whats your sign?
cracks me up good. read it!
Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22) - You have an inventive
mind and are
inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal.
You make the
same mistakes repeatedly because you are
stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fu.cking jerk.
Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) - You are a pioneer type
and think most
people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand,
impatient, and
full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone
you come in
contact with. You are a prick.
Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) - You have a wild
imagination and often
think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA.
You have minor
influence on your friends and people resent you for
flaunting your
power. You lack confidence and are a general
dipsh!t.
Taurus (April 23 - May 22) - You are practical and
persistent. You
have a dogged determination and work like hell.
Most people think
you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing
but a goddamned
communist.
Gemini (May 23 - June 22) - You are a quick and
intelligent thinker.
People like you because you are bisexual.
You are inclined to expect too much for too little.
This means you are a cheap bastard. Geminis are
notorious for thriving on incest.
Cancer (June 23 - July 22) - You are sympathetic
and understanding
of other peoples problems, which makes you a
sucker. You are
always putting things off. That is why you will
always be on
welfare and wont be worth a sh!t. Everyone in
prison is a Cancer.
Leo (July 23 - Aug 22) - You consider yourself a
born leader.
Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are
bullies. You are vain
and cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is
disgusting. Leo
people are thieving motherfu.ckers and enjoy
masturbation more than
sex.
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) - You are the logical type
and hate
disorder. Your sh!t-picking attitude is sickening to
your friends
and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and
often fall asleep
while fu.cking. Virgos make good bus drivers and
pimps.
Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22) - You are the artistic type
and have a
difficult time dealing with reality. Chances for
employment and
monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are
wh0res. All Libras die
of venereal disease.
Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) - You are the worst of
the lot. You are
shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You
shall achieve the
pinnacle of success because of your total lack of
ethics. You are
the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are
murdered.
Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22) - You are optimistic
and
enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely
on your luck
since you have no talent. You are a worthless
piece of sh!t.
Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22) - You are conservative
and afraid of
taking risks. You are basically chickensh!t. There
has never been
a Capricorn of any importance
Aquarius (Jan 23 - Feb 22) - You have an inventive
mind and are
inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal.
You make the
same mistakes repeatedly because you are
stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fu.cking jerk.
Pisces (Feb 23 - Mar 22) - You are a pioneer type
and think most
people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand,
impatient, and
full of advice. You do nothing but piss-off everyone
you come in
contact with. You are a prick.
Aries (Mar 23 - April 22) - You have a wild
imagination and often
think you are being followed by the FBI or CIA.
You have minor
influence on your friends and people resent you for
flaunting your
power. You lack confidence and are a general
dipsh!t.
Taurus (April 23 - May 22) - You are practical and
persistent. You
have a dogged determination and work like hell.
Most people think
you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing
but a goddamned
communist.
Gemini (May 23 - June 22) - You are a quick and
intelligent thinker.
People like you because you are bisexual.
You are inclined to expect too much for too little.
This means you are a cheap bastard. Geminis are
notorious for thriving on incest.
Cancer (June 23 - July 22) - You are sympathetic
and understanding
of other peoples problems, which makes you a
sucker. You are
always putting things off. That is why you will
always be on
welfare and wont be worth a sh!t. Everyone in
prison is a Cancer.
Leo (July 23 - Aug 22) - You consider yourself a
born leader.
Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are
bullies. You are vain
and cannot tolerate criticism. Your arrogance is
disgusting. Leo
people are thieving motherfu.ckers and enjoy
masturbation more than
sex.
Virgo (Aug 23 - Sept 22) - You are the logical type
and hate
disorder. Your sh!t-picking attitude is sickening to
your friends
and co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and
often fall asleep
while fu.cking. Virgos make good bus drivers and
pimps.
Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22) - You are the artistic type
and have a
difficult time dealing with reality. Chances for
employment and
monetary gain are nil. Most Libra women are
wh0res. All Libras die
of venereal disease.
Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 22) - You are the worst of
the lot. You are
shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You
shall achieve the
pinnacle of success because of your total lack of
ethics. You are
the perfect son-of-a-bitch. Most Scorpios are
murdered.
Sagittarius (Nov 23 - Dec 22) - You are optimistic
and
enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely
on your luck
since you have no talent. You are a worthless
piece of sh!t.
Capricorn (Dec 23 - Jan 22) - You are conservative
and afraid of
taking risks. You are basically chickensh!t. There
has never been
a Capricorn of any importance