Guerilla Gardening
Last summer we picked up two gorgeous hibiscus topiaries. We planted english ivy at the base. In their pots, they stand nearly as tall as me- A long slender trunk with a round bush on top, pink flowers the size of dinnerplates when in bloom. I love them.
Then the kittens. Then frost.
We had to bring the trees in, they would not survive our harsh winter. But... the kittens! They will surely destroy them... We took our chances.
We pulled out the english ivy(poisonous to cats)and replaced it with bougainvillea(paper flower plant- non-toxic, hard vine, spikey & small pink & white flowers- rather expensive exotic plant)thinking the spikes would keep them from digging in the dirt.
Nope.
They have been eating the bougainvillea, spikes & all- Poor plants look like hell, all the leaves chewed off- But new ones sprouting- They're not quite dead, yet. Just very harshly pruned back. By teeth.
Once they had "pruned" the bougainvillea enough, the digging began.
I would walk by & notice heaps of dirt on the floor(usually right after cleaning it)on a fairly regular basis.
Tried the bitter spray stuff- No luck.
Tried sowing hundreds of toothpicks in the dirt, sticking up, and although it was effective for a while, they managed to slowly pluck almost all the toothpicks out with their teeth, and the digging began again.
The other night, I went to check out a noise. It was after midnight. I saw a big pile of dirt on the floor again. I got the dustpan, gathered it up, dumped it back into the pot, like I had done so many times before- But something was different...
"sniff sniff- what the... no way... oh no.... UGH!!! THEY POOPED IN IT!!!!"
So, I donned a glove and began my search for the golden turd. It was still warm when I found it.
Internet searching revealed coffee grounds & cinnamon deterred cats.
It sorta did, for a couple of days- But at 7 a.m. this morning, Dana woke me up on his way to work.
"Jen? Umm... It's... The hibiscus."
"wha?.."
"The kittens knocked it over last night."
So I got up & dealt with that- Dana had put it back as best as he could, but it had been uprooted & tossed over.
Dammit!!!
My groggy mind started to cycle through all the things I had tried, and any options I had left- I sat there staring at the tortured trees...
My coworkers face started dancing in front of me... "drown them! you were so proud of those hibiscus, and they came first. Have you tried drowning the cats? That would work. *grin* Or... bamboo skewers, maybe?"
"Jen?"
"Drown them..."
"Jen?!"
"Huh- Oh- Sorry Dana.. I..."
"Jen, try the chicken wire. I know it won't look nice, but..."
He's smart, that one.
So that's what I spent the morning doing. And the skewers too, for good measure.
*sigh*
And we're actually thinking of putting up the x-mas tree this year?
f*ck.
Then the kittens. Then frost.
We had to bring the trees in, they would not survive our harsh winter. But... the kittens! They will surely destroy them... We took our chances.
We pulled out the english ivy(poisonous to cats)and replaced it with bougainvillea(paper flower plant- non-toxic, hard vine, spikey & small pink & white flowers- rather expensive exotic plant)thinking the spikes would keep them from digging in the dirt.
Nope.
They have been eating the bougainvillea, spikes & all- Poor plants look like hell, all the leaves chewed off- But new ones sprouting- They're not quite dead, yet. Just very harshly pruned back. By teeth.
Once they had "pruned" the bougainvillea enough, the digging began.
I would walk by & notice heaps of dirt on the floor(usually right after cleaning it)on a fairly regular basis.
Tried the bitter spray stuff- No luck.
Tried sowing hundreds of toothpicks in the dirt, sticking up, and although it was effective for a while, they managed to slowly pluck almost all the toothpicks out with their teeth, and the digging began again.
The other night, I went to check out a noise. It was after midnight. I saw a big pile of dirt on the floor again. I got the dustpan, gathered it up, dumped it back into the pot, like I had done so many times before- But something was different...
"sniff sniff- what the... no way... oh no.... UGH!!! THEY POOPED IN IT!!!!"
So, I donned a glove and began my search for the golden turd. It was still warm when I found it.
Internet searching revealed coffee grounds & cinnamon deterred cats.
It sorta did, for a couple of days- But at 7 a.m. this morning, Dana woke me up on his way to work.
"Jen? Umm... It's... The hibiscus."
"wha?.."
"The kittens knocked it over last night."
So I got up & dealt with that- Dana had put it back as best as he could, but it had been uprooted & tossed over.
Dammit!!!
My groggy mind started to cycle through all the things I had tried, and any options I had left- I sat there staring at the tortured trees...
My coworkers face started dancing in front of me... "drown them! you were so proud of those hibiscus, and they came first. Have you tried drowning the cats? That would work. *grin* Or... bamboo skewers, maybe?"
"Jen?"
"Drown them..."
"Jen?!"
"Huh- Oh- Sorry Dana.. I..."
"Jen, try the chicken wire. I know it won't look nice, but..."
He's smart, that one.
So that's what I spent the morning doing. And the skewers too, for good measure.
*sigh*
And we're actually thinking of putting up the x-mas tree this year?
f*ck.