Fuel To My Fire [9/10]
Title: Fuel To My Fire
Chapter: Nine
Rating: R overall, for language and whatnot.
Summary: "It's your own fault, son." My Dad had adopted the same tone as his wife. They were trying to be calm to piss me off. Boarding school was meant to piss me off.
Disclaimer: I have more chance of owning a flying monkey with horns, so don't worry.
Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight
I was the one gripping his wrist, but David led the way up to his room, dragging me along behind him. I knew where his room was, but had never stepped foot in there before, I didn’t even know who his room-mate was, he’d never mentioned it.
He pulled me down the hall, weaving effortlessly through some parts of the crowd, and walking straight through other groups, making them scatter. I couldn't tell if he was angry, upset or worried. Though, I was pretty certain that he wasn't angry, because when I almost tripped he did look back and ask if I was okay.
It seems that every single dorm room in that place was painted in the exact same way, all the furniture in the exact same places. David's walls were plastered with Green Day and No Doubt posters -"Gwen Stefani, the only girl I've ever found attractive," he had said- and there was a small table next to his bed, littered with books, all their spines lined and concave from repetitive reading. He’d already unpacked.
Walking forward, I stood in the exact centre of the room while he remained by the door, the optimum spot for someone planning to escape if things were to get out of hand. "What do you want?" he asked.
"I’d like to talk to you about what happened."
He stepped forward with slightly outstretched arms. "Well, If you’re gonna shout then just get it over with."
"I’m not gonna yell, I’m not angry with you at all," I reassured.
He raised one of his eyebrows, the same side of his mouth going with it, "What?"
"I’m not mad at you. Why? Did you think I was?"
He blushed, "Yeah."
"Why would I be mad at you?"
In front of him, there was a round rug that looked a lot like a target, starting out with a circle of dark blue in the middle, then rings of lighter blue surrounding it, he rolled the edge up with the toe of his shoe, "I got you drunk and kissed you."
I shook my head, "No, you didn’t. I got myself drunk then kissed you."
"And you regret it?"
Looking from left to right, as if searching for those signs of regret around me, I shrugged, "Not at all."
David’s eyes narrowed, the darkness of the eyeliner taking over the colour of his irises. I tried my hardest to read between the lines and see what was going on in his head. It was clear on his face though, he was confused with too much thinking. "You’re straight, Pierre."
"When did I ever say that I was? You naturally assumed that I was straight, I just chose not to agree or disagree."
It looked like I had him there. "Are you gay then?"
"Nope. I like girls, David. Well, not right now anyway, I like you more. But I’ve always preferred girls mostly, like, before I met you." The hole I was digging myself into was growing deeper and deeper with every word, so I shut up babbling.
David nodded in understanding, "So you’re bi?"
I bit my lip and looked away from him. The word bi suggested that I liked girls in general and guys in general, this wasn’t true. "That’s the thing. I’ve always liked girls, but you’re the only guy I like or will ever like."
"So you’re straight except for me?"
"Yeah," I whispered, "I’m really glad I met you, because I would never have known what it was like to be with-"
"Oh, my God!" David cut me off, his hands flying up into his hair, he sounded like he was going to cry. "I’m such an idiot!" Opening his door quickly, he turned and stared at me with vehement anger. "Get out, Pierre."
I was taken back slightly, what had I done?
"Why?"
From head to toe he was trembling, I had never seen him so angry in the whole time I’d known him. If he didn‘t look so strangely adorable, his cheeks bright red with fury, then I would have been frightened of him. "Just. Get. Out."
"At least tell me what I’ve done."
He slammed the door shut and walked away from it, pacing in angry circles around his room and never stopping to look at me. "How could I have been so blind?" He asked to only himself, "I can’t do this Pierre, I won’t do this."
"David, calm down, I don’t understand you." I reached out and took hold of his upper arm gently, stopping him in his tracks and turning him to face me. "What’s wrong?"
Wrenching his arm free from my grasp, he looked up at me. His eyes were wide and glassy, full of tears. "You were experimenting, weren’t you?"
I frowned, "I don’t follow you."
"Oh God, Pierre, you know what I mean!" His voice had never been so loud, and his angry circles around me started up again, only going a lot faster this time. Every now and then he’d gesture out in front of himself as if it would help him put all the information in the right place. "You know what they say, guys go to college and experiment with another guy, just to see what it’s like. A one time thing."
Understanding what he meant now, I tried to say no, but he held out his hand out to silence me.
His voice was beginning to get high-pitched, coming out hysterical, he was almost laughing. "You just did it a year or two early. You kissed me just to see what it was like, it meant nothing to you, did it? I will not be your experiment, Pierre!"
Stopping abruptly, he flopped back down onto his bed. I knelt in front on him, placing my hand on his shoulder. I spoke quietly, worried that a louder tone would start him up again. "You’re not an experiment."
Shaking his head lightly, he tried to push my hand off, but I held my ground, "The word 'experiment' implies that I planned this. That I planned to come here and meet an awesome guy. That I expected to develop a full blown crush on him, get drunk and kiss him. I didn’t plan any of this, and I did not expect to…" My voice trailed off.
I hadn’t been facing him, but I felt the muscles in his shoulder tense and contract, telling me that he’d looked up at me, "You didn’t expect to what?"
"Fall for him." I shook my head at my own stupidity, "I mean you. I didn't expect to fall for you."
His eyes widened, more with understanding than shock, and his lips fell into a pout as he said "Oh."
"Yeah."
The knob on his door rattled loudly before the door itself was opened. Seb bustled in, walking around the entire room as if we weren‘t there, checking inside David's closet before huffing at finding no one in there. He turned on his heel, looking briefly relieved.
Then he frowned.
"I don't like either of you right now." David and I looked at one another, then towards Seb."You... you stupid... kissers!" he stuttered out angrily, his arms flying about.
"It's only money, Seb," David said quietly.
I looked at him, eyes narrowed, "You knew about the bet, huh?"
"Seb told me. How did you know?"
"Jeff told me."
A light chuckle escaped his lips, making my heart flutter quickly, I hadn't heard it in so long, I missed it. "Some friends we have."
Huffing loudly once more, Seb marched over to us, "I'm right here, you know! Fifty fucking dollars, I've lost!"
Rolling my eyes, I stood up, pulling David with me. I positioned him in front of Seb. "You're gay," I said.
Seb blanched, looking extremely offended, yet embarrassed. "No, I am not."
"Humour me."
"Okay," he looked more than confused, most likely mirroring David's expression, which I couldn't see as he had his head down and I was stood behind him. "I'm gay." Seb said reluctantly.
"You like boys."
"I like boys." He echoed obediently.
From behind, I pushed David's chin up, so Seb could see his face, but instead, he chose to glare over David's shoulder at me.
I sighed, speaking quietly, "Could you resist this?" I gestured with my free hand to the boy between us, "He's amazing in every way, beautiful and perfect. He actually cares about me, which is a rarity, and to be honest, Seb, I need him. He's my, fuck, I don't care if it's corny, he's my oxygen."
David gasped lightly, turning his head to look up at me with his mouth wide open. I swallowed before continuing. "It's like I was stuck in a vacuum all my life, and he helps me breathe now. If you were me, or if you were gay, how could you have not kissed him?"
Seb's eyes widened in shock, he spoke ruefully, "If I were gay, I guess I would have kissed him too."
I nodded in triumph, twisting David round and pulling him into my chest. His thin arms, the first things I noticed when I met him, lifted, wrapping tight around my body. He squeezed, as if scared to let go. Grinning into his hair, which to my relief, still smelled the same, I breathed in, filling my lungs with pure David and thinking to hell with real oxygen, this was all I needed.
Seb eyed us speculatively, his expression shifting from confusion, to regret, to understanding. He was able to see that we wouldn't have abstained from kissing one another.
"I'm sorry for getting mad at you guys." Tentatively patting David on the shoulder, he side-stepped round us and left, shutting door quietly.
"Do you mean it? Everything you said?" David whispered. His mouth was so close, that his breath felt moist against my skin through my shirt.
"Of course I do." I lifted my head, cocking it to the side, "I kind of wish I didn't say it to Seb first though."
"At least I got to hear it." He rubbed his cheek against my chest.
"David?"
He made a 'hmm' sound, sending vibrations into me.
"Would you like to be my boyfriend?" Okay, that sounded kind of weird coming from me, and the wording of it was overly sincere, but it still felt pretty damn good to say it finally.
He looked up, smiling angelically. "Yes, please."
Relief and exultation washed straight through me, and I let go of him. I took hold of either side his face and pulled him straight into me, crushing our lips together. The most incredible, natural feeling kiss ensued, and I was pretty sure that it'd take me a while to stop, I needed to savour every moment.
It was no longer David's mouth and my mouth, it was our kiss, the absolute least amount of layers that could possibly be between us. It was the one crazy, flawless thing that we could share, well, with my memory in tact anyway. It was as though I had floated up out of my body and was looking down at myself. If I had have been anyone else, I would have been painfully jealous of myself for being part of that kiss.
I thought: warmth, wet, movement.
I thought, with a joyful curse: Oh my, this is fucking perfection!
Better than anything a blurry recollection could conjure, better than any fantasy.
David took hold of my wrists, and pushed me back a little, panting heavily, inches away from my mouth. "Holy shit."
"Yeah?" I grinned.
"That was... wow." On the last word, his breath blew straight into my face and made my hair move a bit. A little flash-back from when we first met came to mind.
"It was... wow," I chuckled, "Nothing like I imagined it would be."
He nodded, looking away briefly before meeting my eyes again. "You gotta do that more often."
"I plan to." Gently taking hold of his shoulders, I pushed him back at held him at arms length, taking in, for the first time, his new appearance from such close proximity. "What all this about?"
"What's what about?"
"The hair and the eyes and the clothes." I pinched the shoulder of his shirt, pulled it up, and let it ping back into place. "It's so different."
He grinned wildly, "It's for you."
"Me?"
"Yeah." He shrugged. "I thought you'd be mad at me when you came back, and you always said how you liked how I stood out. So I figured the more I stood out the more you'd like me, and besides," he walked past me, stood on his bed, and back-handed one of his Green Day poster. "It looks good on Billie-Joe."
I raised one of my eyebrows in confusion, and walked to the end of his bed, where he was looking down at me. "I couldn't like you more right now, no matter what you look like, and besides, I don't find Billie-Joe that attractive."
Bending down so his eyes were on level with mine, David smirked, "Well, he's no Lara Croft."
I let out a loud gasp, "Who told you about that!?"
"You did!" He smiled so hard he got dimples, that was a first. "After we were done making out. You said I kiss better than you imagined Lara Croft would."
With the amount of blushing I'd been doing lately I might as well have had permanently red cheeks, I really did tell the truth when drunk. "I don't remember saying that, or even kissing you for that matter."
"Yeah, I know, Patrick is very informative." He sat down on his bed, back against the wall and legs straight out in front of himself. "Man, am I glad this is all fixed."
"You're glad? Jeez, I haven't worried for that long in my entire life."
He patted the spot next to him, silently asking me to sit, I complied. "Me neither actually." He laughed, and very conspicuously took my hand.
We smiled at one another.
"Who's your room-mate?" I asked. Me and my curiosity, popping up at the most random times.
"Don't have one." He looked at me, "You know Jeff's old one got expelled because he had sex with a guy on campus?"
"Yeah?"
"The other guy was my room-mate. I never got a new one." He pouted, pausing briefly to think, "It's a shame really, he was pretty hot."
I slapped him on the arm and pulled my hand away from him in mock anger. He just laughed and took it back, "I'm joking."
"I know. You must get lonely though, up here all by yourself." Something was telling me that he wouldn't be spending so many nights alone anymore. I grinned at that thought.
He shrugged with his face. "I don't care, more space for me."
I glanced at another table at the back of the room, covered in random hair products and brushes. "Yeah, because you're such a girl. You know, that's got me thinking. Are we gonna get thrown out for being together?"
David smiled evilly, twisting to face me directly, "No one has to know."
"Okay, but will it be okay to tell the guys though?"
"Of course, they won't rat us out, they know I'd kill them." The image of Seb being impaled with a sharpened hair-brush came to mind. Or Jeff, poisoned with hair-dye poured into his orange soda. "Don't worry, Pierre, we'll make it work," he promised, nodding, "We'll make it work."
Chapter: Nine
Rating: R overall, for language and whatnot.
Summary: "It's your own fault, son." My Dad had adopted the same tone as his wife. They were trying to be calm to piss me off. Boarding school was meant to piss me off.
Disclaimer: I have more chance of owning a flying monkey with horns, so don't worry.
Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight
I was the one gripping his wrist, but David led the way up to his room, dragging me along behind him. I knew where his room was, but had never stepped foot in there before, I didn’t even know who his room-mate was, he’d never mentioned it.
He pulled me down the hall, weaving effortlessly through some parts of the crowd, and walking straight through other groups, making them scatter. I couldn't tell if he was angry, upset or worried. Though, I was pretty certain that he wasn't angry, because when I almost tripped he did look back and ask if I was okay.
It seems that every single dorm room in that place was painted in the exact same way, all the furniture in the exact same places. David's walls were plastered with Green Day and No Doubt posters -"Gwen Stefani, the only girl I've ever found attractive," he had said- and there was a small table next to his bed, littered with books, all their spines lined and concave from repetitive reading. He’d already unpacked.
Walking forward, I stood in the exact centre of the room while he remained by the door, the optimum spot for someone planning to escape if things were to get out of hand. "What do you want?" he asked.
"I’d like to talk to you about what happened."
He stepped forward with slightly outstretched arms. "Well, If you’re gonna shout then just get it over with."
"I’m not gonna yell, I’m not angry with you at all," I reassured.
He raised one of his eyebrows, the same side of his mouth going with it, "What?"
"I’m not mad at you. Why? Did you think I was?"
He blushed, "Yeah."
"Why would I be mad at you?"
In front of him, there was a round rug that looked a lot like a target, starting out with a circle of dark blue in the middle, then rings of lighter blue surrounding it, he rolled the edge up with the toe of his shoe, "I got you drunk and kissed you."
I shook my head, "No, you didn’t. I got myself drunk then kissed you."
"And you regret it?"
Looking from left to right, as if searching for those signs of regret around me, I shrugged, "Not at all."
David’s eyes narrowed, the darkness of the eyeliner taking over the colour of his irises. I tried my hardest to read between the lines and see what was going on in his head. It was clear on his face though, he was confused with too much thinking. "You’re straight, Pierre."
"When did I ever say that I was? You naturally assumed that I was straight, I just chose not to agree or disagree."
It looked like I had him there. "Are you gay then?"
"Nope. I like girls, David. Well, not right now anyway, I like you more. But I’ve always preferred girls mostly, like, before I met you." The hole I was digging myself into was growing deeper and deeper with every word, so I shut up babbling.
David nodded in understanding, "So you’re bi?"
I bit my lip and looked away from him. The word bi suggested that I liked girls in general and guys in general, this wasn’t true. "That’s the thing. I’ve always liked girls, but you’re the only guy I like or will ever like."
"So you’re straight except for me?"
"Yeah," I whispered, "I’m really glad I met you, because I would never have known what it was like to be with-"
"Oh, my God!" David cut me off, his hands flying up into his hair, he sounded like he was going to cry. "I’m such an idiot!" Opening his door quickly, he turned and stared at me with vehement anger. "Get out, Pierre."
I was taken back slightly, what had I done?
"Why?"
From head to toe he was trembling, I had never seen him so angry in the whole time I’d known him. If he didn‘t look so strangely adorable, his cheeks bright red with fury, then I would have been frightened of him. "Just. Get. Out."
"At least tell me what I’ve done."
He slammed the door shut and walked away from it, pacing in angry circles around his room and never stopping to look at me. "How could I have been so blind?" He asked to only himself, "I can’t do this Pierre, I won’t do this."
"David, calm down, I don’t understand you." I reached out and took hold of his upper arm gently, stopping him in his tracks and turning him to face me. "What’s wrong?"
Wrenching his arm free from my grasp, he looked up at me. His eyes were wide and glassy, full of tears. "You were experimenting, weren’t you?"
I frowned, "I don’t follow you."
"Oh God, Pierre, you know what I mean!" His voice had never been so loud, and his angry circles around me started up again, only going a lot faster this time. Every now and then he’d gesture out in front of himself as if it would help him put all the information in the right place. "You know what they say, guys go to college and experiment with another guy, just to see what it’s like. A one time thing."
Understanding what he meant now, I tried to say no, but he held out his hand out to silence me.
His voice was beginning to get high-pitched, coming out hysterical, he was almost laughing. "You just did it a year or two early. You kissed me just to see what it was like, it meant nothing to you, did it? I will not be your experiment, Pierre!"
Stopping abruptly, he flopped back down onto his bed. I knelt in front on him, placing my hand on his shoulder. I spoke quietly, worried that a louder tone would start him up again. "You’re not an experiment."
Shaking his head lightly, he tried to push my hand off, but I held my ground, "The word 'experiment' implies that I planned this. That I planned to come here and meet an awesome guy. That I expected to develop a full blown crush on him, get drunk and kiss him. I didn’t plan any of this, and I did not expect to…" My voice trailed off.
I hadn’t been facing him, but I felt the muscles in his shoulder tense and contract, telling me that he’d looked up at me, "You didn’t expect to what?"
"Fall for him." I shook my head at my own stupidity, "I mean you. I didn't expect to fall for you."
His eyes widened, more with understanding than shock, and his lips fell into a pout as he said "Oh."
"Yeah."
The knob on his door rattled loudly before the door itself was opened. Seb bustled in, walking around the entire room as if we weren‘t there, checking inside David's closet before huffing at finding no one in there. He turned on his heel, looking briefly relieved.
Then he frowned.
"I don't like either of you right now." David and I looked at one another, then towards Seb."You... you stupid... kissers!" he stuttered out angrily, his arms flying about.
"It's only money, Seb," David said quietly.
I looked at him, eyes narrowed, "You knew about the bet, huh?"
"Seb told me. How did you know?"
"Jeff told me."
A light chuckle escaped his lips, making my heart flutter quickly, I hadn't heard it in so long, I missed it. "Some friends we have."
Huffing loudly once more, Seb marched over to us, "I'm right here, you know! Fifty fucking dollars, I've lost!"
Rolling my eyes, I stood up, pulling David with me. I positioned him in front of Seb. "You're gay," I said.
Seb blanched, looking extremely offended, yet embarrassed. "No, I am not."
"Humour me."
"Okay," he looked more than confused, most likely mirroring David's expression, which I couldn't see as he had his head down and I was stood behind him. "I'm gay." Seb said reluctantly.
"You like boys."
"I like boys." He echoed obediently.
From behind, I pushed David's chin up, so Seb could see his face, but instead, he chose to glare over David's shoulder at me.
I sighed, speaking quietly, "Could you resist this?" I gestured with my free hand to the boy between us, "He's amazing in every way, beautiful and perfect. He actually cares about me, which is a rarity, and to be honest, Seb, I need him. He's my, fuck, I don't care if it's corny, he's my oxygen."
David gasped lightly, turning his head to look up at me with his mouth wide open. I swallowed before continuing. "It's like I was stuck in a vacuum all my life, and he helps me breathe now. If you were me, or if you were gay, how could you have not kissed him?"
Seb's eyes widened in shock, he spoke ruefully, "If I were gay, I guess I would have kissed him too."
I nodded in triumph, twisting David round and pulling him into my chest. His thin arms, the first things I noticed when I met him, lifted, wrapping tight around my body. He squeezed, as if scared to let go. Grinning into his hair, which to my relief, still smelled the same, I breathed in, filling my lungs with pure David and thinking to hell with real oxygen, this was all I needed.
Seb eyed us speculatively, his expression shifting from confusion, to regret, to understanding. He was able to see that we wouldn't have abstained from kissing one another.
"I'm sorry for getting mad at you guys." Tentatively patting David on the shoulder, he side-stepped round us and left, shutting door quietly.
"Do you mean it? Everything you said?" David whispered. His mouth was so close, that his breath felt moist against my skin through my shirt.
"Of course I do." I lifted my head, cocking it to the side, "I kind of wish I didn't say it to Seb first though."
"At least I got to hear it." He rubbed his cheek against my chest.
"David?"
He made a 'hmm' sound, sending vibrations into me.
"Would you like to be my boyfriend?" Okay, that sounded kind of weird coming from me, and the wording of it was overly sincere, but it still felt pretty damn good to say it finally.
He looked up, smiling angelically. "Yes, please."
Relief and exultation washed straight through me, and I let go of him. I took hold of either side his face and pulled him straight into me, crushing our lips together. The most incredible, natural feeling kiss ensued, and I was pretty sure that it'd take me a while to stop, I needed to savour every moment.
It was no longer David's mouth and my mouth, it was our kiss, the absolute least amount of layers that could possibly be between us. It was the one crazy, flawless thing that we could share, well, with my memory in tact anyway. It was as though I had floated up out of my body and was looking down at myself. If I had have been anyone else, I would have been painfully jealous of myself for being part of that kiss.
I thought: warmth, wet, movement.
I thought, with a joyful curse: Oh my, this is fucking perfection!
Better than anything a blurry recollection could conjure, better than any fantasy.
David took hold of my wrists, and pushed me back a little, panting heavily, inches away from my mouth. "Holy shit."
"Yeah?" I grinned.
"That was... wow." On the last word, his breath blew straight into my face and made my hair move a bit. A little flash-back from when we first met came to mind.
"It was... wow," I chuckled, "Nothing like I imagined it would be."
He nodded, looking away briefly before meeting my eyes again. "You gotta do that more often."
"I plan to." Gently taking hold of his shoulders, I pushed him back at held him at arms length, taking in, for the first time, his new appearance from such close proximity. "What all this about?"
"What's what about?"
"The hair and the eyes and the clothes." I pinched the shoulder of his shirt, pulled it up, and let it ping back into place. "It's so different."
He grinned wildly, "It's for you."
"Me?"
"Yeah." He shrugged. "I thought you'd be mad at me when you came back, and you always said how you liked how I stood out. So I figured the more I stood out the more you'd like me, and besides," he walked past me, stood on his bed, and back-handed one of his Green Day poster. "It looks good on Billie-Joe."
I raised one of my eyebrows in confusion, and walked to the end of his bed, where he was looking down at me. "I couldn't like you more right now, no matter what you look like, and besides, I don't find Billie-Joe that attractive."
Bending down so his eyes were on level with mine, David smirked, "Well, he's no Lara Croft."
I let out a loud gasp, "Who told you about that!?"
"You did!" He smiled so hard he got dimples, that was a first. "After we were done making out. You said I kiss better than you imagined Lara Croft would."
With the amount of blushing I'd been doing lately I might as well have had permanently red cheeks, I really did tell the truth when drunk. "I don't remember saying that, or even kissing you for that matter."
"Yeah, I know, Patrick is very informative." He sat down on his bed, back against the wall and legs straight out in front of himself. "Man, am I glad this is all fixed."
"You're glad? Jeez, I haven't worried for that long in my entire life."
He patted the spot next to him, silently asking me to sit, I complied. "Me neither actually." He laughed, and very conspicuously took my hand.
We smiled at one another.
"Who's your room-mate?" I asked. Me and my curiosity, popping up at the most random times.
"Don't have one." He looked at me, "You know Jeff's old one got expelled because he had sex with a guy on campus?"
"Yeah?"
"The other guy was my room-mate. I never got a new one." He pouted, pausing briefly to think, "It's a shame really, he was pretty hot."
I slapped him on the arm and pulled my hand away from him in mock anger. He just laughed and took it back, "I'm joking."
"I know. You must get lonely though, up here all by yourself." Something was telling me that he wouldn't be spending so many nights alone anymore. I grinned at that thought.
He shrugged with his face. "I don't care, more space for me."
I glanced at another table at the back of the room, covered in random hair products and brushes. "Yeah, because you're such a girl. You know, that's got me thinking. Are we gonna get thrown out for being together?"
David smiled evilly, twisting to face me directly, "No one has to know."
"Okay, but will it be okay to tell the guys though?"
"Of course, they won't rat us out, they know I'd kill them." The image of Seb being impaled with a sharpened hair-brush came to mind. Or Jeff, poisoned with hair-dye poured into his orange soda. "Don't worry, Pierre, we'll make it work," he promised, nodding, "We'll make it work."