In Memoriam...
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community whose warmth, infectious laugh and homey nature will be sorely missed among many.
It is my sad duty to report that the Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection, heat exposure and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin draped in a buttercream shroud. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, Dinty Moore, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his bread on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions and one of the hardest working figures in the industry. His favorite saying was "Gotta get my buns moving!"
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosie Dough, plus they had one in the oven.
He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart, an itinerant brother, Notinuff Dough and his sweet, long-time companion and personal assistant, Little Debbie. The post-funeral luncheon snacks were provided by Dolly Madison.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes. During a toast, there was speculation that he would rise from the dead, but it was beaten down when announced he would be creamated.
Donations can be made to the Holsum-Wonderbread Foundation.
If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the occasion and take time to pass it on and share that smile with someone else who may be having a crumby day and kneads a lift.
It is my sad duty to report that the Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection, heat exposure and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin draped in a buttercream shroud. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, Dinty Moore, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his bread on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions and one of the hardest working figures in the industry. His favorite saying was "Gotta get my buns moving!"
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosie Dough, plus they had one in the oven.
He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart, an itinerant brother, Notinuff Dough and his sweet, long-time companion and personal assistant, Little Debbie. The post-funeral luncheon snacks were provided by Dolly Madison.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes. During a toast, there was speculation that he would rise from the dead, but it was beaten down when announced he would be creamated.
Donations can be made to the Holsum-Wonderbread Foundation.
If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the occasion and take time to pass it on and share that smile with someone else who may be having a crumby day and kneads a lift.