I'll go with getlive.
Dear Kristy,
I don't really know how to tell you this, you're a leprechaun. I think I realized when when you smacked my ass- Outside of your office and I saw you Carve your initials into - My illegitimate child in Ghana. I'm sure you're open enough to understand That I get turned on only by garbage men.
I'm returning Our matching snoopy underwear to you but I'm keeping Your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I Hate your cooking and I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo.
Best of luck on the sex change,
Jaime
_______________________________________________________
Dear (choose a top friend)
I don’t really know how to tell you this but,(1). I think I realized (2)(3) and I saw you (4) (5). I’m sure your (6) enough to understand (7).
I’m returning (8) to you but ill keep (9) as a memory you should also know that(10) and (11)
(12)
(your name)
------------------------------------------------------
1.
Color of shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red- Our affair is over
White-I'm joining the convent
Black- Our romance is over
Green-Our socks don't match
Grey-Your a leprechaun
Yellow-I'm selling myself for candy
Pink-your nostrils are insulting
Brown-the mafia wants you
No shirt-you're mean
other-i dislike your eyelashes
2.
What is your birth month?
January-that night you picked your nose
February-when i quoted forrest gump
March-when your dwarf bit me
April-when i tripped on peanut butter
May-when i threw up in your sock drawer
June-when you put cuffs on me
July-when you smacked my ass
August-when i saw the purple monkey
September-last year when you peed your pants
october-when we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November- when your dog humped my leg
December-when i finally changed my underwear
3.
Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Lasagna- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken - In your closet
Kebabs - With Jean Chrétien
Fish - In my pajamas
Sandwiches- At the Elton John concert
Pizza - In a clown suit
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper
4.
What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over
5.
What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey - The Catholic Priest
Brown - The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red - My knee caps
Blue - Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink - My salt beef bucket
other - My prized statue of Michael Jackson in the nude
none - The elephant in the corner
6.
What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed
7.
What mood are you in?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed - That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exsist
Silly - That there is no solution to you being a dumbkid
Other - That your driving sucks
8.
What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black- Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your falseteeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Off white - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montanna underwear
9.
The first letter of your first name?
A/B - My virginity
C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbor’s dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards
10.
The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H - Hate your cooking
I/J - Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard
M/N - Always wanted to break your legs
O/P - Was interviewed about the car you stole
Q/R - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
Y/X - Will burn the evidence
11 .
What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink - I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda - I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water - I'm scratching my ass as you read this
Cider- I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice - You ruined my attempts at another world war
Mineral water - You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Hot chocolate - I love Oprah Winfrey
Whiskey - Your cucumber-fetishism is creepy
Beer - Thanks for the Cocaine
Other - you should stop picking your nose
12.
To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Best of luck on the sex change
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China - You make me sick
Germany - Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself
I don't really know how to tell you this, you're a leprechaun. I think I realized when when you smacked my ass- Outside of your office and I saw you Carve your initials into - My illegitimate child in Ghana. I'm sure you're open enough to understand That I get turned on only by garbage men.
I'm returning Our matching snoopy underwear to you but I'm keeping Your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I Hate your cooking and I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo.
Best of luck on the sex change,
Jaime
_______________________________________________________
Dear (choose a top friend)
I don’t really know how to tell you this but,(1). I think I realized (2)(3) and I saw you (4) (5). I’m sure your (6) enough to understand (7).
I’m returning (8) to you but ill keep (9) as a memory you should also know that(10) and (11)
(12)
(your name)
------------------------------------------------------
1.
Color of shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red- Our affair is over
White-I'm joining the convent
Black- Our romance is over
Green-Our socks don't match
Grey-Your a leprechaun
Yellow-I'm selling myself for candy
Pink-your nostrils are insulting
Brown-the mafia wants you
No shirt-you're mean
other-i dislike your eyelashes
2.
What is your birth month?
January-that night you picked your nose
February-when i quoted forrest gump
March-when your dwarf bit me
April-when i tripped on peanut butter
May-when i threw up in your sock drawer
June-when you put cuffs on me
July-when you smacked my ass
August-when i saw the purple monkey
September-last year when you peed your pants
october-when we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November- when your dog humped my leg
December-when i finally changed my underwear
3.
Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Lasagna- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad - As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken - In your closet
Kebabs - With Jean Chrétien
Fish - In my pajamas
Sandwiches- At the Elton John concert
Pizza - In a clown suit
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper
4.
What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over
5.
What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey - The Catholic Priest
Brown - The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red - My knee caps
Blue - Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink - My salt beef bucket
other - My prized statue of Michael Jackson in the nude
none - The elephant in the corner
6.
What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed
7.
What mood are you in?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed - That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exsist
Silly - That there is no solution to you being a dumbkid
Other - That your driving sucks
8.
What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black- Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your falseteeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Off white - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montanna underwear
9.
The first letter of your first name?
A/B - My virginity
C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbor’s dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X - Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards
10.
The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H - Hate your cooking
I/J - Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard
M/N - Always wanted to break your legs
O/P - Was interviewed about the car you stole
Q/R - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
Y/X - Will burn the evidence
11 .
What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink - I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda - I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water - I'm scratching my ass as you read this
Cider- I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice - You ruined my attempts at another world war
Mineral water - You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Hot chocolate - I love Oprah Winfrey
Whiskey - Your cucumber-fetishism is creepy
Beer - Thanks for the Cocaine
Other - you should stop picking your nose
12.
To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand - Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Best of luck on the sex change
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China - You make me sick
Germany - Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt - Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself