I stood in a crowd in the middle of a field on a perfectly sunny day, lightning would still find me," Shindou grouched. Nase tutted at him while Waya pretended to play the violin, mocking him.
"Least your luck in Go isn't like that," Honda murmured, sounding a bit envious. This was his last pro exam before graduation, like Iijima. No matter what happened, neither would be returning to the insei. Iijima hadn't decided yet if he was going to give up the game, but the pressure from his parents was intense.
"Luck has little to do with Go," Shindou replied, his voice sharper than was polite. "Go is a game of skill."
"Luck can be a skill," Fukui said. Fukui depended heavily on changes of fortune to effect his wins.
"We make our own luck," Shindou said. "We take the abilities we have and use them. Sometimes there's things we can't avoid, but we do what we can." He glanced around the room, and stiffened a bit. "Are those the outsider people you told me about?" Shindou asked curiously. He pointedly looked over to a group comprised of primarily men in their twenties. The men stared back a bit hostilely, and one, noting Shindou's blond hair, murmured something to another. Within moments, the whole group was studying at Shindou.
"Why are they staring at me like that?" he asked, sounding a bit annoyed. He grabbed Waya's shoulder and stepped behind him.
"Weekly Go? A certain player saying he was going to beat Touya-meijin? Ring any bells?"
"I didn't say that! I said I wanted to play him!" Shindou protested.
"After giving Touya Akira one of the closest games of his career?" Nase patted him on the shoulder. "You poor, clueless child," she said consoling before ruffling his hair.
Their babble was annoying and set Iijima on edge. He tried to calm his breathing and find his center.
Shindou stuck his tongue out. "I can't help it if I'm gifted!"
His protest just rubbed in the differences. Waya grabbed him around the neck, forcibly ruffling his hair. "Stop being so arrogant!" he said, his teeth flashing in a fearsome grin.
Iijima felt the tension that was like a stretched rubber band through the room. Fukui, Nase, Waya, Honda, himself - all of them had a lot to lose. Shindou wouldn't even know that fear.
As luck of the draw would have it, Shindou was his first opponent. Iijima resolved that Shindou would not force him to resign - Iijima was going to bring the game into yose if it killed him.
They settled into their seats, and Iijima noted without amusement that he had won black - not that it would help. Shindou was going to cruise through the exam like he did everything else.
It was unfair.
Maybe Shindou sensed Iijima's bitterness, because he turned his head slightly, his smile fading. He nodded, settling down, and Iijima stared into Shindou's face, seeing his impending defeat.
Brightly Burning
A Hikaru no Go Alternate Universe
Disclaimers: Hotta and Obata. Shonen Jump. Not Mine.
Note: lady_addiction has written two nice sides. They're on her LJ... Kudos for her the input on this chapter.
By the time the pro exams started, it was an accepted fact that there would only be two spots up for grabs. The third had already been staked out by Shindou Hikaru.
Since the Young Lions Tournament, the insei class had been graced with the presence of pros ranging from one-dan all the way through seventh. Most of them sought games with Shindou, but Shinoda wouldn't permit it, to the frustration of everyone involved.
"I don't think this is the appropriate time," he would say, before directing the hapless pro over to an insei who could use the practice. Most of the pros had been taught by Shinoda as insei, and didn't quite dare to protest.
Waya had been amused and irritated. With all the focus on Shindou, it was hard not to feel lost in the shuffle. His own sensei, Morishita, had gotten into the habit of asking Shindou for a second opinion, treating him more like a peer than a pupil. Had Shindou not been as oblivious as he was to the special respect accorded him, it would have made him universally detested by the insei. Instead, a sort of exasperated affection was shown to him as the insei tried to protect him from his own ignorance.
One pro who was conspicuous through his absence was Touya Akira. After a rather shocking article in Weekly Go - and Waya suspected Amano had been tactful and used the less incendiary quotes from Shindou - most people would have expected him to show up and challenge Shindou to put him in his place. Touya wasn't known for having a temper, but anyone would have been offended at the way Shindou had brushed him off.
He didn't show. Waya speculated about that with Honda, Nase and Iijima during a lunch break. Shindou had wandered off to parts unknown, making it convenient.
"Maybe he really didn't notice," Nase said, shrugging a bit. "He could have dismissed Shindou as a pretentious upstart."
"He is a pretentious upstart, but that doesn't make him less of a threat," Iijima said. "I don't think Touya is the type to get overconfident. He recognized Shindou as a rival."
Waya agreed. He had seen that look of stunned surprise in Touya's eyes after the game. "Maybe he's trying to be, you know, subtle? He still has a few months before Shindou enters the pro leagues."
"So he's waiting for an official match?" Honda asked.
"Maybe." Iijima folded his hands in his lap. "He does like tradition."
"Maybe he just doesn't care," Nase suggested.
Waya hardly saw that as a possibility, but the suggestions grew more and more outlandish as they continued their meal. He knew, as anyone who had a true desire to play Go would, that Touya's competitive spirit must have been stirred by the threat of the unknown. The game could have gone either way, and the next one might end in a loss for Touya.
Shindou was annoyed by the whole mess. He was under tremendous pressure and scrutiny, and once Waya almost beat him when he had made a mistake early in the game, distracted by a small "discussion" two pros who had been watching were having. They were ridiculing Shindou's opening joseki which had fallen out of fashion in the 30's as plain stupid. Shindou had been so annoyed he hadn't used a large enough keima, turning what would have been a slaughter into a close game.
Shindou had not been happy about playing through yose. He won, he always did, but the two moku victory was far below his usual standard. He was still weak in yose, so it might even have been beneficial for him, but Shindou hated playing poorly. Waya watched him try to calm himself as the pros started in on an after-game discussion.
"Let's go do something," Waya said, trying to divert Shindou from his annoyance.
Shindou perked right up, ignoring the two pros who were rambling about his comeback. "Oh? Do you know a new salon? I was thinking about going back to Dougenzaka and playing Kawai-san that game I promised him, but I'm not in the mood to argue with him today." He sent a dark look at their company.
"No... I mean, do something totally unrelated to Go. Watch a movie and grab some sushi." It had been a while since Waya had just hung out, and he could feel the need for a tension relieving night.
Shindou stared at Waya. "You know how to do things that don't involve Go?" His expression was completely dumbstruck.
This was one of those moments that Waya wondered if Shindou really was that stupid. The genuine curiosity wasn't mocking, just confused. "Shindou, do you honestly believe we eat, sleep and dream Go?" he asked in exasperation.
"I do," Shindou said, his tone utterly serious.
Waya tried to recall. The times they'd hung out before, they'd always talked about Go, or went places after going to Go salons first. Shindou would occasionally mention musical artists or his favorite baseball team when prompted, but he would act almost disinterested. Waya had always thought of Shindou as being more normal than most insei, but it was becoming clear that Shindou was slowly distancing himself from pop culture. "Shindou, don't you have a life? Go is great, but there's times when you have to move away from the goban!"
"No matter how hard or long I study, I will never know everything about Go. I don't have time to waste," Shindou said. "I want the hand of god."
"Shindou..." Waya said softly, unable to think of anything to say. He loved Go, but Shindou was obsessed. He didn't think it was healthy, but a small part of him was envious that the other was able to possess so much devotion.
Shindou shifted a bit on his feet, apparently sensing he'd done something wrong. "Did you have something you wanted to do?" he asked hastily. "It's probably a good idea to let our brains idle."
Waya saw the implied apology. "Sushi! And there's a new fun park that just opened that I've been meaning to try out. I haven't been on a roller coaster in months."
Shindou checked his wallet before agreeing. "Might be fun," he said, before calling his mother and letting her know he was going to be late.
The evening was worth it, Waya found out. Shindou seemed to relax, and his laughter was lighter and more frequent. They ate too much at the restaurant they stopped in first, and Shindou spilled a bit of soy sauce on his sleeve. Annoyed, he shed his sweatshirt, tying it around his waist. Beneath it he wore a brilliant yellow T-shirt that proclaimed his devotion to soccer in a fanciful font.
"Nice shirt," Waya commented dryly. The Eat My Cleats, Loser shirt hardly fit in with the image of a Go player.
Shindou glanced down to see what he was wearing. "Ah, yeah. It's an old one." He fingered the fabric idly. It was just a bit worn around the cuffs.
"Were you any good?"
"Huh?"
"Soccer. Were you any good?"
Shindou frowned slightly. "You've been talking to Akari, haven't you?"
It wasn't a secret that Waya was dating Shindou's best friend. Shindou had found it amusing and traumatizing at the same time, cracking jokes about being the best man and godfather to their first child. Waya had, as was characteristic, blushed, stammered and lost his temper. He did like Akari, and she was a sweet girl, but he was only sixteen. After threatening to choke Shindou using a goban and a bit of tape, Shindou had backed off somewhat.
"Um, a little."
"Don't you have better things to be talking about?" he asked. "Like names for your future children?"
Waya gritted his teeth before taking a deep breath. "Shindou, if you continue to be a jerk, we won't be naming any for you."
Shindou blinked, then laughed. "Like I'd want any of your children named after me! They'd look like you!" he said, before taking off down the street at a steady jog.
Shindou was in better shape then Waya, but the older insei managed to keep pace until they reached the train station. From there, they went to the amusement park.
Waya noted that Shindou preferred the scarier rides, the ones that made adrenaline pump as people were suspended 100 feet in the air. The faster the ride, the more Shindou enjoyed it, dragging Waya after him in a flurry of enthusiasm. Waya regretted the sushi they'd eaten after the third time on the roller coaster, but Shindou was practically shaking with unspent energy. It was like a dam had broken, and he couldn't hold still.
It was getting late, and Shindou was happily stuffing his face with cotton candy, something that made Waya groan a bit to himself. The last thing Shindou needed was a sugar buzz.
"This was fun," Shindou said as they finally left the park. His stuck his hands in his empty jeans pocket, slouching slightly as they walked back. Shindou had horrible posture. He could barely sit in seiza for an hour, Waya knew. He was always complaining about his feet falling asleep.
"It was, wasn't it?" Waya was toying with a good luck charm he had purchased, flipping it over and over in his right hand. Shindou had said he didn't need one. He looked up at the sky, wishing he could see the stars.
They were quiet as they arrived at the station. "Do you want to hang out during the prelims?" he asked.
"I... no, I can't." Shindou looked a bit uncomfortable. "I have some studying I need to be doing, and I want to finish my summer homework."
Waya nodded, understanding. Shindou may have enjoyed the night off, but he wasn't about to relax his endless pursuit of perfection. Shindou had made his choice about what was more important to him.
"See you, then."
"Right." Shindou offered a bit of a wave, and then took off.
The next time they met, they would be rivals.
On the first day of exams, Akari stopped by the Shindou residence. In her hands she cradled a bento, wrapped in a cheerful yellow cloth. It had been a while since she'd visited
Shindou Mitsuko was always happy to see the girl. She was so cheerful, a distinct difference from the moody Hikaru. She knew teenagers were supposed to change, but she missed her son's cheerful personality. She overcompensated on her welcome whenever she saw Akari because she wished she could return Hikaru to the smiling boy who had frustrated her.
"Ah, Akari-chan! Did you come to see Hikaru off?"
Akari nodded, her ponytails bouncing against her shoulders. "Yes... did he leave already?" she asked, trying to hide the disappointment in her voice. There was only about thirty minutes until the train left, but she had figured Hikaru would keep his usual cut-it-too-damned-close schedule.
"No, he's still getting ready," Mitsuko said with annoyance. "He overslept, and I had to drag him out of bed." She turned toward the stairs. "Hikaru! You're going to be late!" she yelled.
"I'm coming already!" was the reply that echoed from the stairs. "Hold on, would you?" Hikaru sounded irritated. There was a loud "thump!," probably the sound of Hikaru falling out of bed. Akari hid a giggle in her hand. It was nice to know some things didn't change.
Mitsuko winked at Akari. "Want to go get him for me?"
Once she would have bolted up the stairs and into his room without a second thought, but now that she was older, the idea brought a flush to life on her cheeks. She hadn't realized the differences between boys and girls when she was younger; Hikaru had merely been her best friend. "I'll wait," she said, wishing she wasn't so fair. She had to resemble a tomato at the moment.
Hikaru's mother smiled gently. "I was teasing. If he isn't down here in three minutes, I'll get him," she raised her voice so it carried up to Hikaru's room threateningly.
"Geez!" Hikaru shouted. "Be patient!"
Another "thump-thump!" and the sound of muffled cursing made Mitsuko shake her head. "Oh, Hikaru..." she sighed, more to herself than Akari. A smile of fond exasperation crossed her face. "Be right back, I need to get him some toast to eat while he'd running," she told Akari.
Akari waited a bit awkwardly. This home had once been as familiar as her own, but now her eyes fixated on the little changes made since she'd last come over. There were new cushions on the couch, and the wall clock had gained a crack. A new stain seemed to have appeared in the corner of the carpet, and flowers were in a vase she'd never seen before. They were small things, but enough to make her realize that time had moved on.
A "bam!" from a door signaled that Hikaru was out of his room, and then the thudding of his feet came. He appeared on the top of the stairs, taking the stairs three at a time at a speed that made Akari wonder if he was trying to break his neck. "Mom, I-" He nearly tripped as he skidded to a stop on seeing Akari, his forward momentum abruptly arrested. "Akari?"
She held the lunch out in front of herself like a peace offering. "I wanted to bring you lunch and walk you to the station."
"Did you make it?" he asked suspiciously as he started down the stairs at a more sedate pace.
"Yes," she answered in a 'don't you dare say anything about it' tone.
"Thanks," Hikaru said nervously, running a hand to smooth his hair. There were plenty of fly-away strands, which made Akari frown.
"Did you brush your hair?" she asked, juggling the lunch back and forth.
"No time!" He started to head for his shoes.
Akari rolled her eyes, set her package down on the hallway table, and rummaged through her bag. "It'll take thirty seconds!" she announced, practically pouncing on him with a comb. Hikaru yelped, and playfully tried to fend her off, but she ended up winning anyway, cornering him. "Just hold still!" she told him.
The light-hearted struggle set them both off laughing as she arranged his hair into a more neat coiffure. His hair was a bit dry from the constant bleaching of his bangs but still slid through the comb easily. Once she snagged a tangle, and he gave an exaggerated yelp of pain.
"Be quiet, you big baby! Take it like a man!" She tugged a piece of the undyed part.
He muttered something about her not knowing what men were like, tagged with a few epithets which would have earned him a mouthful of soap had his mother heard. Akari merely made a show of arranging the last piece neatly, before backing off. She had been laughing so hard that her sides were sore.
Mitsuko came back, a brilliant smile on her face. "It sounds like you're having fun," she noted.
"If you call being attacked by a lunatic fun," Hikaru griped, before brightening on seeing his mother holding a cup of juice and a slice of toast. "For me?" He practically yanked them out of her hands instead of waiting for a reply.
"I wonder why I bother when you're so rude," Mitsuko teased.
"Because you love me!" Hikaru announced, grinning a bit. Akari watched his Adam's apple bob up and down as he chugged the juice down in three long gulps, and then he handed the glass back to his mother. "Sankyou!" he slurred as he started to munch on his breakfast.
Mitsuko merely shook her head in mock disappointment. "I spend fifteen years trying to teach you manners, and this is what I get?"
He flashed her a "V" with his free hand, then shoved his feet into his shoes. "You know you love me!" he said cheerfully.
"Only on odd days of the month." Mitsuko was practically glowing as her son laughed at her. She looked over at the clock, and a bit of her light dimmed. "It's getting late," she said softly. "You should get going. When will you be home?"
"Probably not till after six. Don't wait for me for dinner."
"I'll keep something warm for you," she said, her voice softer. "Good luck." Then she nodded to Akari, and took the cup back to the kitchen.
Akari felt awkward. Hikaru sounded like a salaryman, so adult that it made her feel childish. She picked up the lunch again and held it out. "Hikaru?"
He shoved the last piece of toast in his mouth, chewing and swallowing quickly. "Thank, Akari." His fingers brushed hers as he claimed the food. "Did you want to walk with me?" he asked after a long moment of awkward silence.
She smiled at him, relieved that she was being offered a chance. "I would love to!"
He opened the door and motioned for her to proceed him. "Let's leave, then? I'm off!" he called behind him.
Hikaru set a brisk pace, walking faster than most people would have felt comfortable. Akari nearly had to jog to keep up, and couldn't find enough breath to start a conversation. It had been like this when they were younger, though. Hikaru had always been in such a hurry to get places - usually because he was behind schedule - that walking with him had turned into exercise.
Her breathing was heavy as they finally made it to the station. Hikaru didn't comment on the way she leaned forward as she tried to slow her body down. She could hear her heartbeat in her ears.
"Huh. We're early," he said idly.
"Only you would call five minutes early," she said. "Most people would be running for their trains."
"They always leave late," Hikaru said with the expertise of the experienced.
She tried to find something to say, and was surprised at the words that popped out of her mouth. "Hikaru, when you're done with the exam, do you think we could play a game?"
Hikaru blinked with surprise, then sniffed as he tilted his nose up slightly. "You're a hundred years too early to play me," he told her condescendingly. "Even if you placed 20 stones, I'd still slaughter you."
She stomped her foot angrily. "Hikaru!" She knew he was very good, but she was trying and wasn't that what counted?
The smile that broke across his face was the happiest she'd seen him in a while. "Just kidding. Maybe next week sometime?" he offered, light dancing in his eyes.
She thought on her schedule quickly. She had been planning on taking a trip to Shibuya to do some shopping with her girlfriends, but she could probably clear Thursday. Having the chance to spend time with Hikaru would be worth more.
"Thursday?"
He shook his head. "I'll be playing another exam game. Maybe some other time?"
"My family is going to the hot springs until Wednesday, and Friday I have to meet with Haruna-chan to discuss class activities."
"We'll find some time eventually," he said. There was a muffled announcement Akari didn't quite catch, but it was apparently enough for Hikaru. "There's my train."
She nodded, choking up.
"Aren't you going to wish me good luck?" he asked.
She knew he was teasing; he'd told her numerous times he didn't believe in luck, only himself. It had become a joke between them - she would wish him luck, he would same something pithy, and then she'd smack him.
This time, her voice wouldn't rise to the occasion. She stared at him stupidly, her lips slightly parted as her throat closed up, unable to fulfil their usual ritual.
Hikaru seemed to understand, because his expression softened. He ignored the crowd around them, wrapping his arms around her waist as he drew her close for a hug. "I'm sorry, Akari," he whispered into her hair. "I'm sorry."
She clung to him, but the speakers repeated their calls for passengers of the 9:20 terminating in Ichigaya Station. Then he pulled away, and he tapped her nose playfully. "Study hard, okay?"
Akari nodded, but still couldn't speak. He smiled at her a bit sadly again, then turned to walk into the crowd. As she watched the back of his head, she wrapped her arms around herself reassuringly. "Good luck," she said, too late for him to hear.
She decided to ignore the tears falling down her cheeks. Maybe if she pretended they didn't exist, they would go away. Hikaru was disappearing before her very eyes, and there was nothing she could do about it.
She knew she was losing her best friend.
Iijima Ryou was a good Go player, a touch bogged down by technicalities, but still solid. His game lacked imagination, he knew, but he understood Go better than almost anyone. His ability to predict who would win in any match had earned him numerous pools among the insei. To him, Go was something which could be predicted like the course of the stars.
If there was one person he hated playing, it was Shindou Hikaru. The only thing that was predictable about Shindou was that he would invariably win. He played with a strong, cunning style, making moves which seemed suicidal, but which actually were the sign of an innovative mind. With the exception of his loss to Touya Akira, he'd maintained a perfect record. It wasn't just impressive, it was unheard of. Shindou had to be some kind of monster.
Like usual, Shindou managed to cut it close, showing up for the exams less than five minutes before they started. The storm boomed melodramatically outside as Shindou shook his head, trying to get rid of the stray droplets of water that he'd collected. His expression was extremely put-upon as he swore softly under his breath.
"Shindou's on time!" Waya feigned having a heart attack, dropping to his knees melodramatically. Honda just rolled his eyes, while Nase snickered.
"Laugh it up," Shindou said grouchily. "The bus driver almost forgot my stop."
"Ouch," Waya said. "That's your kind of luck, isn't it?"
"If I stood in a crowd in the middle of a field on a perfectly sunny day, lightning would still find me," Shindou grouched. Nase tutted at him while Waya pretended to play the violin, mocking him.
"Least your luck in Go isn't like that," Honda murmured, sounding a bit envious. This was his last pro exam before graduation, like Iijima. No matter what happened, neither would be returning to the insei. Iijima hadn't decided yet if he was going to give up the game, but the pressure from his parents was intense.
"Luck has little to do with Go," Shindou replied, his voice sharper than was polite. "Go is a game of skill."
"Luck can be a skill," Fukui said. Fukui depended heavily on changes of fortune to effect his wins.
"We make our own luck," Shindou said. "We take the abilities we have and use them. Sometimes there's things we can't avoid, but we do what we can." He glanced around the room, and stiffened a bit. "Are those the outsider people you told me about?" Shindou asked curiously. He pointedly looked over to a group comprised of primarily men in their twenties. The men stared back a bit hostilely, and one, noting Shindou's blond hair, murmured something to another. Within moments, the whole group was studying at Shindou.
"Why are they staring at me like that?" he asked, sounding a bit annoyed. He grabbed Waya's shoulder and stepped behind him.
"Weekly Go? A certain player saying he was going to beat Touya-meijin? Ring any bells?"
"I didn't say that! I said I wanted to play him!" Shindou protested.
"After giving Touya Akira one of the closest games of his career?" Nase patted him on the shoulder. "You poor, clueless child," she said consoling before ruffling his hair.
Their babble was annoying and set Iijima on edge. He tried to calm his breathing and find his center.
Shindou stuck his tongue out. "I can't help it if I'm gifted!"
His protest just rubbed in the differences. Waya grabbed him around the neck, forcibly ruffling his hair. "Stop being so arrogant!" he said, his teeth flashing in a fearsome grin.
Iijima felt the tension that was like a stretched rubber band through the room. Fukui, Nase, Waya, Honda, himself - all of them had a lot to lose. Shindou wouldn't even know that fear.
As luck of the draw would have it, Shindou was his first opponent. Iijima resolved that Shindou would not force him to resign - Iijima was going to bring the game into yose if it killed him.
They settled into their seats, and Iijima noted without amusement that he had won black - not that it would help. Shindou was going to cruise through the exam like he did everything else.
It was unfair.
Maybe Shindou sensed Iijima's bitterness, because he turned his head slightly, his smile fading. He nodded, settling down, and Iijima stared into Shindou's face, seeing his impending defeat.