One Day At A Time
“Joe!” Nick screeched as he jumped onto his brother who was relaxing on the sofa, feet up on the sofa.
Joe glared at his ten year old brother. “What?” He asked bitterly. Couldn't he just sit down for a moment and enjoy what he wanted on television without his precious baby brother wanting something.
“Kevin had his tongue in a girls mouth!” Nick shivered in disgust, and Joe just laughed.
“That's his girlfriend.” Joe smiled. “When you're old enough to notice girls you'll be putting your tongue in their mouths too.”
“No!” Nick said defiantly. “Girls are icky.”
“Icky?” Joe laughed.
“Are you not old enough to notice girls then?” Nick asked as he turned his head to stare at his brother.
“I notice girls.” Joe said using the same tone as his baby brother.
“Have you ever kissed a girl?” Nick asked in awe.
“Yeah. Loads.” Joe grinned. “Jealous?” Nick nodded.
“Was it icky?” Nick asked.
“No it wasn't icky.” Joe smiled, he thought that was the end of this rather weird conversation but his brother started to speak again, asking questions only a curious ten year old could possibly think of.
“What's it like having a girlfriend?”
“It's nice.” Joe smiled.
“But what do you do?” Nick sighed. “Do you watch football?”
“If the girl likes football you can.”
“But girls don't like football!” Nick exclaimed. “What do you do if the girl doesn't like football?”
“Talk.”
“Talk?” Nick asked with a smile. “Like we are now.”
“Yeah, only it will have more meaning.”
“Stuff I say doesn't have meaning?” Nick asked hurt.
“No... well... darn you know what I mean.” Joe laughed. “When you have a girlfriend you want to spend all your time with them, they're all you can think about.”
“I like spending time with you.” Nick said crushing his eye brows forward. “And I think about you.”
“You do?” Joe asked.
“Yeah. You're my favourite brother.” Nick smiled.
“Whys that?”
“Because Frankie cries a lot.” Nick smiled. “And Kevin puts his tongue in girls mouths. But you don't do either. And I don't want you to put your tongue in girls mouths because that's icky, and you're not icky.”
Joe stared up at the ceiling as the memories of his childhood flooded back. He didn't understand why these memories were floating around in his head, they were weird and he thought he couldn't remember them clearly before, but now it was like he was thirteen again and Nick was telling him he wasn't icky like Kevin.
He felt his eyes water and he wondered why he was crying. He knew it wasn't because Nick was gay. It was because of Gareth. Because Nick had someone who wasn't him. Nick was downstairs doing god knows what to someone that wasn't him and he hated it.
“Joe where are you going?” Nick asked, he stood in the hall way, bare foot wearing only his pyjama bottoms.
“On a date.” Joe grinned. “How do I look?”
“Fine.” Nick mumbled.
“Don't worry Nicky one day you'll be old enough to go on dates.”
“Maybe I don't want to go on dates!” Nick snapped.
“Wow. What's wrong with you?” Joe laughed.
“Nothing. You're late for your date!” With that Nick stormed his way up to his bedroom slamming the door shut.
Joe frowned. Something was wrong with his baby brother. He had been acting weird for ages, he pulled out his phone sent a quick text and then shrugged his jacket back off and headed upstairs.
“Nicky.” Joe called through the door.
“Piss off.” Nick called back. Joe opened the door, Nick didn't swear. He walked in and saw his brother sat on the bed, book in his lap.
“What's up?”
“The sky.”
“Oh how original.” Joe laughed and sat next to him. “What you reading?”
“Great expectations.”
“Any good?”
“I guess.” Nick sighed. “What are you doing Joe?”
“Talking to my baby brother about a really boring book.” Joe smiled.
“You should be on a date right now.”
“You needed me.” Joe smiled. “Fancy watching a film and sharing a pizza?”
“Okay.” Nick smiled. “Thanks.”
“Any time.”
Joe glared at the ceiling now. His mind was playing horrible tricks on him and he hated it. Nothing made sense any more!
-x-
Nick smiled as Gareth opened the door, he walked in quickly glad that his mum had got Gareth his own room. They smiled at each other before Gareth pulled him in for a soft kiss. “Did I mention how glad I am you came?” Nick asked as he wrapped his arms around Gareth's waist.
“Once or twice.” Gareth smiled as he kissed Nick again.
“I'm really glad you're here.” Nick smiled.
Nick leaned up and kissed Gareth softly. They kissed for hours, standing in the middle of a hotel room enjoying the moment and just being with each other. Gareth took Nick's hand and led him to the bed.
“I...”
“Nick don't be silly.” Gareth smiled. “We're not going to do anything.” He promised.
“We're not?” Nick asked.
“No.” Gareth smiled, he played with a strand of Nick's curly hair and smiled. “You're really hot when you're blushing.”
“I just thought...”
“Nick you're waiting till your married.” Gareth grinned.
“But you...”
“I'm not ready to do that.” Gareth smiled. “I'm just happy holding you for a little while longer.”
“I'm just happy to be held.” Nick smiled.
-x-
Joe wasn't too sure what time his mind let him get some much needed sleep. But he knew he had slept through the night peacefully and when he woke up at nine he knew Nick hadn't come back last night. He glared at the empty bed next to him.
He showered and got dressed quickly not bothering about his looks or even his hair, his heart was thumping angrily in his chest. He opened the door and stormed into Kevin's room. Kevin and Dougie were fooling around on the guitars.
“Dude you look rough.” Dougie joked. “Rough night?”
“He left!” Joe yelled. “Middle of the night, he went to see him!”
“So?” Kevin asked more than a little confused.
“He had sex!” Joe shouted. “With him!”
“Wait he did?” Kevin blinked. “Nicky wouldn't...”
There was a knock at the door and Dougie answered it, Gareth and Nick were standing there both smiling at each other.
“Hey... is Joe...” Nick said and then noticed his brother standing in the middle of the room glaring at him. “Everything okay?”
“No it fucking isn't!” Joe screamed.
“What's going on?” Nick asked.
“Hey Gareth... why don't you and me go get some breakfast.” Dougie said.
“Erm okay.” Gareth said awkwardly. He pecked Nick on the cheek and was then pulled away.
“Okay so what's going on?” Nick asked completely confused.
“You had sex.” Joe shouted. “How could you? Do you drop your trousers for any one who smiles at you? Or is Gareth just that important that you go against everything you stand for...”
“I didn't have sex!” Nick yelled. “How dare you Joe!”
“Nick calm down...” Kevin said softly, it wasn't good for Nick to be this upset.
“No you believe him don't you?” Nick yelled at Kevin now. “You know what fuck you. I only came in here for the key card.” Nick said and grabbed it from where Joe left it on the side.
“Nick wait...” Kevin pleaded.
“No! Just leave me alone.” Nick walked out of the room slamming the door behind him. When he got into his room he collapsed on the bed and cried harder then he had ever cried in his life.