In All the World (oneshot)

[qiguai]

Title: In All the World
Pairing Jieun/Yonggook
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 3149
Warnings: Explicit sexual content
Summary: AU; Yonggook thinks the universe just isn't on his side tonight.

Comments

[ext_1016714]

Wow, what can I say. I loved this. I've read this a few times and it got me thinking and thinking about life and decisions. Let me elaborate:

Plot: Wow, I really love realistic stuff like this. It's just so so great. It just feels all to real. Great job. I rarely read fanfics that get me daydreaming. Props to you. (Okay, let me find words other than "this is so great" HAHA) I just loved how it kinda showed the hardships of doing that you love. I've just been thinking about my future, so this really relates. Also, I love how baby Bang is a smelly lil boy haha.
Punctuation/grammar/stuff I care about: Fantastic job here as well.
Characterization: Well done here. I hate fanfics that portray characters way off their (public) image. For example, as too nice, too cold, y'know. I liked the "last time he played basketball with the guys" because BYG actually enjoys basketball, so good job on the specifics. (I know, I'm getting picky here haha)
Length/wordcount: Berry gud. Every sentence was meant to be there. I'm tired of newbie fanfics where the stories start off with the main character describing their morning routine, what cereal they ate for breakfast, their mode of transportation to school etc. I mean, in 5th grade, I failed my story because I did that haha. Very good with the length, no unnecessary scenes.

I'm looking for something to criticize, but I'm unable to find anything hahaha. I don't think I've ever written a fanfic comment this long. Props to you. This fanfic is very high quality. God damn, you should be honoured haha. I don't even have a livejournal account and I'm taking my time to comment!!
Please continue with what you do. You truly are talented. :)

- Claudia

[trappedintaipei]

Wow, thank you so much! You're too kind. ♥