This is Why I'm Hot
It's over 100 degrees today, just like it's been all week and is likely to be ALL SUMMER LONG. I'MMA GO HAVE A HEAT STROKE NOW.
What could make it hotter? Another chapter of Shooting Stars. :D (No, nothing happens but more CRUDDY ACTION SEQUENCES. SERIOUSLY, WHY AM I SO TERRIBLE AT WRITING PPG VIOLENCE? MY AVATAR VIOLENCE ALWAYS COMES OUT OKAY. TT_TT)
But anyway. Update nao.
Chapter Seven: Dispatch
“Blegh,” Jackie wrinkled her nose at the movie Mom and Amanda were watching. Amanda was in tears, pressing a tissue to her nose while Mom clutched a hand to her heart. “How can you guys stand this?”
“It’s a beautiful romantic story,” Mom whispered as the actor on the TV cried, the body of his apparent love interest limp in his arms.
“But she dies at the end,” Jackie pointed out.
“That’s what makes it beautiful,” Amanda murmured. “It was a forbidden love torn apart by society and her sickness. But even as she dies, you know they’re still in love and they’ll be together forever.”
Jackie studied the screen, then turned back to her mother.
“I’m never going to be like that,” she declared. “When I meet my true love I won’t mess it up. And I won’t be that sappy.”
“Never say never, sweetheart,” Mom dabbed at her eyes. “The best-laid plans often go awry.”
Jackie huffed, returning to her room, where she cuddled her Prince Charming doll and told him she didn’t understand her mother and sister at all.
-*-
“Up and at ‘em, sleepyhead,” Jackie heard her dad’s unusually cheerful voice through the pillow dragged over her head. “Today’s a big day.”
“Unless today has something to do with world peace or an end to world hunger, I shouldn’t be up for another three hours,” Jackie grumbled. She then squealed as she was hauled out of bed by her ankle and unceremoniously dropped on the floor. She sat up, rubbing her head and scowling. Brick’s bright face came down level with her own, smiling entirely too broadly for Jackie’s liking.
“Get some breakfast while I go get your cousins,” he said. “And make sure it’s a healthy one; don’t want you yakking it up today.”
He exited and she followed, floating down the stairs to the kitchen and pouring herself a bowl of Cheerios.
While she ate Brick went to Janey’s house next, amused to find her passed out under her bed. He dragged her out by her ankles and dumped a nearby cup of water on her face, effectively waking her up. She rubbed at her face, grimacing and spluttering.
“My house in fifteen minutes,” he said cheerily. “If you’re not there a bucket of ice will follow that refreshing little splash.” He let his words work their magic while he zoomed to Jezebel’s.
She was curled up under her blankets, tucked into a neat little ball with her hair spread out behind her. Brick studied her room, then picked up a stuffed animal shaped like some sort of octopus with a dragon body and smacked Jezebel in the face.
She snorted awake immediately. “Sherlock Holmes abducted by space gnomes!” she shrieked, her speech still garbled as she bolted upright.
“That’s what I like to hear,” Brick said lightly. “My house in fifteen minutes, or the octopus gets it.”
“Cthulhu,” Jezebel grumbled, reaching for the doll. He held it out of her reach.
“Gesundheit,” he replied. “You’ve got close to ten minutes now. You can eat at my house, just be there.”
He didn’t stay to see her pull herself out of bed, but ten minutes later both girls were standing in his kitchen, helping themselves to his cereal and throwing him death glares.
“Why is your hair wet?” Jezebel asked.
“Don’t ask,” Janey replied darkly, shoving a spoonful of Lucky Charms in her mouth.
“Any particular reason why we’re up at this ungodly hour, Father Dearest?” Jackie asked. “The sun’s not even up yet.”
“Because, Beloved Daughter,” Brick replied, “today you girls are going on your first patrol.”
All three brightened at once.
“You’ve been training for a little over two weeks now, five days a week, without fail,” he said. “You’ve improved far beyond my wildest dreams. I think you’re ready to take on the real thing. Your fathers don’t agree,” he chuckled, “but what they don’t know won’t hurt them. Finish your breakfast, then join me on the roof.”
Once this was done and all four were standing on the roof of Jackie’s house Brick launched into his lecture.
“Behold, Townsville,” he said dramatically, sweeping his arm across the cityscape. “What you’ve been training to protect for months now, filled to the brim with overly optimistic citizens and the main target of monsters for forty years.”
“Yeah, we know,” Janey rolled her eyes. “Can you cut the cheerfulness? You’re starting to freak me out.”
“Alright, smart aleck, this is the plan for today,” Brick winked at her, unsettling all three girls even more. “A city like this gets up and moving early. Crime never sleeps, but its victims do; once the victims come out to play, the criminals come out. I’m sure you girls have noticed that the crime rates are creeping back up these past few weeks. While you’re still learning, now is the best time to get your feet wet before the underground really starts taking advantage of your moms’…absence.”
“Um…are we supposed to have uniforms or something?” Jackie asked.
“You’ll get those when you prove yourselves against the city,” Brick replied. “I’ll be in the wings in case things get out of hand, but for the most part, you three are on your own. Keep in mind that I’m watching you, and good luck.” With that he painted a red stripe against the brightening sky and the girls followed, stopping on the top of the Townsville Space Needle to observe the goings-on of their fair city.
“Okay, ladies,” Jackie said, “things seem pretty quiet for now. We’ll take a quick circle around the outer perimeter and work our way in. Sound good?”
“Whatever,” Janey yawned. Jezebel merely nodded.
-*-
It was close to noon before anything happened; Jezebel caught the sound of alarms first, and in a matter of seconds the girls were kicking down the door of Townsville National Bank.
“Freeze!” Jackie yelled, to be met with a sizable automatic weapon in her face. Her first instinct was to flinch away, but she held her ground.
“Boss, I thought you said they were out of town!” one of the goons shrieked, dropping his full sack of money.
“They are, stupid, that’s not them,” the leader of the operation, a beefy man with a sizable scar across his chin, scoffed. “What’s wrong, girlies, you lost or something? The mall is down the street.”
“Surrender,” Jackie held out a hand to calm Jezebel, who bristled, “and we’ll go easy on you.”
“Are you not listening? I said scram,” the boss laughed. “Before I get angry.”
Jackie looked at the gun in her face, raised her hand, and pinched the barrel closed between her index finger and thumb. She then twisted the gun out of the goon’s hands and smacked him across the face with it. The rest of the grunts (Jackie counted about six) all raised their guns and open fired. Jezebel snorted as the bullets pinged off her skin.
“That tickles.”
She proceeded to melt the nearest gun to her with her laser vision. The man holding it dropped the twisted mass of liquefied metal quickly, rubbing his burned hands on his pants and blowing on them.
“Girls, let’s show these gentlemen how we like to play,” Jackie smiled genially. About five seconds later the other five guns were smashed or melted and their users in various stages of consciousness. Jackie kicked the boss in the side of the head and planted her foot in the middle of his shoulders.
“What-what are you?” the man coughed around the loose teeth in his mouth.
“Townsville’s new heroes,” Jackie said grandly as the sound of police sirens filled the air. “Spread the word. Just because the Powerpuff Girls aren’t here doesn’t mean they left their home unprotected.”
“Enough of the monologing, Jack, we’ve got another situation,” Janey called from where she and Jezebel were securing the would-be robbers. “Fifth and Avenue.”
The girls jetted out of the bank and down a few blocks, where they pummeled a man as he tried to snatch an old lady’s purse (to her credit, the tough old bird wasn’t letting go for love or money). The next few hours were spent in this manner; it seemed more and more thieves kept cropping up every time they put down one insurrection.
Finally, about three, things seemed to calm down and the girls caught a breather and a hot dog in the park.
“Man,” Janey sighed, “that’s a whole lot harder than it looks.”
“That’s nothing,” Jackie shook her head. “This is just housekeeping.”
“Get ready for a big mess,” Jezebel said serenely. “Here comes a monster.”
“You’re kidding, right?” Janey groaned. An echoing roar drifted through the hot Townsville haze, and she swore.
“Let’s go.” Jackie swallowed the rest of her hot dog and took off, Jezebel and Janey on her heels.
Crawling out of the sea came an enormous blob, sickly purple in color. It had no discernable features other than a dark orb in the middle of its mass, about the size of a small dog.
“Flight plan Beta,” Jackie called, “Eyebeams. Go.”
The girls broke off from their usual formation, Janey circling the bottom, Jackie the middle, Jezebel the top, laser eyes on full blast. As Jackie suspected, the blob swatted in the air with its pseudopods, bubbling and boiling. After a few seconds it exploded, coating Townsville in its slime. Left behind was the small orb, now pulsating red.
“Got it,” Janey called, swooping in to pick it up. She flew upwards towards Jackie and Jezebel, with the intent to check it out with them.
Before she could reach them her hands were coated in purple ooze. A thin arm of it reached up and latched onto Janey’s face. She screamed, trying to dislodge her hands from around the orb to grapple with the goo on her face. The purple substance stuck, growing larger and sucking Janey’s arms into it. She crashed into an office building, and the blob expanded rapidly, attaching to the building face and regaining half of its original volume in a matter of seconds.
“Janey!” Jackie yelled as she and Jezebel flew towards the blob. Janey was panicking, kicking out and trying to blast her way out of the monster’s innards, to no avail. Jackie plunged her hand into the blob and grabbed Janey by the wrist as Jezebel tried melting the monster back down.
“Don’t do that, you’ll kill her!” Jackie called. “Gimme a hand here!”
Jezebel reached in the ooze and grabbed Janey’s other arm, pulling with all her might as Jackie did the same. After a tense moment a giant sucking sound like a plunger being pulled echoed across the street, followed by a crash as all three girls tore up a substantial strip of asphalt with their momentum.
“Ugh,” Janey shuddered, trying to wipe the residue off, “this reeks. Oh no, it’s all in my hair….”
“Worry about that later. We can’t let this thing get any farther into Townsville than it already is,” Jackie said tersely. As they spoke the blob swelled several stories and started absorbing a building. As it did so the orb glowed green. Jackie studied it for a second.
“Janey, are you good to go?” she asked. Janey ceased wringing out her braids and nodded. “You two go back to Beta and eyebeams. I’ll bear down from above. As soon as that sphere is exposed I’m going to hit it hard.”
Janey and Jezebel nodded, taking off and circling the monster once more. Jackie hovered above the reducing mass, focusing all her concentration on the orb, which was again glowing red. After a few minutes the sphere was exposed and devoid of slime. Once Janey and Jezebel saw it was a sphere again, they stopped the eyebeams; it started secreting the purple ooze the second they let off.
“Keep up the eyebeams! That should stop it from regenerating!” Jackie yelled. “I’m going in!”
“If we do, you’ll get fried!” Janey replied.
“You let me worry about that. Keep it up,” Jackie ordered. The other two wordlessly complied. Once back down to its basic sphere Jackie rammed her fist down hard on it. The lasers burned her skin, but it was already healing as she hit it again. After about four hits the orb started to crack. Jackie gritted her teeth.
“Come on, you stubborn freak of nature, come on,” she murmured, hitting it harder. Out of frustration she dealt it one more kick that melted her shoe a little, and the thing shattered. Janey and Jezebel stopped the eye lasers in surprise.
Left behind was a wriggling, scaly…thing. If Jackie had to hazard a guess it looked like a hairless reptilian bear cub. It sneezed, opened its mouth wide, and screamed. Jackie was bowled back by the force of its projection and Janey quickly stopped it by grabbing it by the throat.
“Aw,” Jezebel cooed, “it’s so cute!”
“Jez,” Janey frowned, “there’s something wrong with you.”
“Um…okay, girls,” Jackie said, dazed, “toss that thing back out to sea and let’s do another round over the city.”
Janey flew up high, wound up, and let the monster fly, squealing all the way, to the ocean. About halfway through its journey it formed a new orb, but didn’t regenerate its blob as it bobbed back towards Monster Island.
“I’m going to have to wash my hair for a week to get all of this out,” Janey complained, floating back to the others.
“Nicely done,” Brick said, floating suddenly down to stand behind them. “I’d call that a day. Get home and washed up. Mayor Bellum knows who to call if things get out of hand.”
Jackie nodded, suddenly exhausted and feeling her burned hands keenly.
“Finally,” Janey sighed. “Sweet relaxation.”
The girls powered up and jetted home, Janey dropping smears of purple grease below her. Jackie, after taking a shower, soaked her hands in a bowl of cold water and sighed.
Of course, at that moment her phone decided to ring. Sighing, she carefully dried her hand off and answered it, putting it on speaker and easing her hand back into the water.
“Hello?”
“Hello, is this Jackie?”
The only thing keeping Jackie from hanging up was the sudden throb in her fingers.
“Yes,” she sighed. “Can I help you?”
“Actually, you can,” Duke replied. “You see, I am, what’s the phrase…ah, going mad, stuck here with my sister, and I was wondering if I might get a tour around this fair city.”
“So hire a tour guide,” Jackie frowned. “I’m a little busy right now.”
“Oh, sure, one could hire a guide, but a guide would surely give a very dry presentation,” Duke countered. “I’d rather see it through a true Townsvillian’s eyes.”
“So call Mimi or Janey,” Jackie said. “How did you get this number, anyway?”
“Er-Mimi,” he replied quickly. “I’m afraid you misunderstood me, ma cherie. I want you to show me around.”
Jackie released a breath through her nose slowly. It wasn’t fair of him to use his voice like that when she was doing her level best to be indifferent.
“I just spent all day cleaning up the streets. I’m exhausted. Now is not a good time,” Jackie played her last card.
“Tomorrow, then,” Duke followed up swiftly. Jackie thought about it. Tomorrow was Saturday. She had no excuse. Crap.
“Fine,” she sighed. “I guess a quick tour wouldn’t hurt.”
“Excellent. We can meet at La Casa de Rosas. Lunch on me,” he said.
“La Casa de Rosas?” Jackie choked. “I think that’s a little fancy for a tour.”
“I believe in treating pretty girls how they deserve, ma cherie,” Duke said smoothly. “A beautiful and passionate woman merits a meal that tangos across her taste buds.”
“Uh-huh,” Jackie coughed. “Um. How about McDonald’s instead?”
There was a pause and a light chuckle. “McDonald’s it is.”
-*-
Jackie’s foot tapped impatiently. Where is he?
As if summoned by her thought Duke appeared, dressed impeccably casual and holding a deep pink rose.
“For you,” he said, slipping the flower into her hand. “Well, here we are, ma cherie. Are you hungry?”
Jackie shook her head, but her stomach’s loud grumbling betrayed her. She avoided his bright smile by studying her shoes.
“Would you prefer a burger or a chicken sandwich?” he asked, turning to the menu. “Personally, I prefer the Big Mac. They make them so small in Europe, you know. American food certainly has its perks.”
“McChicken,” Jackie said hesitantly. “With fries. And Sprite.”
After a few minutes Jackie and Duke were seated in a booth, munching quietly.
“You’re not much of a conversationalist, are you?” Duke asked finally.
“I can be,” Jackie replied. Duke waited expectantly for a moment, but she merely took a bite out of her sandwich and looked out the window.
“I see,” he nodded. “You don’t like me very much.”
“Not particularly, no,” Jackie shook her head.
“Then instruct me,” he laid his burger in its box, “on how best to improve.”
“Well, you can stop trying to be overly romantic, for one,” Jackie set her drink down, counting off on her fingers. “You can stop trying to talk to me, stop stalking me, and the cherry on top would be to go back in time and stop your mother from having kids. That would about do it.”
Duke opened his mouth, closed it, then laughed quietly.
“I’ll let you in on a badly-kept secret,” he said. “I don’t like Princess any more than you do. If I’d been raised with my mother and sister, perhaps you would have grounds for this…dislike of yours.”
She flushed deeply and buried her face in her fries.
“Princess may be my mother, but I’m sure I’ve never met anyone less suited to it,” he continued. “Queenie’s on the right track to being just like her, of course, though without Mother’s redeeming qualities of genius for business and affinity for weapons technology. Those happy talents,” he grinned, “lie with me.”
Jackie stuffed yet more fries in her mouth to buy time for her response, but Duke went on.
“I’m sure you know my parents are divorced. My father took me with him when he returned to Europe. I’m fluent in French and Spanish, and know enough Portuguese and German to get by; I enjoy composing theories about achieving world peace, inventing more efficient technology, and long walks on the beach. I’ve dated young models and obscure European nobility, but none of them,” he leaned forward, “intrigue me as the beautiful redhead before me does.” He finished with one of his knee-dissolving smiles. Jackie snapped her jaw shut, mouthed for her straw, and sucked up half-melted ice.
“Now that the boring stuff is out of the way,” he picked up his burger again, “how about that tour? And I would love to hear something about you, now that most of my life’s story is on the table.” There was an ironic ring to his words that didn’t entirely miss Jackie’s notice. Until he boxed up his burger, tossed it in the trash, and offered her his arm, that is. They walked out into the warm afternoon air and Jackie took a breath.
And she talked. Townsville mostly forgotten, she told Duke about her powers, her older sister and younger brother, her broken leg when she was six, her various volunteer projects, her spring allergies. He listened even when she started babbling, and told her about the time he tried calamari and hated it. She told him about the time she cooked a whole lobster by herself without her father knowing about it. Quite by accident it was nearly six-thirty before Jackie checked her phone and saw sixteen missed calls from Janey and Rob.
“Oh,” she said, “I’ve got to go.”
“If you must,” Duke heaved a sigh. “May I see you again? Preferably soon?”
“I dunno. You tell me,” Jackie smiled.
“Until later, then,” he returned the smile. Jackie blushed, giggled, and jumped into the air to fly away. She nearly crashed head-first into an office building and loop-the-looped away, Duke’s laughter ringing in her scarlet ears.