The Son, The Ghost, and Holy-cow! Missionary
continuing the tale...
Today, a Christian missionary tried to convert me.
Actually, she cornered me in the stairwell and blocked off my exits. From afar, she looked like an ordinary freshman or a new graduate student, someone who is unfamiliar with the labyrinth that is the Silver center, so when she called to me, I didn't think much of it. Being a good Samaritan (and completely stupid), I stopped to see what was the matter…
All of a sudden, she hands me a slip of paper and asks me if I wanted to go to church. At that moment, I knew I was screwed. Trying to be diplomatic and polite, I said that I was too busy to attend.
She didn’t buy it.
She started grilling me.
“So do you believe in Jesus Christ? Are you Christian?”
Knowing that diplomacy has failed, I made a fatal error. I said that I wasn’t. (Although in hindsight, I was really, really tempted to say that I worship the Devil and start fighting, guns a-blazing. Too bad the saner side of me took over and I had to turn down the fight.)
And so the battle raged onwards:
She asked me, “what happens after you die?”
Being a bastard, I respond “ I’ll get stuck underground and rot”
She retorted that there are only two choices, blah blah blah.
And she asked, “are you a sinner?”
Ah. But I’m a smart person. I know that she is expecting me to say “no”. So if I want to outsmart her, I’ll say “yes.” Second mistake. After I said that, the flood gates were open and the rains from Heaven came and flooded down the stairway, and the sky darkened, lightning crashed, and an aura of fervor surrounded the missionary, filling her with the strength and power of ten men, and I’m trying to make this run on keep running….
Yeah... Missionary +5 speed, +5 attack, gains charge ability, and morphs into a level 60 paladin (she didn’t believe in upgrading to the new expansion pack).
The zealot was posed to strike;
Thus….
I ran out of the stairway as fast as I could. I turned back and I didn't see anything. I kept running until I reached my lab. Once inside, I shut the door and quietly walked to my computer. Then I heard a knock...
And so ends this week's chapter
Today, a Christian missionary tried to convert me.
Actually, she cornered me in the stairwell and blocked off my exits. From afar, she looked like an ordinary freshman or a new graduate student, someone who is unfamiliar with the labyrinth that is the Silver center, so when she called to me, I didn't think much of it. Being a good Samaritan (and completely stupid), I stopped to see what was the matter…
All of a sudden, she hands me a slip of paper and asks me if I wanted to go to church. At that moment, I knew I was screwed. Trying to be diplomatic and polite, I said that I was too busy to attend.
She didn’t buy it.
She started grilling me.
“So do you believe in Jesus Christ? Are you Christian?”
Knowing that diplomacy has failed, I made a fatal error. I said that I wasn’t. (Although in hindsight, I was really, really tempted to say that I worship the Devil and start fighting, guns a-blazing. Too bad the saner side of me took over and I had to turn down the fight.)
And so the battle raged onwards:
She asked me, “what happens after you die?”
Being a bastard, I respond “ I’ll get stuck underground and rot”
She retorted that there are only two choices, blah blah blah.
And she asked, “are you a sinner?”
Ah. But I’m a smart person. I know that she is expecting me to say “no”. So if I want to outsmart her, I’ll say “yes.” Second mistake. After I said that, the flood gates were open and the rains from Heaven came and flooded down the stairway, and the sky darkened, lightning crashed, and an aura of fervor surrounded the missionary, filling her with the strength and power of ten men, and I’m trying to make this run on keep running….
Yeah... Missionary +5 speed, +5 attack, gains charge ability, and morphs into a level 60 paladin (she didn’t believe in upgrading to the new expansion pack).
The zealot was posed to strike;
Thus….
I ran out of the stairway as fast as I could. I turned back and I didn't see anything. I kept running until I reached my lab. Once inside, I shut the door and quietly walked to my computer. Then I heard a knock...
And so ends this week's chapter