Happy 2007.
it's the start of a brand new year.
clean slate.
blank paper.
but i'm not ready to get rid of the completely covered with scribbles paper i have in front of me.
i feel like there was so much more to do.
so much i didn't accomplish that i could have (and should have).
it's such an anti-climatic ceremony, out with the old in with the new.
but that's how it goes.
my year in review:
withdrew from school.
got a fulltime job.
removed myself from a group of friends.
moved past a painful "relationship".
got inducted into the karaoke regular club.
put myself in a new painful "relationship".
flaked on going back to school twice.
finally took a step toward going back to school.
and that's about it. all the major things anyway.
doesn't look like a lot to me.
sure, by removing myself from a that group of friends i managed to curb my drinking
ergo lose the weight i had gained from large quantities of alcohol.
and also realized i was using alcohol to medicate, the first step toward alcoholism.
but have i learned from my mistakes? no.
i still make the same mistakes i always make.
i fall for the unavailable guys.
the ones who treat me like second best.
the ones who i let treat me like second best.
do i have resolutions? don't we all.
are they really related to the new year? god no.
they are related to bettering my life, regardless of how long they take.
i resolve to make myself my first priority (at least until i have kiddies -so for a few hundred years).
i resolve to listen to my heart.
i resolve to stop worrying about what other people think.
i resolve to spend less time moping and stewing and reliving
and more time looking forward and at the bright side.
i resolve to trust myself and my intuition.
i resolve to find at least two good things about each and every day.
i resolve to be more outgoing/less timid
i resolve to put my all into everything i do.
and so i rung in the new year dancing with marcella.
and soon found myself meeting a sweet girl (she's 28) who tried to set me up with her boyfriend's friend.
just for the night mind you.
he was short and wearing a beanie.
and all i could think about was... someone else.
i resolve to take the power i gave you back.
i resolve to not let you rule my thoughts. and actions.
i resolve to live my own life. for myself.
i resolve to live.
to make mistakes.
to learn from said mistakes.
to overcome obstacles as they come and not fear them.
happy new year, my darlings.
may we all find happier times and opportunities to better our lives.
♥