Quarter Century
I hate dating. It's this ridiculous convention we've created to mirror our societies, our interpersonal relationships, our jobs. What do they all have in common? Hope and anxiety. We live our lives, struggling to stay sane in the bustle of a maelstrom of lunacy we call civilization, only for the hope that one day, it will all be better, it will all get solved, and we will all be...happy. In our relationships, no matter how boring and shallow they are, no matter how much they hurt us, no matter how fake they appear to be, we hold out hope that one day, they will give us a return on our investment and make us...happy. We get new jobs with the hope of earning vast success and wealth, making a difference, or whatever else we tell ourselves we're working for, so that one day, we will achieve those dreams our jobs afford us and be...happy. In the midst of waiting, we are anxious, riddled with fears that society will collapse and take us with it, or friends and family might perish and sever their ties with us, and that we will be fired, laid off, or spend eternity in some sad excuse for employment, all because one day, these same feisty unpredictable things will make us...happy.
Enter dating, the ridiculous small-scale social answer to these larger, looming issues. We have hope that someone will make us happy, the only trick is finding the asshole before someone else does. So we proceed to put on the makeup of disguise and be the best we can be, put our best foot forward, all conveniently summed up in one word; lie. So we lie, or dance around, or even being honest, must conform to rules and etiquettes. The whole thing is some weird sadistic game we've invented so nothing can ever be easy, or fun, or real.
People who screw up their first impression at least have one thing to be thankful for: they know where they stand before they put anything into it. Me, please. First impressions are a breeze for the most part, but maybe that's because all of the energy and savvy I use breaking barriers the first time around has Newtonian consequences the second time around, who knows. What I do know is, once you think you have a chance in an already anxious competition, doing something stupid and screwing that up is a pain so frustrating it makes you want to stop trying. Therein lies the reason why this game is the least fun of all.