its been a while......
i haven't posted in..... a long-ass time, i know. nothing happens in delaware.
so, yeah, i'm still pining over tommy. because i love his cute, slightly retarded, ass. and if he's slightly retarded, so am i. lol.
um, medical billing.... yeah, i'm gonna start training for that just as soon as i get the fundage. crazy, right? but its a challenge, and people in the field have said its pretty well paid. so i'ma go for it.
can't move to cali till next year at least. fuckin AA. no major life changes for a year. motherfuckers. but, i wanna help him stay sober, not drive him back into the bottle. he's trying so hard to be good.... and there, but for the grace of the gods, go i. so here i stay.
and gods am i afraid i might hurt him. i know, me, not scared of shit, scared to death of someone's feelings. insane. i'm also scared he'll find someone better than me. there are a LOT of girls out there better than me. better looking. smarter. better in bed..... me, i'm nothing.
that being said, i'm in a funk right now. becca lost her baby. a mere 3 months into the pregnancy. its either the massive amounts of smokers in her house at any given time, or the gods' way of telling her to get her stepson under control before she has one of her own. or both. and i don't even know why i'm in such a funk over it. it happened because it was meant to. but i feel like crap over it.
and i know i'm in a funk, because i'm having an extreme fondness for break-up music, like blue october's song, hate me. or staind's mudshovel. and an unnatural fondness for sappy love ballads, like avenged sevenfold's warmness on the soul, and seize the day. there is something wrong in my brain. i'm doubting EVERYTHING more than usual. gods, i'm such a little pansy. i'ma go and find some lacuna coil and my chemical romance on the internetz. then go to icanhascheeseburger.com for lolcats.
so, yeah, i'm still pining over tommy. because i love his cute, slightly retarded, ass. and if he's slightly retarded, so am i. lol.
um, medical billing.... yeah, i'm gonna start training for that just as soon as i get the fundage. crazy, right? but its a challenge, and people in the field have said its pretty well paid. so i'ma go for it.
can't move to cali till next year at least. fuckin AA. no major life changes for a year. motherfuckers. but, i wanna help him stay sober, not drive him back into the bottle. he's trying so hard to be good.... and there, but for the grace of the gods, go i. so here i stay.
and gods am i afraid i might hurt him. i know, me, not scared of shit, scared to death of someone's feelings. insane. i'm also scared he'll find someone better than me. there are a LOT of girls out there better than me. better looking. smarter. better in bed..... me, i'm nothing.
that being said, i'm in a funk right now. becca lost her baby. a mere 3 months into the pregnancy. its either the massive amounts of smokers in her house at any given time, or the gods' way of telling her to get her stepson under control before she has one of her own. or both. and i don't even know why i'm in such a funk over it. it happened because it was meant to. but i feel like crap over it.
and i know i'm in a funk, because i'm having an extreme fondness for break-up music, like blue october's song, hate me. or staind's mudshovel. and an unnatural fondness for sappy love ballads, like avenged sevenfold's warmness on the soul, and seize the day. there is something wrong in my brain. i'm doubting EVERYTHING more than usual. gods, i'm such a little pansy. i'ma go and find some lacuna coil and my chemical romance on the internetz. then go to icanhascheeseburger.com for lolcats.