(no subject)
Comment to this entry, and I will give you 5 subjects/topics that I associate with you. Then you must elaborate on them.
1)waitressing
2)being gangster
3)drankin'
4)bird lover
5)big ole booty
1) Waitressing
So...being a waitress has really changed me as a person. I was forced to learn how to bullshit people and fake a smile and make it seem like I am happy. It also taught me that I hate dealing with people. I went to college to be a psychiatrist...but didn't want to hear people whine and complain ( or go to school for 10+ yrs.) Then wanted to go into nursing...but figured..if I can't stand hearing people whine about how much lemon is in their water then how am I going to stand hearing people complain about their health. Now I work on dead people. Medical stuff...check. No complaining...check. I do understand that I will eventually talk to families...but I love what I do and I have confidence that I can talk to them better if I love what I do.
2)Being gangster
Now...this isn't something you gain over time. This is something you are born with. I am pretty much the most gangster chick...ever. I get into fights and have a huge mouth. It is only when I drink ( we will get to that in a second) but I am still down. I always thought of myself as a pretty laid back person..but the more I think about it...I am a judgemental bitch who likes drama who has a big mouth. I instigate and people always seem to come to me with their problems knowing that drama will happen ( even if they say they don't like it...you know you do...you like the excitement.) People say I am full of life...but really..I am THE O.G. (ps..I was laughing the entire time typing this one.)
3) Drankin'
Well. My whole family drinks. They do it oddly though. My dad drinks every night and at dinner time pretends not to be drunk. The first time I came home completely hungover ( first time I ever blacked out..first hangover) my family laughed at me. I was 15. I recently went to jail for it and that was the last night I got into a fight with a boy. People have told me it is an issue but honestly it isn't. My problem is I go from extreme lows to extreme highs. If I am sad I go all out with it. If I am happy and drinking...I go all out with that too. Now don't get me wrong...I do love to drink and I do know my limits...but I have calmed down on it. It seems that is what I always talk about but really...that is when the interesting things happen. Otherwise I'd be talking about the things I study...
4) Bird lover
aww. Loving birds came from my mom. You see..my Oliver bird we got when he was a few days old. At that age he had no eye slits...no fuzz...no ear slits. He had nothing. We had to feed him non stop around the clock. At this time I was in 6th grade and my anxiety was paralyzing. I didn't know what was happening to me because I didn't have the concept of what panic attacks were and they were happening to me every night. I didn't try to actively kill myself but the only logical option to me at that point was to die. I would have rather died than to feel the terror I did every night for a year. It was very scary. When we got Oliver my mom had to stay up around the clock. Her and I would take shifts and it really eased me. It made me feel ok...which was hard to do. Oliver is my baby boy because I raised him and he really was a therapy for me. We have had many birds ( I am really good at naming parrots...the hook beaked birds.) They are more loving than any dog or cat I have ever had( minus roxy dog). Until this day Oliver still makes baby bird noises at me and lets me touch and hold him the way no other person can. My mom and I believe that Oliver saved our lives.
5) big ole booty
Seriously though. My ass isn't just big...it is black girl big. You know how black girls have like...tables for asses? That is me. It is not flat and flabby...it is pretty firm. It is just...HUGE! Every black person I have ever met tells me that I must have been fed Jiffy corn bread my whole life because that is not a white girl's ass. Funny thing...my mom makes jiffy cornbread all the time! My family has a history of many things...but the best one is the big firm ass. Finding jeans is bad sometimes because my waist fits...I just can't get my ass into it. I give a new meaning to ass cleavage. Anyone who knows me is used to it. Apple bottom jeans....they look phenomenal on me. My theory is that my boobs took so long to grow...so my ass just had to do all the growing. Now that my boobs are a good perky size my ass says " well fuck" and just gets bigger. Thanks ass.
1)waitressing
2)being gangster
3)drankin'
4)bird lover
5)big ole booty
1) Waitressing
So...being a waitress has really changed me as a person. I was forced to learn how to bullshit people and fake a smile and make it seem like I am happy. It also taught me that I hate dealing with people. I went to college to be a psychiatrist...but didn't want to hear people whine and complain ( or go to school for 10+ yrs.) Then wanted to go into nursing...but figured..if I can't stand hearing people whine about how much lemon is in their water then how am I going to stand hearing people complain about their health. Now I work on dead people. Medical stuff...check. No complaining...check. I do understand that I will eventually talk to families...but I love what I do and I have confidence that I can talk to them better if I love what I do.
2)Being gangster
Now...this isn't something you gain over time. This is something you are born with. I am pretty much the most gangster chick...ever. I get into fights and have a huge mouth. It is only when I drink ( we will get to that in a second) but I am still down. I always thought of myself as a pretty laid back person..but the more I think about it...I am a judgemental bitch who likes drama who has a big mouth. I instigate and people always seem to come to me with their problems knowing that drama will happen ( even if they say they don't like it...you know you do...you like the excitement.) People say I am full of life...but really..I am THE O.G. (ps..I was laughing the entire time typing this one.)
3) Drankin'
Well. My whole family drinks. They do it oddly though. My dad drinks every night and at dinner time pretends not to be drunk. The first time I came home completely hungover ( first time I ever blacked out..first hangover) my family laughed at me. I was 15. I recently went to jail for it and that was the last night I got into a fight with a boy. People have told me it is an issue but honestly it isn't. My problem is I go from extreme lows to extreme highs. If I am sad I go all out with it. If I am happy and drinking...I go all out with that too. Now don't get me wrong...I do love to drink and I do know my limits...but I have calmed down on it. It seems that is what I always talk about but really...that is when the interesting things happen. Otherwise I'd be talking about the things I study...
4) Bird lover
aww. Loving birds came from my mom. You see..my Oliver bird we got when he was a few days old. At that age he had no eye slits...no fuzz...no ear slits. He had nothing. We had to feed him non stop around the clock. At this time I was in 6th grade and my anxiety was paralyzing. I didn't know what was happening to me because I didn't have the concept of what panic attacks were and they were happening to me every night. I didn't try to actively kill myself but the only logical option to me at that point was to die. I would have rather died than to feel the terror I did every night for a year. It was very scary. When we got Oliver my mom had to stay up around the clock. Her and I would take shifts and it really eased me. It made me feel ok...which was hard to do. Oliver is my baby boy because I raised him and he really was a therapy for me. We have had many birds ( I am really good at naming parrots...the hook beaked birds.) They are more loving than any dog or cat I have ever had( minus roxy dog). Until this day Oliver still makes baby bird noises at me and lets me touch and hold him the way no other person can. My mom and I believe that Oliver saved our lives.
5) big ole booty
Seriously though. My ass isn't just big...it is black girl big. You know how black girls have like...tables for asses? That is me. It is not flat and flabby...it is pretty firm. It is just...HUGE! Every black person I have ever met tells me that I must have been fed Jiffy corn bread my whole life because that is not a white girl's ass. Funny thing...my mom makes jiffy cornbread all the time! My family has a history of many things...but the best one is the big firm ass. Finding jeans is bad sometimes because my waist fits...I just can't get my ass into it. I give a new meaning to ass cleavage. Anyone who knows me is used to it. Apple bottom jeans....they look phenomenal on me. My theory is that my boobs took so long to grow...so my ass just had to do all the growing. Now that my boobs are a good perky size my ass says " well fuck" and just gets bigger. Thanks ass.