[Closed/Ongoing] In the night sky, we'll shine together, rush of light

[sixteenxseconds]

Who: Akanishi Jin (kakusanaide) and Kamenashi Kazuya (sixteenxseconds)
Where: It starts at Kazuya's place. And then, you'll see.
When: 5:50PM
Why: Because the premiere of Transformer 2 is finally here.
Rating: PG-13? Idk. Can't predict the future, you know.

Comments

[kakusanaide]

The smile that etched across Kame's face made him smile automatically in return; he sank back onto his chair relaxingly as he listened to what Kame had to say. "I just had an extra ticket." he clarified sincerely. To be truthful, if it wasn't for Kame, he probably wouldn't go to the premiere despite the tickets - wasn't really a fan of the medias. But then again, he couldn't really tell Kame that. So he thought he'd keep it to himself.

When the wine came, Jin gladly took a sip out of the fine wine, smiling to himself at the taste. Ah, yes. This was the one that he had been meaning to try. There's a slight sweet taste to it, which came off as quite a surprise, but the whole drink was pleasant in itself. He was pleased.

Placing the wine glass back down, Jin looked up at Kame, his eyes studying. "You know, as much as I'd like to avoid this..." he begun, an arm on the table, his fingers hovering over his own lips and chin. "I think we both know that we have things to resolve." His eyes looked at Kame's deeply, looking for any reactions from the person who used to be his junior.

[sixteenxseconds]

The moment Jin began about resolving their issues, he glanced downwards at the table avoiding Jin's deep gaze, knowing that they had to. He nodded slowly. "I know." he said, though he'd rather much leave everything behind. But then again, ignoring unresolved issues would only bring more problems later, he figured.

He sighed and looked up to meet Jin's eyes again, determined to talk it out. "Where do you want to start?"

[kakusanaide]

Eyes flicked up at the response, and Jin moved to lean back into his own seat, an arm flung over the headrest. He picked up his glass and took another sip. "From you." Jin said in earnest, not peeling his gaze even once from the man before him. "You can say whatever you want. Ask me, tell me, why, what. Anything that you're not pleased with. Anything that you're mad at. Tell me everything. And I'll answer them all." Even as he sipped his drink, he looked at Kame through the rim of his glass, seriousness seemed very afloat in the air.

This was probably going to take a while. But so will their food.

[sixteenxseconds]

Kame bit his lower lip, hands playing with the napkin as he pondered on what to ask. It was not like he had no idea what to ask, he just didn't know which question to ask. Ever since Jin left high school, so many unanswered questions lingered in his mind for so long that it was still a wonder he never became insane because of it. He took a deep breath and picked up his wine glass to take a sip of it.

"What made you leave?" he asked, now looking into Jin's eyes.

[kakusanaide]

He should've expected the question. He did. But despite that, he was still taken aback at it. The fact that he finally heard it from Kame himself, probably had caught him off guard. Damn it. All his words seemed to flew off the window. At this rate, he might actually say something that could blow his cover. Jin placed the glass back on the table, and took a deep breath. "Parents. My dad got moved up to a different post." he said, almost nonchalantly. It wasn't the whole truth, but it wasn't a lie, either.

A silent glance at the other, and Jin felt like he needed to say something more. His words were insufficient, weren't they? "And I...I never got the chance to say I'm sorry. I'm sorry..." Jin paused for a while before continuing. "I'm sorry, Kazuya."

[sixteenxseconds]

Kame felt like he wasn't completely pleased with Jin's answer to his question - was that really all? - but he kept silent, eyes on the napkin he was playing with. What to say, what to say. It seemed that he didn't need to think about that for too long, because Jin spoke up again, and he only looked up when he heard 'sorry'. He felt tears welling up in his eyes, but he fought them back, biting his lower lip. "Why?" he asked, his voice almost a whisper. "Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?"

[kakusanaide]

The sight before him was enough to make his heart drop; even though the other was trying so hard to hide it, Jin could see the vulnerability in his eyes, and that made his heart throb. For a moment there, he could see the person that used to be his junior, the honest, fragile Kamenashi. There was no more hiding behind the wall of ego, no more playing under the mask of fake pretence. For a moment, it was just them and their old high school selves.

"I...I couldn't." No, of course not. He couldn't tell that he was supposed to move away a long time ago, but he was stalling his parents' move just because he didn't want to leave his old school. He couldn't tell that, the night after they did that, he finally said 'yes' to his father's decision to move away. He couldn't tell that he was actually running away from the night's revelation; that he decided to leave when he realized that he was falling for Kame. That he left, because of Kame. "I'm sorry. The move was too abrupt. I didn't get to tell you." His own calm voice surprised even himself, and he was grateful for it.

[sixteenxseconds]

Kame looked downwards, his gaze fixed on his hands again, still trying his hardest to not let the tears fall. They were at a restaurant, and besides, he never liked showing his tears in front of someone else. But just thinking about the past brought heavy emotions up again, and it was like he was back to being the little Kame that lost Jin. The little boy who lost his everything. "You could've left a note, at least. Or you could've written a letter." he mumbled in a low voice, not noticing a tear escaped until it fell on his arm. Quickly, he wiped the trail on his cheek away and put up a fake smile to hide his true emotion. "You know, I've always wondered. You didn't talk to me after we did.. it, and even left. It doesn't have anything to do with that? Or is it just a coincidence that you had to move afterwards?"

[kakusanaide]

"It's..." Jin tried to say something to refute, but words seemed to die in his throat. He couldn't say it; Kame's words had hit the bull's eyes, and it stabbed his heart, knowing that it was the truth. "It's..." Jin tried again, his fingers running across his jaw in an almost massaging manner. "It has got nothing to do with it." His eyes raised to look at Kame's. Confident. "Nothing." If he were to tell and spill the bean now, then there would be no point in all those running, wouldn't there? He couldn't say it. Not now. Not even now. Not ever. Not when all he knew was that his feelings were going to waste.

Taking a deep breath, Jin pretended to fix his cutleries and then picked up the glass of wine again, raising it slightly above the table. He swirled the dark red liquid around in his glass. "I guess I was too busy cleaning up." He left out the part that he tried to write letters - many times, he tried - but in the end, they all went into the dustbin, except for one. One that he had hid somewhere in his old house. If he told Kame now, would that make him seem weak? He bet it would.

[sixteenxseconds]

There was a small moment of relief when Jin said it had nothing to do with it, and he let out a small sigh, somewhat glad. All those years he'd thought that Jin leaving high school had to do with him. At one point, he even blamed himself for ever agreeing to do it.

"Oh." So he was too busy for him? Cleaning up was more important than him? "I see." he said, not daring to look up to meet Jin's eyes. His own eyes were so weak compared to the other's. He himself was weak compared to Jin. "If you'll excuse me for a moment." his voice trembled, and he stood up to go to the restroom, taking his steps in a calm manner even though he wanted nothing more than to make a run for it. Tears were falling down uncontrollably, and he frowned while wiping them away as quickly as he could while searching for the restroom - he didn't want to ask someone in this condition - and when he finally did, he stepped inside and rushed to the nearest sink to wash his face.

Stop crying. It's all in the past.

[kakusanaide]

It was probably his own imagination, but he could almost hear the tremble in Kame's voice, the small vibration in his words. He wasn't exactly the analytical type, but judging from Kame's words and actions, Jin had a feeling that the other wasn't going to the toilet to do the usual thing. Logically thinking, in this sort of conversation, would anyone even have the feeling to go to the toilet? He frowned slightly at the thought. Perhaps he could be thinking too much.

Deciding to just stay (he respected Kame's privacy as much as he did his) Jin sat there, silently glancing around the restaurant while taking a sip now and then from his glass of wine. Out of coincidence, he noticed a waiter peeking at their table, and that piqued Jin's interest. He kept watching for a while - totally forgetting the fact that Kame still hadn't returned - his fingers tapping slowly on the edge of his table.

[sixteenxseconds]

He glanced at his own reflection in the mirror, feeling rather pathetic for letting his emotions get the best of him. Here he was, crying like an idiot over something that happened years ago. It was time to let go of it. Why was it so hard? He wished he was stronger than this. A lot stronger. Jin was able to keep his calm (so it seemed) so why couldn't he?

Grabbing a napkin, he wiped his face from any trails of wet, hoping that it would seem as if nothing was wrong with him despite the bit of red eyes. But those were barely noticable, he thought. Besides, if he'd just smile enough, then he'd be safe.

He sighed. Now that he got the answers he'd always wanted, it was time to move on, right?

You're not alone anymore. You do not live at that orphanage anymore. Those times are over. You have it better now. Right. And with those last thoughts, he exited the restroom to go back to the table, calmly taking a seat. Looking up at Jin, he smiled - a fake one - and placed his arms on the table to lean on. "So, do you want to hear anything from me? Because I think I got the answers I wanted."

[kakusanaide]

His attention was diverted away when he saw a figure slipping into the seat in front of him, and Jin looked up to acknowledge the other's presence. Out of instinct, his eyes moved to study Kame, lingering unusually long on his face, before glancing down at the rest and then finally averting his gaze back to the table. He could feel something was wrong, suspicion arousing in his gut. But with what's going on right now, did he even have the right to be caring about Kame? Raising a hand, Jin motioned with two fingers for the waiter to come in and bring their orders, now that Kame had returned to the table.

At the question thrown at him, Jin glanced up from his dish, an eyebrow raised. Anything he wanted to hear from Kame? "Yeah." He looked back down at his food, all the while cutting up the steak nicely and taking a bite out of a piece. "That's all?" Despite his effort of trying to ignore his gut instincts, Jin still found it disturbing, especially now that he realized the lighting of the restaurant was making Kame's eyes looking a little bit puffy. Was it just his imagination?

Huh. And they say ignorance could be a bliss. This was anything but that.

[sixteenxseconds]

As soon as their orders were placed on the table, and the waiter left, Kame picked up his fork and was about to start on his fettuccine alfredo, but Jin's question made him pause his action. "I-" What caused Jin to ask that? Could it be that he failed to hide the fact that he'd cried a moment ago? "Yes, that's--" He sighed. No, that's not all. But he just wanted to forget about the whole thing already. That would seem like.. running away, wouldn't it?

"Was I important to you, back then?" The answer was obvious to him back during high school, but with everything that happened afterwards, he was doubting it. Ever since Jin had left him, he thought that the other had only used him to get what he wanted. The thought alone was horrible.

[kakusanaide]

The question caused Jin to freeze up, the only apparent movement being the finger that was slowly thumbing across his knife holder. Even his eyes were still on the plate; not widening nor blinking. There was a few seconds gap, and Jin finally raised his head then, joined along with the cluttering sound of steel meeting ceramic as he released the fork and knife unceremoniously onto the plate, the piece of steak that he was cutting was left half-cut. Incredulous couldn't even begin to describe it. What the hell was with this question? This felt worse than being dumped. Rejection, he could probably handle it but questioning his pure (considering he was pure at 16) feelings, that felt more like an insult to his ego.

Retorts were running through his mind like wild bullet trains, each filled with every single sarcasm and curses his mind could ever come up with. His jaw was working, seemingly trying to swallow the words back in before they could be spit out. Rationality, his brain was arguing (he was surprised it's working during dinner), and he knew he should keep it as the elder of the two, but hell. If Kame was asking him such irrational questions, why wasn't he allowed to throw it out of the window too? There's so many things that he wanted to say in reply, but instead, the only thing that came out, was just a simple, "Yeah. You were."

Oh, hey. That didn't come out too bad. Except for the obvious usage and emphasis on the past tense. Good job, Jin. Jeez. At least, he didn't say anything too bad that could fuel the flame. The last thing he wanted - he was sure of it - was to regret his accidental words and have Kame hating him.

[sixteenxseconds]

Kame glanced at his plate of food, trying to come up with a reply, but instead of words he only emitted a small hum. Sure, he was glad that it wasn't fake back then, but it made him a tad more confused. He frowned to himself, biting his lower lip as he stayed quiet for a moment, wanting to sort out his questions before he would throw another one that would insult Jin (or so it seemed, looking at his actions and reply).

"Did that stop at some point?" he asked, now looking up to meet Jin's eyes again. "Me being important? Because if I were important, the least you could've done was notify me of your leaving." He still didn't get it. "That you were too busy with cleaning just seems like a lame excuse." he finally admitted his thoughts instead of keeping quiet, the grip on his fork tightening a bit, feeling rather anxious. He wanted to be understandable, to be able to forget about all his doubts that he had in the past, and finally move on.