reminders'
I'm pretty okay,I quess. I'm not sad or mad yet im not happy. I remember feelin' like I felt last niqht. cept it wasn't that bad. I never thouqht he would make me feel like that ever aqain. and I remember his words like it was yesterday.."I hope you qot was comin' back to you cause' if you do qet it,it's qonna have somethin' to do with me and I don't want that cause I know I can take bein' hurt,I know I can take it,I know you can't thas why I don't wanna hurt you"...I've never been hurt so much in my life. I cryed until I was able to stop my self because I hate crying. I never wanna cry again. but at the same time I was soo heated. I tryed to qo to sleep. but everytime I closed my eyes i qot this imaqe of him and her layin' on his bed in the dark. finally 20 minutes later I ran to the bathroom. I threw up..I didn't qet any sleep. The out come of me qettin' comfartable was me layin under the covers on my stomach with no pillows or anything. Finally around 6:30am I think I must've fell asleep. Lately I can't remember any of my dreams. Before I used to dream every niqht.My mom woke me up around 1pm.I just layed there for a while and then pun called, Just in time! He made me lauph and everything. Thas was somethin' I needed so i told him to call me back toniqht cause I was qoin' out. Christen called me up and asked me what was wronq I told her and she told me soo...I qot dressed took a shower and everything but I didn't eat anything. I called Sashana and we went to the mall. I saw a pair of timbs I want. Sashana made me lauph' all day lol,Thank qod she's funny. I haven't had a qood lauph since him. Then Fridaliz and me were talkin' bout some funny iish that happened in the past I was lauphin my ass off! das my qirl for real. She qot my back no matta what and is mutual~Fridaliz I love you qirl!! lol.
It's wierd I don't have any anger towards the qirl he did that shit with. It's not like all his other 'girlfriends' that I couldn't stand. I'm not anqry at her..I'm just anqry towards him.He disrespected me,my family and all my feelin's for him. I have no respect for him. He's looked down on the thinqs I've done and lost respect for me then but yet I wasn't with him at the time and look what he qoes and does.Makes an idiot of himself. 'hypocrit'. Looks like I'm back to where I'm startin' wit qettin' over him aqain. It's qonna be harder this time cause he had more to do with my life and family and when I look around my room I qet reminders of shit. Oh well thas it. It's over and done with. All the love i had left in my heart for him..he kill't it. My heart is qone and I have no love left. He broke my heart. and that everyone is what it's like to qet your heart broken by somebody you reaLLy love,someone you trusted,someone who was you 'best friend' and someone you depended on.
Thank qoodness for my cousin tony. Thats girls been there for me for everything. She's heard it ALL and helped me out. Thank god for her words.~I love you toni.
Ima move on....
It's wierd I don't have any anger towards the qirl he did that shit with. It's not like all his other 'girlfriends' that I couldn't stand. I'm not anqry at her..I'm just anqry towards him.He disrespected me,my family and all my feelin's for him. I have no respect for him. He's looked down on the thinqs I've done and lost respect for me then but yet I wasn't with him at the time and look what he qoes and does.Makes an idiot of himself. 'hypocrit'. Looks like I'm back to where I'm startin' wit qettin' over him aqain. It's qonna be harder this time cause he had more to do with my life and family and when I look around my room I qet reminders of shit. Oh well thas it. It's over and done with. All the love i had left in my heart for him..he kill't it. My heart is qone and I have no love left. He broke my heart. and that everyone is what it's like to qet your heart broken by somebody you reaLLy love,someone you trusted,someone who was you 'best friend' and someone you depended on.
Thank qoodness for my cousin tony. Thats girls been there for me for everything. She's heard it ALL and helped me out. Thank god for her words.~I love you toni.
Ima move on....