(Untitled)

[purpleyedemon]

Ok, so, I wrote another one. I'm not as thrilled with it as I was with the last one, but ya know. Enjoy :)

Title: All That I Ever Wanted
Word count: 1800ish
Pairing: Chris/Steve
Summary: It's been a year since Chris turned Steve's whole world upside down.
A/N: I don't own these guys, obviously. And the title, and bits of the dialogue are blatantly

Comments

[purpleyedemon]

I totally understand where you're coming from talking about a more vulnerable Chris and a whinier Steve who just needs to step up. And that's pretty much how I see them. Chris has all these walls, and this big, tough-guy, cowboy, Christian Fucking Kane image, but he's really just kinda shy and insecure. You can hear it in the songs that he had a hand in writing. And Steve is more emotional, but he has all these outlets and he's more well-adjusted, he'd just rather write and sing and pretend nothing's wrong than take care of the guy who needs it, but he's the one who everyone sympathizes with because he's so much more open about things (see, I'm not doing a great job explaining it, either, but I totally understand what you were trying to say).

I happen to have a soft spot for broken!Steve but I don't particularly care for a whole lot of heartbreaker!Chris, cuz it just feels so out of place in my mind, so...I mean, it worked in the last one I wrote, but I just couldn't do it again.

This fic really did just run away with me. Like I said, it started out as a 'Chris broke Steve' fic, but it stopped being that about halfway through. And that change was only partly a conscious decision. Mostly it just sort of happened, and I just kinda went with it. And yeah, that 'I don't know you' line. When I wrote it (in the middle of class lol) it was totally meant to be a legit Chris never let Steve in kind of thing. By the time I sat down at night to write the rest of it, though, the whole thing had changed, and that line turned into something very different, and it took on a whole new meaning.

[melodious329]

Actually I think you did a much better job explaining that than I did. Steve is actually better adjusted because he's more emotional. And you’re right, Christian is probably in more pain because he doesn’t have any healthy outlets and because hiding those emotions means he gets no comfort. I bet in the sequel all their friends are comforting Steve and leaving Christian to suffer alone.

I don’t have a soft spot for broken!Steve because I kinda want to give him a kick in the pants. Because he has all these healthy outlets and their friends’ sympathy, he should just put on his big girl panties and deal with it. All of that sympathy may have babied him too much.

Haha sometimes it’s fun when the story goes unexpected places. Even if it’s not how you meant that line, I kinda love it because it seems to really sum up what’s wrong with them as a couple. Frankly your own change from it's Christian's fault for not opening up to it's Steve's fault for walking away and immediately thinking the worst of Christian and not even trying to find out the real story, pretty much sums it up. I mean shouldn't Steve know Christian better than that?

Maybe it’s not really even about Christian moving to Nasheville, maybe it’s about Steve not seeing the real Christian, believing in Christian’s walls rather than the real Christian underneath and that’s why Steve walked away because he never pushes below the surface but only assumes that Christian is alright all the time no matter what happens.

[purpleyedemon]

I call it a 'soft spot' for broken!Steve, but it's really just a guilty pleasure. I don't sympathize with that kinda stuff with him most of the time. But for some reason, if they can make his brokenness believable without making me want to slap him, it just makes me die a little happy fangirl death for a few minutes. I don't really know why.

Yeah, I really like how you described Steve's guilt in the whole thing. But at the same time, shouldn't Christian know Steve well enough at that point to know that he wouldn't react well to just coming out with it like that and not trying to explain? I don't want just one of them to be at fault here, they both handled it badly, and they both just ran away when it didn't go the way they wanted it to. Though yeah, Steve should definitely have known Christian better, and should have stuck around long enough to find out what was really going on. That's kinda what I wanna focus on in the sequel. If I ever get around to writing it. lol

[melodious329]

I understand guilty pleasures. I have a thing for broken!Jensen in the same way. I don't know why I don't have that for Steve but maybe it's because I always think of Chris and Steve together and when they're together I like to see broken!Chris and responsible!Steve. Maybe if I could actually stand to read Steve with someone else...

Yeah, I agree that the blame should be shared, Christian didn't reach out to Steve after the misunderstanding. But I don't think I would blame Christian for not knowing Steve better because even if Christian knew that Steve is prone to these melancholic fits (I don't know what to call this...), I still think the average person wouldn't expect a loved one to just walk away from them, turning their back so to speak.

Also I think the way that you phrased their thoughts is interesting and may point the way for the sequel. Steve is maybe more blaming? Saying that Chris is an unfeeling bastard who always gets his way and no one knows the real Chris. Whereas Chris is more saying that Steve just walked away, Steve didn't care like Chris thinks maybe he's not worth caring about??

An idea for the sequel, because you know I just can't help myself, is that Chris is obviously running off to fix it, maybe thinking that it's his fault. So how does that change from just the 'Chris apologizes and Steve accepts and everything goes back to being great'? Because that doesn't fix how Steve feels he doesn't know Chris? So how to make it different, how to give Steve that epiphany that maybe he should be apologizing because Chris isn't his own stereotype? Sorry, I'll try to leave you to experience your own epiphany about what you want to write on