Hormones and pimples and homework, oh my!
Originally published at Short Attention Span Girl. You can comment here or there.
As I sit here at the College Fair, manning my lonely little desk, it occurs to me that I like kids. Not necessarily the little ones, although I do love it when they’re just starting to talk. But little kids get enough attention (except from the seemingly deaf-blind-mute parents who let their kids run amok in grocery stores and shopping malls, shrieking like banshees, knocking over senior citizens, and demanding candy bars - but that’s another post).
I like high school kids. Adolescents. Smallish humans in the throes of one of life’s most agonizing stages.
It’s hard for me to pin down exactly what it is about teenagers that I’m so drawn to. It’s their energy, but also their potential. Adolescents are so full of life, and they have so much life ahead of them.
I remember having these same thoughts when I went to the homecoming football game of my old high school. I love seeing the kids run around and do all the things that kids that age do - squeal in delight, beat the crap out of each other with glee, and dress themselves in ways that would make a cheap hooker blush. They show their school spirit by wrapping themselves in the most ridiculous clothes and wigs and face paint ever imagined. Or they go the route of wearing twelve layers of black with anarchy symbols and silver jingly bits all over the place. They guzzle down hot dogs and twinkies and deep fried animal parts and wholly unnecessary energy drinks without thinking even once about waistlines or cholesterol levels.
Everything in a teenager’s life is so big, so all-encompassing and life-threatening. They are absolutely brilliant one moment, speaking life truths that are forgotten or overlooked by jaded and world-weary adults, and spouting the most inane nonsense the next.
I think it’s a real shame that adults are so dismissive and scornful of teenagers. Sure, they’re embarrassing and awkward and sometimes rude, but at least they have an excuse. Raging hormones, uncertainty about the future, and a conflicting urge to fit in and stand out make for some turbulent behaviors.
Personally, I think adults just don’t want to remember what they were like at that age. Whether or not they were as outwardly boisterous as some of the kids today, they had the same things going on internally. But instead of showing sympathy, empathy, and understanding, most grown-ups choose to shun these kids and deny any knowledge or comprehension of why they act how they do. Or maybe they’re jealous, wishing they could go back to that time when turning in an essay or getting a prom date were the big traumas, not paying the mortgage or fighting cancer. But the jealous ones forget how difficult it was, and is, to be a teenager. Remember puberty?
I have the utmost respect for anyone in the middle of these crazy years, pretty much from 6th grade through middle age, but especially the teens. Adolescents are expected to behave and conform, as if they were still in elementary school, but also grow up and act like responsible adults. And they really are trying to do both, to be both, but it’s impossible. And they get hassled from both sides. “Stop being so immature! Grow up! Figure it out!” “Sit down and be quiet! Do what you’re told! You’re getting awfully big for your britches!” It’s amazing they make it to adulthood at all, with all the conflicting messages and demands.
I love being around kids at this age, and it’s one of the things I miss most from teaching. They’re so surprising, amazing, and infuriating. They rock the boat. They do the socially unacceptable things that make people uncomfortable, because they’re testing the waters, learning the consequences, judging the limits. It’s necessary for their passage to “responsible adulthood,” and it’s too bad adults aren’t more tolerant of it. At least rude kids have the excuse that they’re learning what’s acceptable. Rude adults should know better.
Now, in no way am I saying or implying that there shouldn’t be consequences or punishments when adolescents get out of line. On the contrary, that’s the only way they’ll learn. Parents who let their kids run wild aren’t doing them a favor at all.
I just think the older generations are doing everyone a disservice by acting like, and perhaps wishing, teenagers didn’t exist. If they could see all the excitement and potential in this exhibit hall, maybe that would change a little. Or maybe people would just see rowdy, disrespectful kids, like they expect.
For further study: Anatomy of a Teenager’s Brain