I have a theory...
You know how some pets (eg. tortise, fish, hermit crabs) tend to grow bigger if you put them in a bigger living environment? Well, it just occurred to me that I will probably be taller if I didn't grow up in an apartment with such low ceilings. By the time I was 12, I could jump and touch the ceiling. Imagine how many inches I've lost living in a low ceiling apartment in my growing years?! I know I should have been 176cm. I feel that should be my height. DAMN. If I ever have kids, they are living in the village. Or they will have to stay outdoors and can only go indoors to sleep.
I just landed back into Dubai from Osaka. I'm very sad coz I don't have a lot of emails, so I decided to write something on LJ, so at least if I get comments, I can feel popular. On the 11+ hour journey back, I was lying in the BCRC (Bulk Crew Rest Compartment) wide awake and unable to sleep. The lousy Panasonic ICE system wasn't working, so I had no entertainment, except my trusty Ipod. So anyway, the bunks are kinda like first class coffins. Just enough for you to lie straight and not move. You can't even sit up without knocking your head. We had a 198cm tall crew with us, and he had to curl up into a foetal position to fit into the bunk. hahahah... I was luckier because I'm shorter, so I was able to lie straight with my arms folded on my chest, (clutching the ipod) eyes staring at the ceiling, which reminded me of how a corpse lies. Those who have had the misfortune of sharing a bed with me may remember that I normally sleep like a starfish. Limbs spead all across the bed. So the corpse is not my normal sleeping position, and it made me think about death. I wonder what it will be like to die. Will I be young, will I be old? Will it hurt? Will I have a funeral? If so, who will attend my funeral. My parents, children? Will I have children, what will they be like? Will they miss me? Or be happy that I'm dead. Will I be rich? Will anyone miss me? How will I die? From old age, accident? How will my body be handled? Buried? Cremated? Lost? It feels so distant and unreal, but is something none of us can escape. Will I be happy if I died now? If the plane broke into two this instant (there was turbulence) and I fell out? You know people always tell you that you should live your life as if everyday is the last. I've always thought its very stupid. You can't live life like that. You are meant to wait for some things.... even if they may never be realised...
ANYWAY.....
For those of you who didn't already know, I was thinking of buying a property in Bulgaria. Don't ask me why Bulgaria. I just want to ok! But there are a lot of hitches along the way. I meant to go during my birthday, to get it for my own birthday present. But the thought of spending my birthday alone (or possibly with my dad) in Bulgaria was too depressing, and then I got all weak and decided I needed to go back to Singapore to recharge and regain my bearings. Then I was meant to go NOW. But there were problems with the Visa. I naively thought that Singaporeans didn't need a Visa in Bulgaria. Thats what people have been telling me. But we do, and it takes a week. So I planned to get my visa done and go on the 6th after my Sydney-Christchurch trip. But now, I am told that in order to apply for the visa, I will need my passport, some recent photos, a bank statement indicating I have (a certain amount of) money, a letter from my current employer to verify that I am working with them, and my monthly salary, and I also need to pre-book my hotel and show a letter of confirmation, then I need to register with the police when I get there etc etc....
WHAT THE FUCK! Why the hell you want to know how much money I have?! What business is it of theirs? I'm just visiting! Why SHOULD I prebook my hotel when I don't even have the visa? So I got overwhelmed and pissed off, and decided that I shall not bother anymore. To begin with, a lot of people are telling me I'm crazy, especially when I cannot justify 'Why Bulgaria?'. My parents are against it, and I don't really have a good reason except my instincts tell me its right.
So now, the question is, should I follow through and take the financial risk, and piss myself off with the procedures, or should I just forget it and look back at it as a 'what-might-have-been'?
oooohhhhh decisions decisions.....
Any sound advice?
lightamillioncandles.com
I just landed back into Dubai from Osaka. I'm very sad coz I don't have a lot of emails, so I decided to write something on LJ, so at least if I get comments, I can feel popular. On the 11+ hour journey back, I was lying in the BCRC (Bulk Crew Rest Compartment) wide awake and unable to sleep. The lousy Panasonic ICE system wasn't working, so I had no entertainment, except my trusty Ipod. So anyway, the bunks are kinda like first class coffins. Just enough for you to lie straight and not move. You can't even sit up without knocking your head. We had a 198cm tall crew with us, and he had to curl up into a foetal position to fit into the bunk. hahahah... I was luckier because I'm shorter, so I was able to lie straight with my arms folded on my chest, (clutching the ipod) eyes staring at the ceiling, which reminded me of how a corpse lies. Those who have had the misfortune of sharing a bed with me may remember that I normally sleep like a starfish. Limbs spead all across the bed. So the corpse is not my normal sleeping position, and it made me think about death. I wonder what it will be like to die. Will I be young, will I be old? Will it hurt? Will I have a funeral? If so, who will attend my funeral. My parents, children? Will I have children, what will they be like? Will they miss me? Or be happy that I'm dead. Will I be rich? Will anyone miss me? How will I die? From old age, accident? How will my body be handled? Buried? Cremated? Lost? It feels so distant and unreal, but is something none of us can escape. Will I be happy if I died now? If the plane broke into two this instant (there was turbulence) and I fell out? You know people always tell you that you should live your life as if everyday is the last. I've always thought its very stupid. You can't live life like that. You are meant to wait for some things.... even if they may never be realised...
ANYWAY.....
For those of you who didn't already know, I was thinking of buying a property in Bulgaria. Don't ask me why Bulgaria. I just want to ok! But there are a lot of hitches along the way. I meant to go during my birthday, to get it for my own birthday present. But the thought of spending my birthday alone (or possibly with my dad) in Bulgaria was too depressing, and then I got all weak and decided I needed to go back to Singapore to recharge and regain my bearings. Then I was meant to go NOW. But there were problems with the Visa. I naively thought that Singaporeans didn't need a Visa in Bulgaria. Thats what people have been telling me. But we do, and it takes a week. So I planned to get my visa done and go on the 6th after my Sydney-Christchurch trip. But now, I am told that in order to apply for the visa, I will need my passport, some recent photos, a bank statement indicating I have (a certain amount of) money, a letter from my current employer to verify that I am working with them, and my monthly salary, and I also need to pre-book my hotel and show a letter of confirmation, then I need to register with the police when I get there etc etc....
WHAT THE FUCK! Why the hell you want to know how much money I have?! What business is it of theirs? I'm just visiting! Why SHOULD I prebook my hotel when I don't even have the visa? So I got overwhelmed and pissed off, and decided that I shall not bother anymore. To begin with, a lot of people are telling me I'm crazy, especially when I cannot justify 'Why Bulgaria?'. My parents are against it, and I don't really have a good reason except my instincts tell me its right.
So now, the question is, should I follow through and take the financial risk, and piss myself off with the procedures, or should I just forget it and look back at it as a 'what-might-have-been'?
oooohhhhh decisions decisions.....
Any sound advice?
lightamillioncandles.com