Dear Diary - Chapter 8
Title - Dear Diary
Author - QueenWillie
Pairing - Danie/Wilhelmina
Disclaimer - Don't own 'em, never will.
Summary - Can all this animosity really just be over a job.
Beta - The Fab Dardeile
Chapter 8
‘Questions like; just when where you going to tell me you got rid of my child?’
Wilhelmina felt hot and cold all at once; she felt her breath coming in short rasps as her panic began to rise. She felt the wave of nausea hit her and her heart quicken. She wanted to scream at him but thought she might vomit if she opened her mouth. Daniel continued to stare at her, enjoying her discomfort and waiting for her answer. Well, he had a long wait ahead of him.
Daniel couldn’t help but notice the close proximity of their bodies and unbidden images of last night came to him. The way she had felt moving against him, the taste of her skin. The sound of her voice as she called his name. Images that this morning would have caused his body to crave her now only made his stomach churn in the wake of this revelation.
Trying her hardest to steady her breathing she used all the strength she could find and tried to remove his vice-like grip trapping her in her chair. He wouldn’t be moved; he leaned in closer and whispered in her face. ‘Answer me.’
When she didn’t respond he bellowed at her. ‘Answer me!’
Even if she had wanted to, in that moment there was no way she could. She had never seen him like this before. His eyes were huge and dark, his teeth partially bared and she could literally feel the heat of his anger. His hands were spasmodically tightening round the arms of her chair and she guessed he was using all his control not to wrap them round her neck and apply the same pressure. She let out a huge breath she didn’t know she was holding when she heard voices coming from the door of her office.
‘Daniel!’ Willie recognised the high pitch of Betty’s voice.
‘Stay out of this Betty.’
‘Get away from her.’ It was Marc, sounding much braver than he felt.
Daniel chuckled and turned his head slightly to look at the other man. ‘Or what Marc, we’re going to meet at the flagpole at 4?’
Using his brief distraction to her advantage, Wilhelmina dug her nails into his hand making him retract them in pain. Pushing him to the side she bolted from the chair. Daniel realised his mistake and made a grab for her but Marc and Betty were too quick and stood between the pair like some bizarre piggy in the middle.
‘Daniel, what the hell!?’ Betty shouted at him.
‘We’re not through here ‘til I get my answer.’
‘What answer?’ asked Marc.
Looking over their heads Daniel saw Wilhelmina shake her head almost imperceptibly, her eyes pleading that he didn’t tell them what those pages contained. Seeing this, he laughed.
‘Oh you don’t want me to tell? Well that’s hardly fair; after all they’ve been Shaggy and Velma to my Fred all through this little mystery.’
The air seemed to change around them as Daniels words hung in the air. Marc had his back to Wilhelmina and was loathe to turn and face her. Biting the bullet, he turned slowly and found Wilhelmina looking at him with a look he had only seen when Connor had left, broken, defeated and it was worse than any punishment he had previously imagined, knowing this look was directed at him.
‘Willie I...’
‘No’ It was barley a whisper but it stopped Marc in his tracks. Wilhelmina walked around him to her desk in the office which no longer felt like hers. Keeping one eye on Daniel she reached for the book he had discarded there. She walked back to Marc and thrust it against his chest.
‘Read it.’ Her voice was still a murmur.
Marc shook his head, ‘I don’t want to.’
She pushed it firmer into his chest. ‘Don’t start something you can’t finish!’ Her voice was gaining strength now. ‘Read it...now. Oh, you too Velma.’
Marc swallowed and began to read the entry that had been smudged with Daniel’s tears and fingerprints.
February 23rd 1995
This is the sixth morning in a row I’ve been praying to the porcelain God. I’ve been ignoring the symptoms, hoping it will go away when I know it won’t. I can’t do this, we can’t do this. Fey already hates the fact that I have one child splitting my attention from the magazine. It’s all Mode with her, she handed her own baby to her accountant without a moments’ hesitation because she didn’t want a child in the way of her career.
And then there’s Daniel, he’s only 23 I was 3 years older when I had Nico and I still wasn’t ready. How can I expect him to be a father? I won’t even let him tell his family we’re together and it’s been almost a year...and now what? We’re just gonna show up, tell them we’re together and hope that one of the most influential families in New York welcomes me and their bastard grandchild with open arms? Please...this isn’t a John Hughes movie.
I know I’m being unfair, Daniel would rise to it, I know he would. Making all the promises you’re supposed to...God, the sentimental idiot would probably want me to marry him. He’d sit with the big book of baby names, we’d argue over whether it would be Slater or Meade, he’d go to the store for Ice Cream at 3am. He’d dote on this child no matter what his parents said or did...he’d throw his life away.
Which is why I ended it, I picked some stupid fight when he tried to convince me to at least tell Alex about us and I flipped. Told him he was immature, too young to have a serious relationship and sent him off to fashion week with Alex in Paris. He landed about 3am this morning and I’ve been avoiding his calls ever since. He’ll get over it, Alex will remind him what the life of a Playboy should be and he’ll thank his lucky stars he’s not trapped in a grown up relationship. And he’ll never need to know I was carrying his baby.
‘Oh God...Willie.’
Marc looked up at his boss, Wilhelmina titled her head and quirked her eyebrow.
‘What Marc, not the ending you were hoping for? What were you hoping for?’
‘I...I wasn’t...’
‘Oh come on Marc, you’ve seen how we are now, how did you think it would end? You just wanted to learn my big bad secret. I suppose I should be proud, really.’ She laughed mirthlessly.
Betty stared at the carpet at her feet. She didn’t want to know this, she didn’t want any part of it and she certainly didn’t want to admit to her boss that she could see why Wilhelmina had done what she did.
Now that the secret was out, at least within these four walls, Willie felt her old self coming back. Daniel felt his anger subsiding and Marc and Betty wanted the ground to swallow them.
‘One question.’ Daniel spoke softly.
All three looked at him expectantly.
‘Why did you come to Paris?’
‘What?’ Willie asked him.
‘You came to Paris, we talked. We were back together and then you left again. Why?’
‘Does it matter?’
‘It does to me.’
Marc and Betty suddenly realised that Daniel and Wilhelmina no longer noticed that they were in the room. Their eyes were holding only each other.
‘I don’t know.’ Wilhelmina answered him.
‘Oh come on Wilhelmina, you don’t do anything without a reason.’
She shook her head. ‘You know what Daniel; you’ve shared enough of my secrets for one night. How ‘bout you let me keep this one a little longer.’
‘No...I.’
‘What does it matter Daniel? Do you really think we’d still be together if I hadn’t ended it or if the baby had been born? You think me, you and 2,4 kids would be part of the equation now?! No of course not. So let it go.’
She turned to leave and expected Daniel to charge up and stop her or call her back, part of her hoped he would. Before she realised it she was at the elevator and he hadn’t stopped her leaving, just like in Paris.
xXx
Letting herself into her apartment, Willie felt all the tension of the last 24 hours start to drain from her. Ignoring the call of the chilled Chablis in her fridge she walked straight to her bedroom and opened the closet. Reaching into the back she pulled out the box that had contained her Diaries and saw they were all gone. Reaching between the fold of one of the soft baby blankets she let out a sigh of relief as she felt the worn envelope still concealed in there. Leaning back against the wall her heart jumped as she heard a knock at her front door.
Getting up she found herself hoping it was Daniel as she walked towards the door. Looking through the peephole she saw a very down trodden Marc St James peering back at her. She opened the door walked away leaving it open for him to follow.
Marc walked in and closed the door behind him. He followed her into the kitchen where she was decanting the wine into two large goblets. She handed one to Marc in silence and then walked back to her closet. Marc was close behind her, bewildered as to why she wasn’t ripping his head off or barbequing his organs. He was probably more scared of her now than he was when he thought she had been trying to kill him.
She sat down in her closet in the same space he had when he had first discovered her diaries. He sat down opposite her and immediately launched into a tirade of apologies. ‘Willie I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.’
‘Enough Marc. I don’t want your apologies. It’s done, and like I said, I guess I should be proud.’
‘I want you to know, I never went to Daniel, neither did Betty. It all just got out of hand.’
Ignoring him, she ran her finger round the rim of her wine glass. She nodded to the box between them. ‘I take it you saw these then’, gesturing the baby blankets.
‘Yeah...Nicos?’
She shook her head. ‘No, not Nico’s. I was going to have the baby, Marc. I went to Paris to tell Daniel, I bought these at some overpriced baby boutique on my way to the hotel.’
‘Why didn’t you?’
Wilhelmina sat her glass down and reached for the top most blanket; reaching in between the fold once again she pulled out the much worn envelope. She handed it to Marc who looked at it and gasped.
There on the envelope was one word written in Wilhelmina’s handwriting.
Daniel
‘I guess you didn’t snoop hard enough, Nancy Drew.’
Author - QueenWillie
Pairing - Danie/Wilhelmina
Disclaimer - Don't own 'em, never will.
Summary - Can all this animosity really just be over a job.
Beta - The Fab Dardeile
Chapter 8
‘Questions like; just when where you going to tell me you got rid of my child?’
Wilhelmina felt hot and cold all at once; she felt her breath coming in short rasps as her panic began to rise. She felt the wave of nausea hit her and her heart quicken. She wanted to scream at him but thought she might vomit if she opened her mouth. Daniel continued to stare at her, enjoying her discomfort and waiting for her answer. Well, he had a long wait ahead of him.
Daniel couldn’t help but notice the close proximity of their bodies and unbidden images of last night came to him. The way she had felt moving against him, the taste of her skin. The sound of her voice as she called his name. Images that this morning would have caused his body to crave her now only made his stomach churn in the wake of this revelation.
Trying her hardest to steady her breathing she used all the strength she could find and tried to remove his vice-like grip trapping her in her chair. He wouldn’t be moved; he leaned in closer and whispered in her face. ‘Answer me.’
When she didn’t respond he bellowed at her. ‘Answer me!’
Even if she had wanted to, in that moment there was no way she could. She had never seen him like this before. His eyes were huge and dark, his teeth partially bared and she could literally feel the heat of his anger. His hands were spasmodically tightening round the arms of her chair and she guessed he was using all his control not to wrap them round her neck and apply the same pressure. She let out a huge breath she didn’t know she was holding when she heard voices coming from the door of her office.
‘Daniel!’ Willie recognised the high pitch of Betty’s voice.
‘Stay out of this Betty.’
‘Get away from her.’ It was Marc, sounding much braver than he felt.
Daniel chuckled and turned his head slightly to look at the other man. ‘Or what Marc, we’re going to meet at the flagpole at 4?’
Using his brief distraction to her advantage, Wilhelmina dug her nails into his hand making him retract them in pain. Pushing him to the side she bolted from the chair. Daniel realised his mistake and made a grab for her but Marc and Betty were too quick and stood between the pair like some bizarre piggy in the middle.
‘Daniel, what the hell!?’ Betty shouted at him.
‘We’re not through here ‘til I get my answer.’
‘What answer?’ asked Marc.
Looking over their heads Daniel saw Wilhelmina shake her head almost imperceptibly, her eyes pleading that he didn’t tell them what those pages contained. Seeing this, he laughed.
‘Oh you don’t want me to tell? Well that’s hardly fair; after all they’ve been Shaggy and Velma to my Fred all through this little mystery.’
The air seemed to change around them as Daniels words hung in the air. Marc had his back to Wilhelmina and was loathe to turn and face her. Biting the bullet, he turned slowly and found Wilhelmina looking at him with a look he had only seen when Connor had left, broken, defeated and it was worse than any punishment he had previously imagined, knowing this look was directed at him.
‘Willie I...’
‘No’ It was barley a whisper but it stopped Marc in his tracks. Wilhelmina walked around him to her desk in the office which no longer felt like hers. Keeping one eye on Daniel she reached for the book he had discarded there. She walked back to Marc and thrust it against his chest.
‘Read it.’ Her voice was still a murmur.
Marc shook his head, ‘I don’t want to.’
She pushed it firmer into his chest. ‘Don’t start something you can’t finish!’ Her voice was gaining strength now. ‘Read it...now. Oh, you too Velma.’
Marc swallowed and began to read the entry that had been smudged with Daniel’s tears and fingerprints.
February 23rd 1995
This is the sixth morning in a row I’ve been praying to the porcelain God. I’ve been ignoring the symptoms, hoping it will go away when I know it won’t. I can’t do this, we can’t do this. Fey already hates the fact that I have one child splitting my attention from the magazine. It’s all Mode with her, she handed her own baby to her accountant without a moments’ hesitation because she didn’t want a child in the way of her career.
And then there’s Daniel, he’s only 23 I was 3 years older when I had Nico and I still wasn’t ready. How can I expect him to be a father? I won’t even let him tell his family we’re together and it’s been almost a year...and now what? We’re just gonna show up, tell them we’re together and hope that one of the most influential families in New York welcomes me and their bastard grandchild with open arms? Please...this isn’t a John Hughes movie.
I know I’m being unfair, Daniel would rise to it, I know he would. Making all the promises you’re supposed to...God, the sentimental idiot would probably want me to marry him. He’d sit with the big book of baby names, we’d argue over whether it would be Slater or Meade, he’d go to the store for Ice Cream at 3am. He’d dote on this child no matter what his parents said or did...he’d throw his life away.
Which is why I ended it, I picked some stupid fight when he tried to convince me to at least tell Alex about us and I flipped. Told him he was immature, too young to have a serious relationship and sent him off to fashion week with Alex in Paris. He landed about 3am this morning and I’ve been avoiding his calls ever since. He’ll get over it, Alex will remind him what the life of a Playboy should be and he’ll thank his lucky stars he’s not trapped in a grown up relationship. And he’ll never need to know I was carrying his baby.
‘Oh God...Willie.’
Marc looked up at his boss, Wilhelmina titled her head and quirked her eyebrow.
‘What Marc, not the ending you were hoping for? What were you hoping for?’
‘I...I wasn’t...’
‘Oh come on Marc, you’ve seen how we are now, how did you think it would end? You just wanted to learn my big bad secret. I suppose I should be proud, really.’ She laughed mirthlessly.
Betty stared at the carpet at her feet. She didn’t want to know this, she didn’t want any part of it and she certainly didn’t want to admit to her boss that she could see why Wilhelmina had done what she did.
Now that the secret was out, at least within these four walls, Willie felt her old self coming back. Daniel felt his anger subsiding and Marc and Betty wanted the ground to swallow them.
‘One question.’ Daniel spoke softly.
All three looked at him expectantly.
‘Why did you come to Paris?’
‘What?’ Willie asked him.
‘You came to Paris, we talked. We were back together and then you left again. Why?’
‘Does it matter?’
‘It does to me.’
Marc and Betty suddenly realised that Daniel and Wilhelmina no longer noticed that they were in the room. Their eyes were holding only each other.
‘I don’t know.’ Wilhelmina answered him.
‘Oh come on Wilhelmina, you don’t do anything without a reason.’
She shook her head. ‘You know what Daniel; you’ve shared enough of my secrets for one night. How ‘bout you let me keep this one a little longer.’
‘No...I.’
‘What does it matter Daniel? Do you really think we’d still be together if I hadn’t ended it or if the baby had been born? You think me, you and 2,4 kids would be part of the equation now?! No of course not. So let it go.’
She turned to leave and expected Daniel to charge up and stop her or call her back, part of her hoped he would. Before she realised it she was at the elevator and he hadn’t stopped her leaving, just like in Paris.
xXx
Letting herself into her apartment, Willie felt all the tension of the last 24 hours start to drain from her. Ignoring the call of the chilled Chablis in her fridge she walked straight to her bedroom and opened the closet. Reaching into the back she pulled out the box that had contained her Diaries and saw they were all gone. Reaching between the fold of one of the soft baby blankets she let out a sigh of relief as she felt the worn envelope still concealed in there. Leaning back against the wall her heart jumped as she heard a knock at her front door.
Getting up she found herself hoping it was Daniel as she walked towards the door. Looking through the peephole she saw a very down trodden Marc St James peering back at her. She opened the door walked away leaving it open for him to follow.
Marc walked in and closed the door behind him. He followed her into the kitchen where she was decanting the wine into two large goblets. She handed one to Marc in silence and then walked back to her closet. Marc was close behind her, bewildered as to why she wasn’t ripping his head off or barbequing his organs. He was probably more scared of her now than he was when he thought she had been trying to kill him.
She sat down in her closet in the same space he had when he had first discovered her diaries. He sat down opposite her and immediately launched into a tirade of apologies. ‘Willie I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.’
‘Enough Marc. I don’t want your apologies. It’s done, and like I said, I guess I should be proud.’
‘I want you to know, I never went to Daniel, neither did Betty. It all just got out of hand.’
Ignoring him, she ran her finger round the rim of her wine glass. She nodded to the box between them. ‘I take it you saw these then’, gesturing the baby blankets.
‘Yeah...Nicos?’
She shook her head. ‘No, not Nico’s. I was going to have the baby, Marc. I went to Paris to tell Daniel, I bought these at some overpriced baby boutique on my way to the hotel.’
‘Why didn’t you?’
Wilhelmina sat her glass down and reached for the top most blanket; reaching in between the fold once again she pulled out the much worn envelope. She handed it to Marc who looked at it and gasped.
There on the envelope was one word written in Wilhelmina’s handwriting.
Daniel
‘I guess you didn’t snoop hard enough, Nancy Drew.’