gratitude interlude
Here I am in the U.S., about to head into a four-day weekend for Thanksgiving. The Canadian Thanksgiving has long since passed, but my sister and mother are actually coming down here to visit this weekend, so I find myself getting a little caught up in the excited “visiting with family” vibe that seems to be running rampant around here.
And then I read Shane’s journal, which has a lovely, poignant list of all the things he’s thankful for.
And then I read my sister’s journal, in which she stole his idea and made it her own.
So what the hell. Here’s my tribute to theft and thankfulness!
1. Well, the obvious thing, as I’m sure you can guess, is that I’m thankful for this baby. I’m thankful that he’s still alive and kicking, and for the excited anticipation I have about his arrival. Not having a child has been a palpable hole in our lives for quite some time. A hole we’ve been happily filling with furry animals, mind you, but a hole nonetheless. I’ve felt like a mom since I was eight years old when my sister was born. It’s a role that feels easy and right to me. So I’m thankful for this chance to sink much deeper into that experience. I can’t wait to learn from this child.
2. I’m thankful for my husband. He has been putting up with a lot lately, including whining, complaining, fussing and worrying. Occasional crying. Hot flashes and grumpiness. Lethargy and general obsessive-compulsive behaviour. He has cheerfully accompanied me on trips to maternity stores in search of enormous bras and fat-belly clothes. He has assured me everything is going to be fine. He has displayed little or no irritation at my incessant pestering about name choices. He has refrained from commenting about how fat I’m getting. He eats whatever I cook, even when the ingredients include a disproportionate amount of cheese. He is my rock. He will be a great dad.
3. I’m thankful for my sister, who has grown up to be smart, independent, sassy and cool. I’m really thankful for that. Imagine if she’d grown up to be intolerable like the rest of my family? Without her, I would feel very alone in the world.
4. I am thankful for the new friends I’ve made this year (both in real life, as they say, and online). I rarely make new friends, so this is quite an accomplishment. I feel grateful to have met so many smart, funny, delightful, caring people. And nearly every one is American! Shocking! It almost makes up for my post-election despair about the state of humanity.
5. I’m thankful for the two old friends I’ve reconnected with this year (one in real life, one online). I was delighted to discover that with each of them I resumed connection as though no time had passed at all. I love that.
6. I’m thankful to have found these two web sites (www.sorryeverybody.com and www.apologiesaccepted.com), both of which made me feel much better about the planet’s ability to get through the next four years without self-destructing. If you haven’t seen them, get thee hence post haste. It will bring a tear.
7. I am thankful that my mother is in a happy giddy space, one that seems to be lasting an unusually long time. And I’m thankful that my dad has not pissed me off in any significant way in recent history.
8. I am thankful for all my furry creatures, who bring me unmatched joy every single day. The way Lila plops her head on my lap whenever she wants a nose rub, and the way she bounds around the yard like she’s still a puppy. The way Pike drapes himself over my belly and purrs on the peanut and the way he talks to me in trills. The way Flay jumps on my shoulder every morning when I’m trying to brush my teeth, kneading and purring but also pinning his ears back in case I’m inclined to think that he’s actually enjoying the attention he’s demanding. The way Sophie cocks her head to the side when she hears a strange noise, and the way she washes her face with her paws, just how Pike taught her. The way they all live fully in each moment, and constantly remind me to try and do the same.
9. I am thankful that my job has not yet managed to completely suck my soul out. Since I’ve been doing this work for nearly ten years, I figure that bodes well for the future status of said soul. If I can’t quite muster thankfulness for the job itself, I can at least feel wholeheartedly grateful for the life opportunities it has given me. I kind of fell into this career path, and I’ve always felt vaguely uneasy about it, but it has certainly led me to some interesting places, introduced me to some fabulous people, filled me with confidence, and revealed talents I never knew I had. So that’s cool.
10. Finally, I’m thankful that Shane started this little idea, because it’s made me feel all warm and fuzzy and…. um…. thankful! Thanks Shane. You’re a nifty dude.