Hey.... it's that journal I have.
My live journal has been mostly dead.
My own fault really. Most of my life has been in a similar state of nothingness I guess.
Stuff happened.
I was fired a little over a month ago. I haven't applied to many places, wanting to see if I'd be able to maybe handle some art related work for a bit. Hah... some plan that turned out to be. My unemployment was denied too.
And here's where I mention Fox and I had just moved into an apartment the day before. Fun. huh?
Now it's 6:30 am. My night-owlish tendency has resurfaced with a vengence. Before I would try to be asleep at 2:30.
And I haven't been accomplishing much of anything at all. A few doodles here and there. A commission or two. I cooked a bit the first couple of weeks here at the apartment.
I like it here. One of our closest/bestest friends moved in with us. It's been interesting.
But I'm still a mess. I don't know how to pull myself together anymore, or maybe I never knew how.
I'm starting to settle into a monotonous pattern of self doubt, anxiety, trying to forget it by distracting myself with housemate/Fox/friends, and just failing miserably.
I guess it will be some time before I figure it out a bit more.
And the newest quandry.... I left a message on the forums to the newpaper of the area I used to live. Someone put two and two together and now I'm wondering just who would be there to invoke the name 'Bobby Godek'. It can't be a friend of my brother because he hates being called Bobby. He wouldn't stand for it.
So now... it's 6:47 and I'm left wondering how to handle tomorrow... and who would bring up the name of a man who died 20 years ago.
My own fault really. Most of my life has been in a similar state of nothingness I guess.
Stuff happened.
I was fired a little over a month ago. I haven't applied to many places, wanting to see if I'd be able to maybe handle some art related work for a bit. Hah... some plan that turned out to be. My unemployment was denied too.
And here's where I mention Fox and I had just moved into an apartment the day before. Fun. huh?
Now it's 6:30 am. My night-owlish tendency has resurfaced with a vengence. Before I would try to be asleep at 2:30.
And I haven't been accomplishing much of anything at all. A few doodles here and there. A commission or two. I cooked a bit the first couple of weeks here at the apartment.
I like it here. One of our closest/bestest friends moved in with us. It's been interesting.
But I'm still a mess. I don't know how to pull myself together anymore, or maybe I never knew how.
I'm starting to settle into a monotonous pattern of self doubt, anxiety, trying to forget it by distracting myself with housemate/Fox/friends, and just failing miserably.
I guess it will be some time before I figure it out a bit more.
And the newest quandry.... I left a message on the forums to the newpaper of the area I used to live. Someone put two and two together and now I'm wondering just who would be there to invoke the name 'Bobby Godek'. It can't be a friend of my brother because he hates being called Bobby. He wouldn't stand for it.
So now... it's 6:47 and I'm left wondering how to handle tomorrow... and who would bring up the name of a man who died 20 years ago.