Self pity of the day
I'm tired of being called 'eccentric' (or variations thereof). People pretend it's an endearing term, but really it's just a way of reminding me that I don't belong and pressuring me to conform.
I'm tired of being outcast because I won't play the hypocritical 'Oh, BFF!' game to satisfy people's self-esteem.
I'm tired of being seen as 'cold' or 'hating' because I don't gush with pretend warmth.
I'm tired of being passed over and ignored because I'm too proud to be whiny and needy.
I'm tired of being looked at funny and made ashamed of my education, just because other people are a bunch of morons who'd rather watch reality TV and piss their lives away with their thumbs up their asses.
I'm tired of not being able to connect with people without hiding everything of who I am.
... Someone who's wise enough that when he talks, I listen said to me a little while back that I play the parts I play, and I play them so well, because deep down, I don't feel that the person who I am is worth anything or acceptable. I think it's just because I can count on one hand, with fingers left over, the number of people who haven't lost interest, ignored me, pushed me away, or set me on the fringes when I stopped playing stupid-ass games of pretend.
I don't want to pretend anymore.
I'm tired of being outcast because I won't play the hypocritical 'Oh, BFF!' game to satisfy people's self-esteem.
I'm tired of being seen as 'cold' or 'hating' because I don't gush with pretend warmth.
I'm tired of being passed over and ignored because I'm too proud to be whiny and needy.
I'm tired of being looked at funny and made ashamed of my education, just because other people are a bunch of morons who'd rather watch reality TV and piss their lives away with their thumbs up their asses.
I'm tired of not being able to connect with people without hiding everything of who I am.
... Someone who's wise enough that when he talks, I listen said to me a little while back that I play the parts I play, and I play them so well, because deep down, I don't feel that the person who I am is worth anything or acceptable. I think it's just because I can count on one hand, with fingers left over, the number of people who haven't lost interest, ignored me, pushed me away, or set me on the fringes when I stopped playing stupid-ass games of pretend.
I don't want to pretend anymore.