mind warp.
friday night proved to be a success. lindsay, george, toni, jake francis, shiny mike, longo, jake elberger, and lauryn came. my brother was home too and christine and lenildo chilled with us for a while. it was a party, basically. and it was kickass. rolling rock, guinness, corona, and white wine were the choices of beverage. and mj was present as well. and let me tell you it made the movie 'grandma's boy' so much better than it already is. everyone seemed to have a good time and i was really glad. that was my goal, to throw a good time for everyone.
dj was with his girlfriend somewhere, and brett was mr. mcShady. all week it seems they have been M.I.A. like fags. whatever.
ok so.....if you know who shiny mike is, you'll understand why i was a bit taken back on friday night. i ended up sitting on his lap and he like, kinda responded. like didn't yell at me for doing it or make a joke about it, and had his hand on my leg and shit. it was weird. but not creeped out weird, weird because it was shiny mike. haha. like we all flirt with jake and don't think anything of it, that's just how we are. but yeah. haha that was interesting.
so saturday i met up with jaime while she was getting her hair done, she gave me a computer disc i needed. and that was the extent of my saturday. i cleaned the apartment and progressively throughout the day i felt like shit. my body felt all tingly and crazy. so i went to bed pretty early after my brother went back to my mom's.
christine and lenildo just left. lenildo was being a pain in the ass and wanted to go to newark early. i kinda wish he just left and christine stayed here. but whatever.
i still feel weird, but much better. sleep helped.
i've still been feeling kinda lonely. yesterday i was in a pretty sad mood most of the day. tam and lauryn asked me to chill last night and i wanted to go to george's...but i felt shitty and it wasn't worth it.
i'm actually thinking a couple of things aren't worth it. men are shady assholes. and i still want one. that's a pretty shitty picture.
i just give up. i don't know what to do but be blatantly honest and get to the point, because i don't have the energy to play any type of game or to beat around any bushes. so i guess i should make a few decisions.
i'm going to fail psych and do well in western civ.
i'm learning to set goals for myself for the day. not the week, or month, or year. but for the day. you don't know what the future is going to be for you. i still can't believe november is going to be over soon. where is the time going? and the time when i was little and christmas took FOREVER to get here?
those times, have surely passed.
my stomach feels sick.
dj was with his girlfriend somewhere, and brett was mr. mcShady. all week it seems they have been M.I.A. like fags. whatever.
ok so.....if you know who shiny mike is, you'll understand why i was a bit taken back on friday night. i ended up sitting on his lap and he like, kinda responded. like didn't yell at me for doing it or make a joke about it, and had his hand on my leg and shit. it was weird. but not creeped out weird, weird because it was shiny mike. haha. like we all flirt with jake and don't think anything of it, that's just how we are. but yeah. haha that was interesting.
so saturday i met up with jaime while she was getting her hair done, she gave me a computer disc i needed. and that was the extent of my saturday. i cleaned the apartment and progressively throughout the day i felt like shit. my body felt all tingly and crazy. so i went to bed pretty early after my brother went back to my mom's.
christine and lenildo just left. lenildo was being a pain in the ass and wanted to go to newark early. i kinda wish he just left and christine stayed here. but whatever.
i still feel weird, but much better. sleep helped.
i've still been feeling kinda lonely. yesterday i was in a pretty sad mood most of the day. tam and lauryn asked me to chill last night and i wanted to go to george's...but i felt shitty and it wasn't worth it.
i'm actually thinking a couple of things aren't worth it. men are shady assholes. and i still want one. that's a pretty shitty picture.
i just give up. i don't know what to do but be blatantly honest and get to the point, because i don't have the energy to play any type of game or to beat around any bushes. so i guess i should make a few decisions.
i'm going to fail psych and do well in western civ.
i'm learning to set goals for myself for the day. not the week, or month, or year. but for the day. you don't know what the future is going to be for you. i still can't believe november is going to be over soon. where is the time going? and the time when i was little and christmas took FOREVER to get here?
those times, have surely passed.
my stomach feels sick.