Insomnia
I had the absolute worst night last night.
I get the occasional bout of full on insomnia but not very often, maybe just once or twice a year. And this isn't just the difficulty in sleeping insomnia, but feeling completely wired, wanting to crawl up the walls, can't get comfortable insomnia. It feels completely different to a sleepless night... I can't quite explain it adequately. I took some medication once that had the side effect of insomnia and it feels exactly the same - like it's chemically induced (I never took that medication again, trust me!)
But anyway, on top of that insomnia, I had a rare time where my brain decided it wanted to play games with me and just ran every horrible scenario at me that it could. Mainly involving family and friends dying. I'd rationalise one away, and then another idea would jump into my head.
So insomnia + that = me wanting to scratch my eyes out.
Instead of scratching my eyes out, I grabbed my iPod, lay down, closed my eyes and listened to... well, you can probably guess who the playlist consisted of.
Within two songs all of the bad thoughts melted away.
After about twenty minutes, I felt sleepy.
I think I managed six or seven songs before I actually fell asleep.
I had a couple of dreams, but they were innocent enough (they involved some very random teaching assignments) and I woke up this morning to a silent iPod. The battery hadn't ran out, so I must have switched it off in my sleep or something.
So yeah. I'm sharing this purely because it sums up why I'm a fan of a voice that can soothe me so easily, why I've travelled so far to hear it, why I've wasted so much money on it and why I spend any spare second I have (and many I don't) supporting it. The man it's attached to is completely irrelevant, at times...
(As an aside, the reason my brain chemistry was so out of whack last night was probably due to the joys of being a woman and nothing more sinister, in case anyone was worried...)
I get the occasional bout of full on insomnia but not very often, maybe just once or twice a year. And this isn't just the difficulty in sleeping insomnia, but feeling completely wired, wanting to crawl up the walls, can't get comfortable insomnia. It feels completely different to a sleepless night... I can't quite explain it adequately. I took some medication once that had the side effect of insomnia and it feels exactly the same - like it's chemically induced (I never took that medication again, trust me!)
But anyway, on top of that insomnia, I had a rare time where my brain decided it wanted to play games with me and just ran every horrible scenario at me that it could. Mainly involving family and friends dying. I'd rationalise one away, and then another idea would jump into my head.
So insomnia + that = me wanting to scratch my eyes out.
Instead of scratching my eyes out, I grabbed my iPod, lay down, closed my eyes and listened to... well, you can probably guess who the playlist consisted of.
Within two songs all of the bad thoughts melted away.
After about twenty minutes, I felt sleepy.
I think I managed six or seven songs before I actually fell asleep.
I had a couple of dreams, but they were innocent enough (they involved some very random teaching assignments) and I woke up this morning to a silent iPod. The battery hadn't ran out, so I must have switched it off in my sleep or something.
So yeah. I'm sharing this purely because it sums up why I'm a fan of a voice that can soothe me so easily, why I've travelled so far to hear it, why I've wasted so much money on it and why I spend any spare second I have (and many I don't) supporting it. The man it's attached to is completely irrelevant, at times...
(As an aside, the reason my brain chemistry was so out of whack last night was probably due to the joys of being a woman and nothing more sinister, in case anyone was worried...)