Tran-E
So there's a convincing transvestite in my C++ class. On the first day of class at first glance I thought "that's a tranny." But after a minute I thought "well, this is a computer class... maybe it's just an unfortunate-looking lady with saggy breasts." She's about 6'1, 190 pounds and rather lean. After our teacher took roll she noticed that this 'lady' never raised her hand at any point so she said to her "and ma'am, what was your name?" to which the 'lady' responded in her best attempt at a female's voice "uhhh, could we talk about this later?" Obviously 'her' name on the class list was Thomas or Richard or something and 'she' didn't want everyone to know she was in fact a male. Now don't get me wrong; I'm not a hater or anything. It's my belief that everyone has the right to do whatever they like. It's just sort of peculiar to me to get such close and regular contact with a tranny. Today after class I wandered over to the main building to hit up the Subway. This guy who was waiting for the elevator with me was like "Hey man, what's up?" He was very friendly, but I think it was probably because he was on vicodin or morphine or something; he had a cane and some sort of cast around his ankle. So the elevator finally comes and we step in and face my tranny and this other cute girl. This guy was obviously feeling rather social because he goes "what's up ladies?" and asks them to which floor they're going despite the fact that they had already hit the buttons. So he strikes up a conversation with the tranny (whose name I don't know) and asks her if she's going to class and blah blah blah. The tranny cordially responds to his interrogation and then is the first one off. Once the door is shut, I say in a sing-song voice "tranny." This guy is like "what? Huh?" "That was a transvestite," I say. The other girl says that yeah, 'she' definitely had an adam's apple and I quickly tell him the story about the first day of computer class. Haha, it looked like it ruined his day. He was like "ohhh mannnnn," and looked ill. But I guess if I was drunk or high on narcotics and hadn't seen this 'broad' before I'd be like "WHAT A WOMAN" too. I never noticed any transvestites at Grand Valley.
I play the clarinet. I joined the Wind Ensemble at school. I guess they really needed me because without me there would be more tubas than clarinets. It's really excellent fun; I had missed playing in a group. We're playing some serious music, including Shostakovitch's Festive Overture which has a bitching clarinet part. It really burns me up for the most part that I don't get the top spot. I'm not even really certain how the seating works, but I'm generally playing third or fourth part, probably because I'm the only one that isn't a music major. Playing the bottom parts is actually a nice change of pace for me since I've been playing first or solo part just about my whole life. I get some really nice low-register moving lines that would normally be neglected by the last-chair player. But listening to this third-year music major screw up the same solos and parts over and over really bothers me. I hear this girl in the practice room and she sounds really great! But when we get to the band room she just chokes EVERY time. Honestly, she hasn't played the solo even once as well as I could play it every time. The director knows I'm a much better player than she is. I play her solos by memory when she's gone, which is more often than most people are gone from the group. I think he's just afraid of her. We have our first concert this Sunday. If she's still screwing up the solo on Wednesday, I'm going to say something. As much as she might hate it, the director really owes it to the band to get someone who can play the fucking part. The solo is epic and deserves to be played correctly.
I got to spend a few hours on Saturday with a nine-week-old kitten. It warmed my heart! I love cats, kittens especially. We shared a Stouffer's chicken pot pie, played a little bit and took a nap. Do you know what's great about a Stouffer's pot pie? Well, I'll tell you. Not only is the gravy made with real cream, but you cook it at 375 degrees for 80 minutes. Most quality pot pies ($3+) are cooked for 60 minutes at 400 degrees. According to Patrick's Property of Proportional Preparatory Palatability, the Stouffer's tastes better because it takes longer to prepare. It's true! But yes, I think the kitten really took to me. I hope I get to spend some time with her again before she's given away. It was absolutely adorable watching Ether trying to eat these delicious chunks of chicken which were probably a little too large for her. She made it work but seemed to be rather tentative about eating them - very cute! The pot pie actually kind of sucked since I gave the kitten most of the chicken (only a real jerk would feed a cat peas and carrots) but I don't care; I'd eat vegetarian pot pies (yuck) from now on if I got to share them with a kitten every time. I let her bat around for the cord to my old headphones for a little while and then we laid down for a nap. I slept on my back, which is unusual for me, and Ether laid right on the top of my chest and sort of wrapped herself around my chin. It was definitely a Kodak moment; she never stopped purring, at least that I noticed. Anyone that doesn't enjoy the company of a friendly cat is truly a fool; cats are wonderful companions!
Well that's it for now. I have a test in my stupid science class at 9am. It's funny though that I'm getting a better grade in Calculus Physics than I am in Physical Science 101 which is chemistry and physics for retards... oh well. I mean no offense to you retards out there; you get what I'm saying.
I play the clarinet. I joined the Wind Ensemble at school. I guess they really needed me because without me there would be more tubas than clarinets. It's really excellent fun; I had missed playing in a group. We're playing some serious music, including Shostakovitch's Festive Overture which has a bitching clarinet part. It really burns me up for the most part that I don't get the top spot. I'm not even really certain how the seating works, but I'm generally playing third or fourth part, probably because I'm the only one that isn't a music major. Playing the bottom parts is actually a nice change of pace for me since I've been playing first or solo part just about my whole life. I get some really nice low-register moving lines that would normally be neglected by the last-chair player. But listening to this third-year music major screw up the same solos and parts over and over really bothers me. I hear this girl in the practice room and she sounds really great! But when we get to the band room she just chokes EVERY time. Honestly, she hasn't played the solo even once as well as I could play it every time. The director knows I'm a much better player than she is. I play her solos by memory when she's gone, which is more often than most people are gone from the group. I think he's just afraid of her. We have our first concert this Sunday. If she's still screwing up the solo on Wednesday, I'm going to say something. As much as she might hate it, the director really owes it to the band to get someone who can play the fucking part. The solo is epic and deserves to be played correctly.
I got to spend a few hours on Saturday with a nine-week-old kitten. It warmed my heart! I love cats, kittens especially. We shared a Stouffer's chicken pot pie, played a little bit and took a nap. Do you know what's great about a Stouffer's pot pie? Well, I'll tell you. Not only is the gravy made with real cream, but you cook it at 375 degrees for 80 minutes. Most quality pot pies ($3+) are cooked for 60 minutes at 400 degrees. According to Patrick's Property of Proportional Preparatory Palatability, the Stouffer's tastes better because it takes longer to prepare. It's true! But yes, I think the kitten really took to me. I hope I get to spend some time with her again before she's given away. It was absolutely adorable watching Ether trying to eat these delicious chunks of chicken which were probably a little too large for her. She made it work but seemed to be rather tentative about eating them - very cute! The pot pie actually kind of sucked since I gave the kitten most of the chicken (only a real jerk would feed a cat peas and carrots) but I don't care; I'd eat vegetarian pot pies (yuck) from now on if I got to share them with a kitten every time. I let her bat around for the cord to my old headphones for a little while and then we laid down for a nap. I slept on my back, which is unusual for me, and Ether laid right on the top of my chest and sort of wrapped herself around my chin. It was definitely a Kodak moment; she never stopped purring, at least that I noticed. Anyone that doesn't enjoy the company of a friendly cat is truly a fool; cats are wonderful companions!
Well that's it for now. I have a test in my stupid science class at 9am. It's funny though that I'm getting a better grade in Calculus Physics than I am in Physical Science 101 which is chemistry and physics for retards... oh well. I mean no offense to you retards out there; you get what I'm saying.