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*points to icon* First things first, look at the awesome new icon noapologyapathy made for me!!!
Ok, guys, so, to celebrate the new, much much better (and soooo purple!!!) comp that I got for Christmas, and my awesome new Chris/Steve icon, I've decided to post something that I wrote a while ago. I know that most of my flist doesn't really care about KANE fic, so very few people will actually read this until I convince myself to x-post this to a comm or two, but it's the first thing I've written in years that I haven't immediately trashed. So yeah...
Title: Don't Come Home
Word count: 1500ish
Pairing: Chris/Steve
Summary: Steve gets a late night voice mail.
A/N: I don't own these guys, obviously. And the title, and bits of the dialogue are blatantly ripped from KANE's song Don't Come Home. :)
“Mrmgph” Steve rolled over and reached for his phone, fully intending on turning the damn thing off and just going back to sleep. Who the hell would be calling him at 4am anyway? Like he’d actually answer. People knew him better than that.
It took until he had that evil little piece of plastic in his hand before he actually recognized the ringtone. “…Heaven above blessed me with your sweet love. I know I never tell you what you’re worth…” Fuck. Christian. God, Steve had spent weeks trying to build up the balls to call that bastard, and now Chris was just calling him? At 4 in the morning? It’s too fucking early for this shit. At least that’s what Steve told himself as he fumbled for the button to silence the song that had haunted his dreams for too long. I’ll deal with him when I can actually think.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Chris was laughing. That big, deep, throaty laugh that meant he was genuinely carefree and happy. The one that only a select few people have ever seen and heard. Steve could see the way his whole face crinkled with laughter, his head thrown back and his eyes closed. He could hear the slightly gravely sound to his voice that could only mean he’d been singing for just a little too long. At that moment it hit Steve that watching Chris laugh, knowing that he was the reason for it, had to be the best feeling in the world.
“Dude, when are you gonna just call him?” Jensen smacked Steve on the back of his head, pulling his thoughts back to the present.
“What?”
“Fucking call him already You’re not even here anymore. You’ve been off in space somewhere all day. Which means you’re thinking about him. The only time you ever space out on me is when you’re fantasizing about your knight in a shiny belt buckle. He’s an asshole. Yeah. But you miss him. A blind man could see that. Be the bigger man and fucking call his ass before I do it for you.” Gotta love Jen for that. Steve’s best friend always was the blunt one. It hurt sometimes, but anyone who had ever been on the receiving end of Jensen’s ‘sage advice’ knew that he was also usually right.
“He called me” Steve was still trying to catch up to the conversation. He felt like he’d missed something. That’s what I get for daydreaming, I guess…
“Whoa…you talked to him? And you didn’t tell me?” Yeah, Jen could also be a girl sometimes.
“He called me at 4 this morning. I didn’t answer.”
“Well, why the hell not? What’s wrong with you?” Why was Jensen getting so mad about this? Nosy bastard.
“Maybe because it was 4am? I was asleep. The last thing I needed was to try and deal with his shit when I wasn’t even awake.”
“Uhuh, and being tired was the only reason for not answering.” Steve hated that knowing look in Jensen’s eyes. So what if he was right? So what if Steve was just a little afraid to talk to the man who had broken his heart? The man he’d had to kick out of their own home? But before he could give his friend a piece of his mind, Jensen kept going. “Well, did he at least leave a voice mail or something?”
How the fuck does he do that? Sometimes Jen just knew Steve, and Chris, a little too well. That’s what you get when your ex’s best friend is also your best friend. Fuck.
“I think so. Haven’t listened to it yet.”
“Well, do it. I wanna know if the idiot finally decided to quit whining about how stupid he was and apologize already.”
He what now? Stupid? Apologize? Wait…has he been talking to Jen about this? That was just too much for Steve to process all at once.
“I-I haven’t had time.” Yeah, ‘cause that wasn’t a lame-ass excuse. Steve knew Jensen would see right through that one. But he had to say something, right?
“Uhuh. Just don’t keep putting it off. He’s blaming himself. Take advantage of it.” Oh, Steve had every intention of listening to that voice mail as soon as possible. Which would be, umm, sometime next year, maybe?
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Steve put his guitar down and ran his hand through his hair, for the tenth time in the past five minutes or so. He’d been stalling for hours now, just sitting on his couch with his guitar, trying to think about anything but Chris and that damn voice mail waiting for him in the phone next to him on the couch.
Maybe there won’t be anything to this damn voice mail. Maybe he just wanted to bitch at me for something. Or ask for more of his shit. Hell, maybe he just dialed the wrong number and didn’t hang up soon enough to avoid the voicemail. Why the hell should I be scared of a fucking message? He picked up the phone, flipped it open, and stared at the screen for what felt like weeks. Jen’ll kill me if I don’t do this. He closed the phone, sighed, and opened it again. Fuck it. He dialed his voice mail, and sat back to listen to the message.
“Steve?” Shit, one word and Steve started shaking. Just hearing Chris say his name shouldn’t do that to him. “Hey, man. Look, I ain’t gonna lie to you. I pretty much been drinkin’ here all night.” Yup. His words were slurred and Oklahoma was pretty much dripping from every word. Chris was definitely trashed. I guess he’d have to be to call me at 4 in the fucking morning. “An’ I been havin’ a pretty good time, too. Been partying with Jim, Jack, an’ Jose. So at least I’m not alone. Hehehe.” The drunk giggle. Chris must have been completely wasted if the drunk giggle was coming out. “But I guess that’s half the problem, isn’t it? I always brought all my shit home with me. Just got pissed, then got drunk, never talked to you about it. Yeah, that was real stupid.”
“Well, fuck.” Yup, Steve was plenty articulate at the moment. So, it took him getting smashed to figure that one out, huh? Steve had slid from slouching against the back of the couch to sitting on the floor propped up against the front of the couch, and having trouble just staying upright. And he was still shaking.
“Look, Man, I really just called to tell you that I was wrong, and that I was thinkin’ ‘bout you. I-I should probably leave you alone. I just…I just wanted to tell you that I know why you told me to leave. An’ I’m sorry.”
Wait…that’s it? It wasn’t so much that Steve had expected Chris to say more. Hell, he was shocked that Chris had even thought that much, let alone said any of it. He just didn’t want the message to end. He really wanted to listen to Chris’s voice for just a little bit longer.
“Oh” Apparently Chris wasn’t done. Thank fuck. “I heard you found somebody new. Bet he even listens to you like I sure as hell never did. That’s great, I guess. You…you deserve that.”
Wait…new guy? There definitely wasn’t anyone new in Steve’s life. “No. No way, man, you know better than that.” How could there be? Just because he couldn’t have Chris didn’t mean that he would ever be able to look at another person, guy or girl. Chris was all Steve had ever wanted, and Chris sure as hell knew that. Though his mind does have a way of makin’ shit up when he’s that drunk.
“God, I wish I was in your arms instead o’ talkin’ to this machine ‘bout all the things I didn’t do. Fuck, what else is new?” Silence. Steve thought Chris was done. Until he heard the five, barely spoken words that made the tears that had welled up in his eyes finally start to fall. “Still can’t believe you’re gone.”
Steve didn’t even hear what Christian’s next few words were. He had to put the phone down for a second to calm himself enough to stop crying. When he finally pulled himself together enough to be able to focus on the words coming from his phone again, it was just in time to hear Chris breathe out his last sentence. “C…can…can I come home?” And the message ended.
Before Steve even realized what he was doing, he was back up on the couch, speed dialing the number he’d learned by heart more than ten years before. It barely rang once before Steve heard the most amazing sound of his entire life. “Steve?” Chris didn’t sound like himself. He just sounded so broken. I should be mad at him…But…God, did I do that to him?
“Chris?”
“Steve, oh, god. I-I’m so sorry about last night. I was so drunk-
Steve interrupted before Chris started babbling. “Baby…come home.”
Man I totally just realized just how much cursing there is in this. Haha oh, well... *runs and hides*