Switching Out of Reverse
Seeing as how I might be starting a new job soon, there are some details I ought to get in order:
Flip my schedule so I can get up in the AM and still function in the frontal lobe.
Channel my Felix Unger alter ego and clean up the pad. Long term unemployment will make anyone a slob.
Buy some new work shoes. The old ones have enough fryer grease ground in them to fuel a small car.
I'll have to work out. My arms have developed atrophy in the six months I haven't been working. I wonder if I can still lift a knife.
Get that damn wisdom tooth pulled. It'd be free with my insurance... I'm just being lame.
Send out holiday cards. I won't have time when the xmas season starts, so I'll just write on them, "Open in December".
Call all my friends and ask them to remember me fondly.
Make an extravagant shopping list for all that fat money I'm going to be making.
Burn one last wood fire outside and sacrifice my SR baseball cap and T-shirts, and all my past-job memorabilia. Why do they give me that shit anyway? I'll keep the mugs (ceramic won't burn anyway).
The truth is that with all pros and cons in consideration, I can't wait to go back to work. Any work.
*Side note: The executive chef I'd be working under just came aboard. He's starting a new menu today, far more upscale, Italian cuisine. According to him, our biggest challenge will be trying to teach the union employees how to cook real classic-style food, and ease their fear of it. At least he's aware and empathetic to the human factor. My last boss would make fun of employees for not pronouncing French terms properly, so I publicly made fun of him for not knowing how to spell them. :)
He wrote 'bur blank' on the wall in pencil as a snide reminder. I crossed it out and wrote, "Beurre Blanc! ...you moron." I wonder how I lost that job?
The truth is that with all pros and cons in consideration, I can't wait to go back to work. Any work.
*Side note: The executive chef I'd be working under just came aboard. He's starting a new menu today, far more upscale, Italian cuisine. According to him, our biggest challenge will be trying to teach the union employees how to cook real classic-style food, and ease their fear of it. At least he's aware and empathetic to the human factor. My last boss would make fun of employees for not pronouncing French terms properly, so I publicly made fun of him for not knowing how to spell them. :)
He wrote 'bur blank' on the wall in pencil as a snide reminder. I crossed it out and wrote, "Beurre Blanc! ...you moron." I wonder how I lost that job?