(no subject)
This will be one of the very very very few non-friends-only entries in forever. its a creative writing thing..it sucked. it had to be humor...i dont write humor.
Kat Andersen
Humorous personal experience
11/28/04
“Stupid is as stupid does”
Picture this. You’re an eight-year-old, three-foot nothing, blonde as a Barbie doll, little girl with a gap-toothed smile. Standing bruised and scarred in ripped blue jeans, stained t-shirt and jelly sandals, next to the 11 year old Johnny bravo you call a brother.
Our story starts on a normal summer day in your suburban neighborhood. Johnny bravo and his Spiderman Velcro shoed friends are up to trouble as always, but today. You are the target. Taking you to the backyard they point to the all-familiar pecan tree, but its different somehow today. On the Outstretched limb to the left there’s a solitary rope hanging with a loop at the bottom.
“Swing on it,” Johnny bravo snickers with that evil grin, “from there…” he says. Pointing at the 4-foot tall chain link fence to the left of the tree…directly under the limb.
“I aint never turned down a dare!” you say, taking a deep breath before heading over to the supposed swing.
You survey the death trap and then tuck the end of the rope into your ripped jeans pocket. Hoisting your barely 65 pound frame atop the chain link fence you look down. Approximately seven feet below you stand your older brother and his two buddies, watching intently to see if you do it or not. Tucking your jelly sandaled foot into the loop on the bottom of contraption, you take hold of the top of the rope and with a Tarzan yell you jump off.
Sharp pain.
You wake up on the ground next to the tree. Dirt and leaves stick in the blood from your freshly broken nose. Trying to pick your self up you can’t feel your fingers on your left hand. What the hell? Looking at your arm…your elbow is inside out, wrist is terribly bent and your pinky…dangling from your hand.
Johnny bravo and his band of merry men run to get help. Your father picks you up from the puddle of red mud. Apparently…when you jumped..you slammed straight into the trunk of the pecan tree. Your nose is broken and your left arm…demolished. Elbow shattered; wrist broken in two places and your pinky will be crooked for the rest of your life.
But you don’t care. You defeated them. Death trap-0 stupid kid-1. The next day you strut down your block, hott pink cast as colorful as the bruise on your nose. Merely battle scars. Your reputation is safe as the most badass girl on your street, as well as the stupidest.