(no subject)
There's been another two deaths. I can't help but notice they were the nuttiest of the nuts. First Betty, then this guy they kept in a straight jacket type thing 24-7 so he wouldn't claw his eyes out. (or so I'm told) He ranted and raved when he was awake. He scared me. Literally, chilled to the bone scared me. This could possibly be because some of what he said made sense. I'm not even getting into it, but I think he's a visionary.
Is that going to happen to me one day?
I don't want to think about this. Either way he liked to try to tear his eyeballs out when he was given half a chance, and he was found all peacefully dead with those same words on the wall above him. 'Free now.' Same thing with the other, a real piece of work. He cried all the time, saying that there were things under his skin. Constant sobbing, I don't know how he didn't dehydrate himself. He's not crying anymore. He even had this disturbing little smile on his face.
What have I learned? That she's going after the worst cases here. That she isn't discriminating between males or females. That she knows I'm following her.
Yeah that part came the other night when I woke up from a vision hitting me. Oh yes, how could I forget? Another bad thing about being me lately? Not only am I in the looney bin, but I keep getting hit with visions, and the extra crazy vibe in the air is getting to them. That's all I can say about them. They're nuts. They're all jumbled. I see Angel somewhere...just flat out weird. I can't even begin to tell where. Giles...in a cowboy hat? That's gotta be someone's freaky idea of a joke. I saw Willow all naked...Gunn was somewhere around...and I'm not even going in to what that's about. I saw Oz ripping some guy's throat out...none of it makes sense though. It's all brief flashes and none of it connects. I don't get any context, no sense of place or anything else. It's the acid trip version of a flip book. Stupid, unhelpful, and disturbing. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I don't wanna end up being 'free now' too.
Wait a second, I was going somewhere with this. See? I'm already losing focus. Maybe it's the constant screaming. I woke up from yet another 'Cordy, these are your friends on acid' visions, and she was there. She was off in the corner, crouched down sort of like an animal, just watching. It's weird. She wasn't in vampface, and she didn't seem threatening. She was more just...curious? I didn't feel threatened at all, which, with a vampire who I know has killed three people already...again with the this whole thing being nuts. She didn't say anything to me, we just stared at each other for a little while, then she waved, and was gone. I have no idea where she went. I guess I should feel vulnerable now...but I just don't think she'll hurt me. I know how insane that is.
Whoever says crazy isn't catchy hasn't spent nearly enough time with the loons of the world.
Is that going to happen to me one day?
I don't want to think about this. Either way he liked to try to tear his eyeballs out when he was given half a chance, and he was found all peacefully dead with those same words on the wall above him. 'Free now.' Same thing with the other, a real piece of work. He cried all the time, saying that there were things under his skin. Constant sobbing, I don't know how he didn't dehydrate himself. He's not crying anymore. He even had this disturbing little smile on his face.
What have I learned? That she's going after the worst cases here. That she isn't discriminating between males or females. That she knows I'm following her.
Yeah that part came the other night when I woke up from a vision hitting me. Oh yes, how could I forget? Another bad thing about being me lately? Not only am I in the looney bin, but I keep getting hit with visions, and the extra crazy vibe in the air is getting to them. That's all I can say about them. They're nuts. They're all jumbled. I see Angel somewhere...just flat out weird. I can't even begin to tell where. Giles...in a cowboy hat? That's gotta be someone's freaky idea of a joke. I saw Willow all naked...Gunn was somewhere around...and I'm not even going in to what that's about. I saw Oz ripping some guy's throat out...none of it makes sense though. It's all brief flashes and none of it connects. I don't get any context, no sense of place or anything else. It's the acid trip version of a flip book. Stupid, unhelpful, and disturbing. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I don't wanna end up being 'free now' too.
Wait a second, I was going somewhere with this. See? I'm already losing focus. Maybe it's the constant screaming. I woke up from yet another 'Cordy, these are your friends on acid' visions, and she was there. She was off in the corner, crouched down sort of like an animal, just watching. It's weird. She wasn't in vampface, and she didn't seem threatening. She was more just...curious? I didn't feel threatened at all, which, with a vampire who I know has killed three people already...again with the this whole thing being nuts. She didn't say anything to me, we just stared at each other for a little while, then she waved, and was gone. I have no idea where she went. I guess I should feel vulnerable now...but I just don't think she'll hurt me. I know how insane that is.
Whoever says crazy isn't catchy hasn't spent nearly enough time with the loons of the world.