[Fic] A Red Thread and Crystal Tears
Title: A Red Thread and Crystal Tears
Author: queen_kat-tun
Pairing: Akame
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst, Romance, Fluff (for now)
Disclaimer: Akanishi Jin and Kamenashi Kazuya owe me. They’ll pay for it with their lives. Okay, their bodies are enough payment… >.< *shot*
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Chapter 11-C
"No! I don't!" he answered in an instant. "I won't ever regret that I chose to love him. I love him too much...that I didn't even realize that I gave him the right to break my heart..." his words ended in a whisper.
"Do you mind telling me what happened?" Miyuki urged for Kazuya to go on.
Kazuya looked hesitant but after a minute, he managed to open up. "The night I begged him to try again, he...he asked me to set him free; give him his freedom back. He wanted me to let go because he said...he no longer loved me. I didn't grant him his request." his voice shook a bit.
"What did he say?" Miyuki grew curious.
"Nothing. He must have gotten tired of my desperation and the next thing I knew was that he was already introducing his girlfriend to the group. I caved in to my emotions and broke down the moment I've arrived home. Honestly, I still wouldn't have set him free but I saw how happy he was when he's with her. It nagged me because I was being selfish. He wanted me to let him go. He wanted to be happy like the way he wished for me to be."
"And what did you do?"
Swallowing thickly, Kazuya said, "After some time, I returned to him the one thing I held special more than my life. I never said a word but I know that he knew what I meant with that act. It was painful...and I'm still hurting." a bitter smile graced Kazuya's face.
Miyuki felt her heart clenching when he saw the man made a move to wipe the moisture that had formed in Kazuya's eyes. "What did he do after you gave the thing back?" she asked. Kazuya should know how to face reality...even if it hurts so badly.
Learning to accept is the only way he'd survive the heartache.
"I don't know. I never saw him again after that day. Things got messed up and I had an accident. Sometimes, I feel like I just don't want to care anymore."
"But you love him."
"I never stopped loving him. I think I never will..." came Kazuya's sincere answer.
"Miyuki-san, you asked me if I did regret loving him, right?" the woman nodded, looked at him curiously.
Kazuya seemed distant; somehow he'd managed to build a wall in a short time. It was as if he was protecting himself from all the hurt. "During my stay here, I realized I did the right thing. He has no future with me. We don't belong together. He told me that everything we had was because of naìvety and impulse, that we were young and what we had should have never occurred. My only regret was..." the man paused, his chest rose when he took in a deep breath. "My only regret was the fact that I refused to give him his freedom a little too late..."
"What do you mean?"
"If I had given him his freedom sooner, he would have settled with a girl the earliest time possible and save me the trouble of a million heartaches whenever I hear him talking about some random woman he met at a club somewhere. I hated the fact that he's playing around, toying with people's hearts. Somewhere inside me, I think I wanted him to commit first before I let him go completely; to be secured with the idea that someone will take care of him." tears started to roll down the man's cheeks and Miyuki wanted to blame herself for bringing the subject up.
"Kazuya..."
"And yet, I hated myself because I hoped he'd never find someone to settle with. I wished for us to be together again. I was selfish! Too selfish that I had hurt him in the process. He never told me, but I knew I did. When I finally found the courage to let him go, I found myself accepting Yuna for him. I realized she'd do a better job of taking care of him since he no longer wanted me to have anything to do with his life. It was painful to accept defeat but I know that that's what I had to do." Kazuya continued on wiping his tears away, the wound in his heart seemed to grow bigger and more painful with its every beat.
"Fate is a cruel enemy, Kazuya. Things happen for a reason. That may be an overused cliché but it's how life goes. You did the right thing and I wish you to find happiness soon. Akanishi-san...I hope he knew what he had asked for."
Kazuya looked at Miyuki in an instant, his puffy eyes wide in surprise. "How did...?"
Miyuki smiled gently. "How did I know that it was Akanishi you're talking about? You two were inseparable since your teens plus the fact that I live in the same country where rumours sell like hot pancakes and with your story, it wasn't hard to put two and two together. You're famous. Unfortunately, being famous has a price to pay."
"Right." Kazuya sounded defeated.
"True love only comes once in a lifetime. I've lost mine but you can still have yours. But know that you have to choose between loving in silence while he's happy with someone else or fight for that love. It doesn't matter who gets hurt or not. Hurt is still love, only in a different spelling. It's just a matter of whose hearts understand each other best. I'm sure you and Akanishi are already synched in more ways than one."
Kazuya shook his head gently. "I've already let go. He was the first one to give up on us. All I really want now is to move on. Life has more to offer and holding on to my past won't help me move forward. Besides, he's happy and to me, that is all that matters because Jin is special to me. I'd given him what he wanted. Even though it hurts me, at least, I know I have paved a way for him to have his happiness."
"Then what about your love?"
"Moving on doesn't have to mean that I should stop loving him. I'm just giving way to the person Jin had chosen to make him happy."
"You've mentioned a girl's name earlier...Yuna...? Who's she?" Miyuki wanted to know.
"She's the one on the other end of his red thread." Kazuya smiled a little.
"Does it mean that you no longer need this?" Miyuki got something from her pocket and gave Kazuya a simple red bracelet.
"Oh, you know about this?" Kazuya asked, his fingers tracing the lines of his bracelet.
"Apparently, yes, I know about the bracelet and the necklace of destiny; whatever they call it." she rolled her eyes, as if the things she'd mentioned sounded so absurd.
"I used to wear this every single day, hoping for Jin to be my destiny. Unfortunately, Fate had forgotten to tie mine with Jin's thread." the young man let out a bitter chuckle. "Thanks for keeping this but no, I don't need this anymore, Miyuki-san. Can I borrow a pair of scissors?" he asked.
A frown creased Miyuki's forehead. "What for?"
Kazuya shrugged his shoulders. "To cut whatever ties I have with him. He has the necklace. If I cut my bracelet, then it would put an end to whatever crap they had said about the accessories, right? It's not like they work to begin with."
Miyuki shook her head. "No, Kazuya. Let me keep it for you, okay? That way, we'll know if these things are really a part of one's red thread."
"That's childish." Kazuya whined as he gave the bracelet back to Miyuki-san.
Miyuki chuckled, ruffled Kazuya's hair playfully. "It was you who bought it in the first place."
"Whatever." Kazuya snorted. "Well, it has been nice chatting with you, Miyuki-san, but I think I'd like to rest now. Thinking of Jin made me have a huge headache." Kazuya teased, trying to lighten the mood.
"You smiled. He made you smile by just thinking of him earlier." Miyuki took notice. It would be nice if Kazuya can always smile.
"He always does, Miyuki-san. Always." Kazuya answered truthfully and stood up.
She looked up to Kazuya while remaining seated in her place. "What if he still loves you and he's just being a coward because he's blaming himself for that issue that caused you two to break up?"
Kazuya stopped walking for a while. "Trust me. He no longer loves me."
"But what if you're wrong?" she insisted.
Kazuya looked at Miyuki, a smile graced his lips. "If I am wrong, then I'd go to him myself and get him back. Then we'll kiss and hug and whisper sweet nothings to each other after we make love."
"Not sex?" Miyuki grinned, finding it in her heart that she wanted Kazuya to have his happy ending.
"We're in love, so it's not going to be sex." Tatsuya would surely punch the daylights out of him if he could ever hear what he, Kazuya, was saying. A mental image of a shocked, wailing Tat-chan made Kazuya chuckle a bit.
Miyuki nodded in approval. "That's good. Tell me how you moaned and begged for him to make you co--"
"Oyasumi, Miyuki-san." Kazuya interrupted. The woman could really be annoyingly nosy sometimes, but Miyuki was fun to be with by simply being herself.
"Oyasumi, Kazuya." a hint of teasing laced her voice. She watched as Kazuya strode off to his room.
Miyuki stared at the accessory in her hand, tracing the red bracelet, feeling the familiar etchings the bracelet had. She used to have the same accessory, given by the man she loved. She didn't believe in it and didn't give any special attention and care for the bracelet. One day, when her younger sister visited her, she saw the accessory already cut in half after she'd cooked. She asked her sister and her sister apologized for playing with it, saying she accidentally cut through it.
"I'm keeping this for you, Kazuya. Who knows? The accessories might work this time around. I hope you still have your pair, bakanishi." Miyuki grinned. It felt so good to call the man she still hasn't met with his famous nickname.
"You're an idiot for letting Kazuya go."
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A/N: I have to finish this fic soon so I can focus on Geisha...I guess, 4 more chapters for this one...I have this new plot brewing inside my head. It's fluff. I really have to stop writing angst...for a while...dammit!
As always, comments are <3! Thanks for reading! ^-^
Edit: The inspiration for the red bracelet and necklace was taken from the BTR con wherein Kazuya was wearing a red bracelet and Jin...well, duh, of course he has the necklace. >.< LOL! ^-^