Grandma
I feel like a concerned parent who has just seen their first child off on her first weekend away.
I made Grandma as prepared as I could. I typed out a check list of things for Uncle Dennis' family to help her while she's there (included below.) I cleaned out her purse, got her a new comb, helped pack her suitcase. I made two cards with phone numbers to reach me, Mom, Uncle Dennis, Aunt Debbie, and Dr Kim. One I put in her wallet/notebook; one she can put somewhere such as on the fridge. I used a large bold font and typed each name/number in a different bright color. I wrote the number 1 in front of each area code. I wish her own cell phone were working. I got her eyedrops and refilled her meds for the week. I explained her pills to Dennis, and how to apply her hormone cream.
Dennis came sooner than I expected. I didn't have time to paint Grandma's nails first. I told her she should ask Holly or Denny, that if they're around (they're very busy high school girls) one of them would be glad to do it. I really hope they're all not too busy this weekend to spend time with Grandma.
Dennis' primary reason for driving down here was to pick up equipment for work. No dilly-dallying, I grabbed the last few things she needed and did a quick mental check and briefing with Dennis. I walked Grandma outside, he boosted her up into his big truck and then whisked her away.
When I stayed with her at Dennis' two weekends ago, I made sure she turned on the light everytime she woke up during the night to go to the bathroom. I made her food, pointed out where the milk was that she couldn't find even though it was in the fridge right in front of her. I helped her up when she slipped getting onto a chair, and ran to her when she fell over trying to pick up the Sunday paper.
She's doing so much better now, even in the last week. Neither Mom or I baby her; we have her do as much as she can on her own. But she still shouldn't be on her own for too long. What if someone's not there when she's need it?
To think, Mom has gone through these types of parenting emotions with five different kids, and now with her own mom. Mom said she was feeling concerned for and protective of Grandma; I'm started to understand what she meant. It's good though, because it shows that a closeness and affection has grown between my Mom and Grandma that wasn't there before. I mean, this is the same Grandma who made Mom want to be a nun and never have kids, the same Grandma who made Mom want to move far away from Michigan and not feel bad that her kids only got to see their grandparents once a year.
In the last few years Grandma has gone through a lot of changes, and somehow, now that she's learning to accept the reality of her husband's severe dementia as well as her own growing senility and dependence, she's becoming a sweeter and happier person than I've ever seen her before.
I don't feel like I "need a break" as Dennis suggested. I'm only officially in charge of Grandma Mon-Thurs when Mom's away at work. Mom's the one who has been spending the most time with her, and even then I don't think she feels it a chore. I just hope it will be a nice time for Grandma, doing something different, seeing her other grandchildren. I hope she isn't left alone too long, that she doesn't hurt herself. I'm actually looking forward to her coming back so she can go to SeaWorld with me like we had planned to do today.
I made Grandma as prepared as I could. I typed out a check list of things for Uncle Dennis' family to help her while she's there (included below.) I cleaned out her purse, got her a new comb, helped pack her suitcase. I made two cards with phone numbers to reach me, Mom, Uncle Dennis, Aunt Debbie, and Dr Kim. One I put in her wallet/notebook; one she can put somewhere such as on the fridge. I used a large bold font and typed each name/number in a different bright color. I wrote the number 1 in front of each area code. I wish her own cell phone were working. I got her eyedrops and refilled her meds for the week. I explained her pills to Dennis, and how to apply her hormone cream.
Dennis came sooner than I expected. I didn't have time to paint Grandma's nails first. I told her she should ask Holly or Denny, that if they're around (they're very busy high school girls) one of them would be glad to do it. I really hope they're all not too busy this weekend to spend time with Grandma.
Dennis' primary reason for driving down here was to pick up equipment for work. No dilly-dallying, I grabbed the last few things she needed and did a quick mental check and briefing with Dennis. I walked Grandma outside, he boosted her up into his big truck and then whisked her away.
When I stayed with her at Dennis' two weekends ago, I made sure she turned on the light everytime she woke up during the night to go to the bathroom. I made her food, pointed out where the milk was that she couldn't find even though it was in the fridge right in front of her. I helped her up when she slipped getting onto a chair, and ran to her when she fell over trying to pick up the Sunday paper.
She's doing so much better now, even in the last week. Neither Mom or I baby her; we have her do as much as she can on her own. But she still shouldn't be on her own for too long. What if someone's not there when she's need it?
To think, Mom has gone through these types of parenting emotions with five different kids, and now with her own mom. Mom said she was feeling concerned for and protective of Grandma; I'm started to understand what she meant. It's good though, because it shows that a closeness and affection has grown between my Mom and Grandma that wasn't there before. I mean, this is the same Grandma who made Mom want to be a nun and never have kids, the same Grandma who made Mom want to move far away from Michigan and not feel bad that her kids only got to see their grandparents once a year.
In the last few years Grandma has gone through a lot of changes, and somehow, now that she's learning to accept the reality of her husband's severe dementia as well as her own growing senility and dependence, she's becoming a sweeter and happier person than I've ever seen her before.
I don't feel like I "need a break" as Dennis suggested. I'm only officially in charge of Grandma Mon-Thurs when Mom's away at work. Mom's the one who has been spending the most time with her, and even then I don't think she feels it a chore. I just hope it will be a nice time for Grandma, doing something different, seeing her other grandchildren. I hope she isn't left alone too long, that she doesn't hurt herself. I'm actually looking forward to her coming back so she can go to SeaWorld with me like we had planned to do today.