Holiday blues
My supervisor took this past Friday off but left me an e-mail wishing me "and my family" a merry Christmas. It was nice of him, but he emphasized the fact that it was going to be my first Christmas in my own house, which was bound to be extra special, as his was for him.
Well, I consider my first Christmas in the condo to be that Christmas. It was my first Christmas as a husband, my first Christmas as a homeowner (even though it was not a "house"), and my first Christmas owning a real tree (at least that I can remember). It was indeed a special and wonderful time.
This Christmas was nice. The food, company, and presents were all very good; perhaps even too good. When my spouse and her current partner left for the night, I couldn't help but feel very lonely. It felt very much like a real good-bye, rather than the see-you-later that it really was. There are decorations, unwashed dishes, and piles of crumpled wrapping paper to highlight the contrast between having people around and not.
I've always felt especially depressed when it comes time for me to go home by myself after a visit with someone that I am attached to. It felt the same way this time, except I was staying put and the someone was leaving.
Well, I consider my first Christmas in the condo to be that Christmas. It was my first Christmas as a husband, my first Christmas as a homeowner (even though it was not a "house"), and my first Christmas owning a real tree (at least that I can remember). It was indeed a special and wonderful time.
This Christmas was nice. The food, company, and presents were all very good; perhaps even too good. When my spouse and her current partner left for the night, I couldn't help but feel very lonely. It felt very much like a real good-bye, rather than the see-you-later that it really was. There are decorations, unwashed dishes, and piles of crumpled wrapping paper to highlight the contrast between having people around and not.
I've always felt especially depressed when it comes time for me to go home by myself after a visit with someone that I am attached to. It felt the same way this time, except I was staying put and the someone was leaving.