(no subject)

[puzzi]

I'm not getting along with my dad, and I don't want to call my mom because I know she will just sympathize with me and that's not what I need right now. I know that I'm being stupid about this whole thing but I'm not going to admit that to him. Because I don't do that. He said I came home acting strange which is due to many other things that happened last night. I wasn't in the best of moods, and arrving home to hear, "Boy, you look strange" sorta pushed me over the edge and here we are now. He thought I looked stoned lastnight. Which I wasn't. So I told him he was wrong and he just said, "okay" and smiled. Motherfucker. So I'm still upset but he isn't and that's the worst. I don't care about anything right now except what he thinks of me, and now he thinks I'm immature and spoiled. He thinks I'm taking all the bad qualities of my friends, and using them to form a new personality. He thinks I should go to Columbia University and take math in my senior year. He thinks I need to work harder in school and get straight A's. He thinks the only way I'll be happy is if I do well in school. And the thing is, he's probably right on that one. And I try to do well in school, but I'm so tired. I'm just so physically and mentally exhausted I can't. I haven't cried in so long, because I've been trying to contain myself. And now I think it's the only thing I can do to make myself feel better, but I can't do it.

I'm too tired. I have so.much.work to do.