I feel the need to be pumped full of drugs and alcohal
I feel sad. Again.
You wanna know why? I have a reason this time, really.
I feel like a coward for hiding from my mom. I'm not myself around her. I love it when she says she knows who I am, but all she knows is what she reads in her fucking astrology charts. She reads my "future." Intruder. Keep your nose out of my life. If you feel the need to read about me, then you don't really know me do you?
She's spotted my hidden septum ring a few times now. Says, "you've got something up your nose. Clean it." I tell her to "leave me alone, no one else notices anything." So she replies, "If I can see it everyone else can too." Excuse me BITCH, but no one positions themselves at an awkward angle behind me and stares at my fucking face. Plus she's shorter than me, that makes it easier to see up my nose.
I get into the same dilemma over and over again whenever I live with her. Oh, she cut my hair really short which was a surprise. It was only after she found out that I wouldn't have it in that same punkish style as before. I wanted it like Keira Knightley's hair in Domino. Turns out mine doesn't look anything like that. AT ALL. I feel like I got an old lady short cut and it's really fucking annoying. She did and good job but it's not what I wanted. And she keeps pushing that I should keep my natural hair color because it looks "best" on me. I'll dye my fucking hair if I want to you whore. FUCK.
I hate that she pushes me so much into what she wants. It'll never happen. EVER. I'm seriously thinking about just walking downstairs one day like, "look, this is me and that's all there is to it. If you can't handle that, I'm moving out. Fuck our agreement on paying off my car." I'm really rethinking just getting an apartment with Shelby or something in the future but... FUCK my stupid fucking car is so crippling! And everyone tells me just sell it but I've already put so much money into it and there's no way that I'd be able to get as much for it as I'd need. I'd still be paying off at least half my loan for a car I would no longer own. Besides, I don't even know where the title is... which is really bad.
F.M.L.
The only good thing I have going for me now is work. But that's about it.
I feel all lonely and shit again. All those who are a love interest live somewhere else. Another state... another country... whatever wherever, they're not here. None of them are here. Nor do I hear from them. I can't help but feel resentful and... neglected. Yes, there's the word, neglected. Until I find a guy that doesn't neglect me while I'm away, that's the one I'll take. It seems like they all just quit talking to me until I come back into town and then they're all over me. It's confusing, I mean, do you really like me or do you just want to get laid? Am I convenient for you or what??? Do you actually CARE??? I'D LOVE TO FUCKING KNOW!!! >:( >:( >:( BECAUSE LET ME TELL YOU, DON'T EXPECT ME TO STAY SINGLE FOR YOU FOREVER!!! I'VE TRIED TALKING TO YOU, I'VE TRIED TEXTING AND MAILING AND NONE OF IT WORKS, YOU JUST IGNORE ME, I'M FUCKING TIRED OF BEING IGNORED! LIAR, FALSE, YOU'RE ALL FUCKING FALSE!!! .... .... .... Fuck you all.
Yes... I am angry.
The End.
EDIT: Actually, I know a nice guy in Brazil... and maybe one in CDA and one in New York. I'd like to have one near by, you know, in Utah? Because them being a million miles away doesn't work for me. I need cuddles and loves damnit! Anyone know any nice guys that are single and near my area code???
You wanna know why? I have a reason this time, really.
I feel like a coward for hiding from my mom. I'm not myself around her. I love it when she says she knows who I am, but all she knows is what she reads in her fucking astrology charts. She reads my "future." Intruder. Keep your nose out of my life. If you feel the need to read about me, then you don't really know me do you?
She's spotted my hidden septum ring a few times now. Says, "you've got something up your nose. Clean it." I tell her to "leave me alone, no one else notices anything." So she replies, "If I can see it everyone else can too." Excuse me BITCH, but no one positions themselves at an awkward angle behind me and stares at my fucking face. Plus she's shorter than me, that makes it easier to see up my nose.
I get into the same dilemma over and over again whenever I live with her. Oh, she cut my hair really short which was a surprise. It was only after she found out that I wouldn't have it in that same punkish style as before. I wanted it like Keira Knightley's hair in Domino. Turns out mine doesn't look anything like that. AT ALL. I feel like I got an old lady short cut and it's really fucking annoying. She did and good job but it's not what I wanted. And she keeps pushing that I should keep my natural hair color because it looks "best" on me. I'll dye my fucking hair if I want to you whore. FUCK.
I hate that she pushes me so much into what she wants. It'll never happen. EVER. I'm seriously thinking about just walking downstairs one day like, "look, this is me and that's all there is to it. If you can't handle that, I'm moving out. Fuck our agreement on paying off my car." I'm really rethinking just getting an apartment with Shelby or something in the future but... FUCK my stupid fucking car is so crippling! And everyone tells me just sell it but I've already put so much money into it and there's no way that I'd be able to get as much for it as I'd need. I'd still be paying off at least half my loan for a car I would no longer own. Besides, I don't even know where the title is... which is really bad.
F.M.L.
The only good thing I have going for me now is work. But that's about it.
I feel all lonely and shit again. All those who are a love interest live somewhere else. Another state... another country... whatever wherever, they're not here. None of them are here. Nor do I hear from them. I can't help but feel resentful and... neglected. Yes, there's the word, neglected. Until I find a guy that doesn't neglect me while I'm away, that's the one I'll take. It seems like they all just quit talking to me until I come back into town and then they're all over me. It's confusing, I mean, do you really like me or do you just want to get laid? Am I convenient for you or what??? Do you actually CARE??? I'D LOVE TO FUCKING KNOW!!! >:( >:( >:( BECAUSE LET ME TELL YOU, DON'T EXPECT ME TO STAY SINGLE FOR YOU FOREVER!!! I'VE TRIED TALKING TO YOU, I'VE TRIED TEXTING AND MAILING AND NONE OF IT WORKS, YOU JUST IGNORE ME, I'M FUCKING TIRED OF BEING IGNORED! LIAR, FALSE, YOU'RE ALL FUCKING FALSE!!! .... .... .... Fuck you all.
Yes... I am angry.
The End.
EDIT: Actually, I know a nice guy in Brazil... and maybe one in CDA and one in New York. I'd like to have one near by, you know, in Utah? Because them being a million miles away doesn't work for me. I need cuddles and loves damnit! Anyone know any nice guys that are single and near my area code???