Enough.
i glanced through my organizer and got a shock of my life yesterday evening. i just returned home, flopped myself on my bed and started crying.
never have i imagined myself faced with such immensed pressure from, school. mydeadlinestoeachprojectandtestisthisclose. i'm fearful. i'm afraid i wont meet my own expectations, and i'm afraid of my grades slipping, affecting my damn gpa. as much as 'grades should not be the main focus', it's just impossible to not let it have a strong foothold and motivation behind doing what i am doing. i can't describe it. it's this imaginery force pushing me to achieve more, achieve greater. i want to, but i'm tired and worned out. part of me wish i could sleep through the entire march & april. but it'll be running away. i want to face the giant. all i need is strength. all i need is strength.
sometimes i wish you could understand, more. be more empathetic rather than a surface concern like everyone gives to me. you position yourself more than that, so why cant you do the same in concern. i've tried hard to be understanding enough, and i'm drained. i dont have any more energy to fight and try and try and try. i tried. this is my basic need. and i need encouragement and support from people who are closest to me. i feel worst every time you cant be there when i need support. time and time again. i'm sick of being literal. it's just not meant to be like that in everything.
never have i imagined myself faced with such immensed pressure from, school. mydeadlinestoeachprojectandtestisthisclose. i'm fearful. i'm afraid i wont meet my own expectations, and i'm afraid of my grades slipping, affecting my damn gpa. as much as 'grades should not be the main focus', it's just impossible to not let it have a strong foothold and motivation behind doing what i am doing. i can't describe it. it's this imaginery force pushing me to achieve more, achieve greater. i want to, but i'm tired and worned out. part of me wish i could sleep through the entire march & april. but it'll be running away. i want to face the giant. all i need is strength. all i need is strength.
sometimes i wish you could understand, more. be more empathetic rather than a surface concern like everyone gives to me. you position yourself more than that, so why cant you do the same in concern. i've tried hard to be understanding enough, and i'm drained. i dont have any more energy to fight and try and try and try. i tried. this is my basic need. and i need encouragement and support from people who are closest to me. i feel worst every time you cant be there when i need support. time and time again. i'm sick of being literal. it's just not meant to be like that in everything.