Ye Olde Cracke Pairings List

[quakewithfear]

I actually started this list a loooooooooooong time ago with the help of Kacfrog, but that was back before I had this LJ.  ^_^  So I'm re-posting it here along with some new additions (and cross-offs) just so I can keep track.  It's also a fun list to peruse and think "OH GOD MY BRAIN."  Not all of these are crack, but a good few of them are.  Enjoy!

Needless to say, rampant spoilers lie within.

YAOI (12/30)

1. Ansem/Roxas.  My god, do I ever love that one.  I've already done this once, but maybe after I kill off the rest of the list, I'll do more.  It's that much fun.  Oh, and by Ansem, I mean Xehanort/Riku/whatever he's calling himself.  Not the real Ansem.  I refer to him as DiZ because I think DiZ suits him better and Xehanort is a funny name for the other Ansem.  ^^;;;;;;;
   
2. DiZ/Ansem.  Holy CRAP.  There was something going on between DiZ and Xehanort back in the old days when he was King Ansem and Xehanort was his little experiment and if you don't think that DiZ would totally take advantage of Riku all confused and stuck in Ansem's body, you're nuts.
3. Xemnas/Saix.  If that's not canon, I don't know what is. 
   
4. Replica!Riku/Riku.  Too. Sexy.  For.  Words.  Replica doesn't get nearly enough love.
5. Ansem/Replica.  Again, not sure how I'd pull that off, but who CARES? 
   
6. Xaldin/Xigbar/Xaldin.  Um...  Well, there's my secret Org obsession pairing coming through right there.  I think Xigbar is the coolest thing ever and he and Xaldin together is too bizarre for words.
7. Xemnas/Saix.  If that's not canon, I don't know what is. 
   
8. Xigbar/Leon.  I can actually explain this one, but it would spoil something I'm working on.  ^^;;  So I have to keep hushed up for now.
   
9. Sephiroth/Replica!Riku.  *grin*  This one will be showing up later in something I'm currently working on.  Fanfiction has eaten my brain.
10. Auron/Cid.  OLD GUYS NEED LOVE TOO.
11. Auron/Cloud.  ^^;; What can I say?  I think it would be fun.
12. Luxord/Jack Sparrow.  C'mon, it would be nothing but smut with gambling puns.  How fun is that?
13. Seifer/Rai.  Rai totally has a huge crush on Seifer and doesn't know how to show it, y'know.
    
14. Cid/Merlin.  TOTALLY an old married couple, like Katie said.  ^_^
15. Seifer/Hayner.  This pairing wins the award for most unspoken sexual tension in the game.
    
16. Seifer/Roxas.  ...Spoke too soon.  ^^;;
17. Leon/Seifer.  What you really have to ask is how Leon would react to being called a chicken-wuss by someone half his height.  XDXD
    
18. Seifer/Riku.  *purr*
    
19. Luxord/Setzer.  "My life is a chip in your pile.  Time to ante up!"  <-- My goal is to make that phrase somehow kinky.  MORE GAMBLING SMUT!.  Let's throw Jack Sparrow in here too somehow!
    
20. Riku/Saix.  Just because there isn't enough sex between other hot silver-haired guys going on.
    
21. Xehanort/Zexion.  While I could live my life happily writing nothing but snarky dialogue-centric DiZ/Ansem porn, Xehanort/Zexion gives that verbose pair a run for their money.  Snark.  The snark will be glorious.
22. DiZ/Zexion.  I have a lot of theories about how DiZ/King Ansem interacted with his assisstants and Zexion is a particularly interesting one to think about.  ^_^  Throw Riku into the mix and this has a lot of fun potential.
    
23. Luxord/Saix.  ^^ Hooray for random crack suggestions.  I have a few kinky ideas for this one.
24. Axel/Luxord  You can't tell me that that isn't hot.  'cause it is.  Extremely. 
    
25. Peter Pan/Sora  Dude.  SO.  CANON. 
26. Demyx/Tidus  LOVE this pairing. 
    
27. Xehanort/Xemnas  OH.  HELL.  YES.
28. Hades/Auron  It would be hot.  Seriously.  Try to deny it.
29. Axel/Saix  I love this pairing because it's to obvious that they HATE each other.  I love writing couples who hate each other.  ^_^
30. Marluxia/Axel  Another fun one.  Again with the hating.  ^_^

HET  (3/7)

1. Axel/Kairi.  I think it could be interesting.  Not sure how I'd do it, but one of these days I will.
2. Mer!Sora/Ariel  I actually think that this is one of more plausible het pairings in the game.  Hell, Eric could get in on the action too with human Sora.  ^_^  It's all good.
3. Leon/Yuffie.  I'm rather curious to see how I write het with Leon.  ^^;;
   
4. Leon/Aerith.  Same as above.
5. Luxord/Kairi  Yeah, I don't know.  But I've written it!
6. Maleficent/Hades  He was totally her bitch in KH1 and you KNOW it.
   
7. Replica/Namine  This one is damn canonical, in my opinion.
8. Larxene/Demyx  It just doesn't work.  O.o;;

Yuri  (0/2)

• Ursula/Ariel.  Childhoods were meant to be broken, after all.  Maleficent/Sleeping Beauty is also fun in a similar vein.
• Maleficent/Kairi  Hey, I think it would be cool.  And there is a SAD lack of  good KH yuri.

Multiples  (1/8)

1. Sora/Roxas/Namine/Kairi.  It's so  canon.  I wonder if I can actually pull off writing a foursome.  O_O;;
   
2. DiZ/Ansem(Riku)(/Mickey)  Um.  No comment.  ^^;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
   
3. Replica!Riku/Shadow!Roxas/Anti-Sora.  I don't need to explain the appeal of this one.  ^_^  Currently in the works.
   
4. OrganizationXIII/Riku  Um... inspired by fanart.  This one's fun to play with just because I like the mental image of a bunch of hooded guys forcing Riku down and doing evil things to him and ahem.  You get the idea.
   
5. Merlin/Yen-Sid(/Mickey)  I really don't have an explanation for that one.  Just my latent sadistic inner nature peeping out.  And Yen-Sid/Mickey is so canon.
6. Xehanort/Cloud/Leon.  *cough*  Um.  This one is basically me thinking "Hm...  So if Xehanort was found in Hollow Bastion, he must have known the HB kiddies when they were younger and hoooooooooo boy that is some hot pseudo-pedophilia right there..."
7. Seifer/Roxas/Hayer  Why the hell not?
8. Xigbar/Xaldin/Replica  I like shota.  Shota is fun.  Cannibalistic abusive shota is EVEN BETTER.

OTHER (Non-human pairings and other weirdness)  (1/6)

1. Simba/Sora.  I'd like to state for the record that I'm not a furry, but I don't have any problem with it.  In fact, if it weren't for the influx of "Raven Silverwolf" types in the furry sphere of fandom, I could probably get into it, but I digress. Simba/Sora is cute, canon and SO TEMPTING. 
   
2. Sora/Tron.  "Hey Tron, wanna cyber?"
3. Beast/Xaldin.  If you didn't see the tension there, you're blind.  THAT could be one hell of a pairing.
4. Beast/Saix.  Kind of in a similar vein as the one above, but could you see Beast/Berserk!Saix?  Maybe it's just me.
5. Mickey/Goofy/Donald Any combination of those three, actually. It makes my roomie cry in the corner, but I think it could be cute.
   
6. Xemnas/Kingdom Hearts.  I blame Katie for this one. ^_^  It so works though.
   

Total Pairings: 54
# Written:  17
# To go:  37
The scary part is that I'm going to write all of these eventually.  No lie.