Exhibtionism, Again
This LJ thing and Dreamwidth thing isn't working out the way I intended. Writing in this format is fun, it's personal, it's familiar and I've been doing it for a while. It's been a very functional way for me to do what I do and learn how to write and be an exhibitionist. And I like you people who read this thing and give me advice and support and stuff. I've even gotten an amazing partner in crime and lover from LJ. The thing is I'm outgrowing this style of blogging. Also, people don't take this format seriously. Or maybe they do? I'm unsure if it's just me that automatically thinks of overemotional oversharing and teenage angst when Livejournal-type things are mentioned.
No, I'm pretty sure it's not just me.
But either way, I think I need to graduate. I'm still gonna post here, because shit of course I need a place to be able to post OMG GUYZ I'M SOOOOO WASTED AND KNOW WHUT? I HAAAAAATE MY EX/THIS ONE DUDE/YR FACE. And I'll need a place to get feedback from y'all and post personal shit that's all locked and stuff.
But I think I'm moving over to my almost secret blog about sexwork and shit. It's not just about sexwork, but that was what I was most into writing about when I started it, so there's a bunch of that up there. Some of it is exceptionally incriminating, some of it rather embarrassing, but since I'm losing my job at the Lusty and my other workplace has ceased to exist I figure I'm pretty okay. Especially considering I'm intending to take time away from the industry once we're done at the Lusty Lady.
I was considering taking down that blog (and re-creating it somewhere else) because I have an ex-client (who recently became an ex-client for certain) who reads it, but then thought better. I mean, who cares? He is generally very respectful and knows enough about my life to know we live in completely different worlds. If he starts being a problem because I'm rambling about blackmetal or my identity or something, well, that's his problem, not mine. Also, I'm tired of always compartmentalizing. Of carefully keeping separate the people and experiences that don't seem to fit together. In many situations, doing this is necessary and healthy. In the sex industry especially. But I'm not going to be a part of the industry soon, and whether or not it's a good idea I'm taking the opportunity to break down walls and be more honest and bring together parts of myself and my community that I have kept separate. I might be expecting too much, but I think my community is strong enough and caring enough to accept my wingnut ass.
And, lo, in one fell swoop I have fixed most of my problem with not having enough places to be an exhibitionist on the internet. Now all I have to do is fix that problem in real life.
Post edited to be public, because fuck it, why not?
No, I'm pretty sure it's not just me.
But either way, I think I need to graduate. I'm still gonna post here, because shit of course I need a place to be able to post OMG GUYZ I'M SOOOOO WASTED AND KNOW WHUT? I HAAAAAATE MY EX/THIS ONE DUDE/YR FACE. And I'll need a place to get feedback from y'all and post personal shit that's all locked and stuff.
But I think I'm moving over to my almost secret blog about sexwork and shit. It's not just about sexwork, but that was what I was most into writing about when I started it, so there's a bunch of that up there. Some of it is exceptionally incriminating, some of it rather embarrassing, but since I'm losing my job at the Lusty and my other workplace has ceased to exist I figure I'm pretty okay. Especially considering I'm intending to take time away from the industry once we're done at the Lusty Lady.
I was considering taking down that blog (and re-creating it somewhere else) because I have an ex-client (who recently became an ex-client for certain) who reads it, but then thought better. I mean, who cares? He is generally very respectful and knows enough about my life to know we live in completely different worlds. If he starts being a problem because I'm rambling about blackmetal or my identity or something, well, that's his problem, not mine. Also, I'm tired of always compartmentalizing. Of carefully keeping separate the people and experiences that don't seem to fit together. In many situations, doing this is necessary and healthy. In the sex industry especially. But I'm not going to be a part of the industry soon, and whether or not it's a good idea I'm taking the opportunity to break down walls and be more honest and bring together parts of myself and my community that I have kept separate. I might be expecting too much, but I think my community is strong enough and caring enough to accept my wingnut ass.
And, lo, in one fell swoop I have fixed most of my problem with not having enough places to be an exhibitionist on the internet. Now all I have to do is fix that problem in real life.
Post edited to be public, because fuck it, why not?