Prolonged Wailing

Aug 30, 2016 20:11


So remember how last week I said we would be getting perc holes dug? Remember the proto-enthusiasm?

Yeah.

’bout that.

No.

See, we called on Monday - agreed a rough time with our groundworks contractor - and then called the septic guy - and arranged a time. Then Kathryn called back our groundworks contractor - and couldn’t reach him. She tried 3 more times up to yesterday leaving messages each time. I tried this lunchtime - still couldn’t reach him.

Given that we were meant to be there tomorrow afternoon we finally gave in and rang our septic guy and said “we think we need to cancel, we can’t reach Chris”.

Our septic guy messages our groundworks guy and…gets an answer a few minutes later. Apparently he’s out of town now because ‘we didn’t confirm the time’.

Seriously?

So I think we now need a new groundworks contractor. Which is upsetting because we liked Chris. And he didn’t talk to us like we are idiots. Right at this point I feel more like going and renting a damn digger and doing it ourselves. I know that’s foolish, it would take far too long and wouldn’t be nearly the standard someone skilled would do. But it’s really, really frustrating.

So I’m feeling really demoralized. I realize this is just overflow stress because yesterday was my last day as an Emergency Nurse - which is what I’ve been for the past 9 years. And it feels weird to not be one, and to be technically unemployed* - and I’m having that whole existential angst thing related to my soul probably having made it about as far as Newport**, and me being here.

It’s not so much homesickness, it’s more trying to understand who I am when so many of the supports of the constituent parts of who I am have gone or are far away. If I wasn’t so set in being me, it’d be a great opportunity to reinvent myself.

* well, super-technically, I’m unemployed from Thursday - I’m just not working today or tomorrow.
** Arcturuan mega-camel speeds.

Originally published at Mostly lemon based. You can comment here or there.

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