This is very much influenced by my moods, more or less!planetzeroMay 3 2007, 10:46:38 UTC
I don't need to answer these anonomously... I have nothing to hide!
1. What is your favorite body part (of your own body)? My eyes and my feet
2. What is your favorite thing (not physically) about yourself? I'm very talented and I have alot of untapped potential in poetry, art/design, fashion design, creative and editorial writing and counselling.
3. What is your least favorite thing (not physically) about yourself? I'm too lazy and fucked up to do anything about making the most of my talents. I've had a series of knock backs I've never gotten over, people who have hurt me again and again has gotten me to the point where I can't even cry about it anymore, I just feel numb, and feeling like that makes it very hard to make new friends and open up to people at all because you think the world is just so fucked up and no one's going to turn around and love me for who I am.
4. Do you treat yourself the way you treat others? No. I tend to let others walk all over me and I treat myself like a 2nd class citizen. I treat others alot better than I treat myself.
5. What are your goals, of any sort, for this year? I want to leave my past behind me and find a new direction, do a short writing course, meet some new people, get over my post traumatic stress disorder and start feeling like I have a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
6. Favorite quote? 'What is this compared with eternity?' It means that one life is a speck, or anything that could be maken a big deal of... it is essentially meaningless considering the infinate vastness of meta-reality. We are all One.
7. In your opinion, what message is the media currently giving about weight and image? The media and the world is obsessed with being thin. They only do it because it's profitable to make people think there is something wrong with them and the world is driven by money.
That's all anyone cares about. They don't give a shit about the young girls who are starving themselves, all these people care about is how many dollars it's going to put in their pockets, fashion shows, entertainment, the diet industry, etc. It's giving the message that you can never be too thin or too rich, and to be both is extremely desirable and means you are a worthwhile human being.
8. Do you believe in that message? Why? I don't consciously believe it but I think subconsciously it contributes to how I feel about myself. I have never been able to understand where my desire to lose weight comes from, and I've never been able to rid myself of it completely. My mind is sick and my body appears healthy- this is very fustrating. I wish people could see how sick I feel and how crushed my spirit is.
9. Have you found your body image getting better or worse as you get older? Oh god, how do I answer this. My body image was horrible from the time I was 8 years old- I don't know what it's like to have a positive body image. I had a good body image on and off throughout my teens when I was at a lower weight I was actually pleased with my body. At healthy weights I tend to try to convince myself I have good body image but it doesn't matter how much I try to brainwash myself I just end up getting unhappier and more suicidal. Nothing works, I feel like I'm beyond help sometimes and I've tried everything.
10. Have you ever done anything that you think is so horrible, that you would never even tell a person online? No.
11. If so, what is it? (yes, time get it off your chest and stop feeling guilty!) N/A
12. List five things you want to do before you die.
TRAVEL! Europe, America, Singapore, Tibet, the Greek Islands, Malaysia, etc! Be in a relationship Become a famous and wealthy artist, designer and writer Become a professional astrologer/metaphysician Develop my psychic abilities and do readings
13. Do you truly love yourself? No. The only love I have for myself is conditional- it depends on whether or not I measure up to the standards I have for myself.
Re: This is very much influenced by my moods, more or less!planetzeroMay 3 2007, 10:48:31 UTC
14. Do you truly like yourself? I have potential. I haven't really done anything with my potential, I am yet to see something that justifies me liking myself.
15. Do you currently or have you ever obsessed over food/weight/body and/or engaged in eating disordered behaviors/thinking? Yes
16. If you had a choice of being medically obese and happy or medically emaciated and unhappy, which would you choose? Assume that both would give you the same lifespan. Medically emaciated and unhappy. Obesity would be like living in a furnace, and hell- especially since we live in such weight predjudiced times. Neither is desirable, but given the choice I'd prefer to be emaciated rather than obese. Obese people are viewed with disgust, and emaciated people are pitied. I would rather be pitied. Being obese would break my heart. It's not possible for me to concieve of being obese yet happy- maybe I lack imagination, but all I have are my own experiences and opinions to draw upon.
1. What is your favorite body part (of your own body)? My eyes and my feet
2. What is your favorite thing (not physically) about yourself? I'm very talented and I have alot of untapped potential in poetry, art/design, fashion design, creative and editorial writing and counselling.
3. What is your least favorite thing (not physically) about yourself? I'm too lazy and fucked up to do anything about making the most of my talents. I've had a series of knock backs I've never gotten over, people who have hurt me again and again has gotten me to the point where I can't even cry about it anymore, I just feel numb, and feeling like that makes it very hard to make new friends and open up to people at all because you think the world is just so fucked up and no one's going to turn around and love me for who I am.
4. Do you treat yourself the way you treat others? No. I tend to let others walk all over me and I treat myself like a 2nd class citizen. I treat others alot better than I treat myself.
5. What are your goals, of any sort, for this year? I want to leave my past behind me and find a new direction, do a short writing course, meet some new people, get over my post traumatic stress disorder and start feeling like I have a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
6. Favorite quote? 'What is this compared with eternity?' It means that one life is a speck, or anything that could be maken a big deal of... it is essentially meaningless considering the infinate vastness of meta-reality. We are all One.
7. In your opinion, what message is the media currently giving about weight and image? The media and the world is obsessed with being thin. They only do it because it's profitable to make people think there is something wrong with them and the world is driven by money.
That's all anyone cares about. They don't give a shit about the young girls who are starving themselves, all these people care about is how many dollars it's going to put in their pockets, fashion shows, entertainment, the diet industry, etc. It's giving the message that you can never be too thin or too rich, and to be both is extremely desirable and means you are a worthwhile human being.
8. Do you believe in that message? Why? I don't consciously believe it but I think subconsciously it contributes to how I feel about myself. I have never been able to understand where my desire to lose weight comes from, and I've never been able to rid myself of it completely. My mind is sick and my body appears healthy- this is very fustrating. I wish people could see how sick I feel and how crushed my spirit is.
9. Have you found your body image getting better or worse as you get older? Oh god, how do I answer this. My body image was horrible from the time I was 8 years old- I don't know what it's like to have a positive body image. I had a good body image on and off throughout my teens when I was at a lower weight I was actually pleased with my body. At healthy weights I tend to try to convince myself I have good body image but it doesn't matter how much I try to brainwash myself I just end up getting unhappier and more suicidal. Nothing works, I feel like I'm beyond help sometimes and I've tried everything.
10. Have you ever done anything that you think is so horrible, that you would never even tell a person online? No.
11. If so, what is it? (yes, time get it off your chest and stop feeling guilty!) N/A
12. List five things you want to do before you die.
TRAVEL! Europe, America, Singapore, Tibet, the Greek Islands, Malaysia, etc!
Be in a relationship
Become a famous and wealthy artist, designer and writer
Become a professional astrologer/metaphysician
Develop my psychic abilities and do readings
13. Do you truly love yourself? No. The only love I have for myself is conditional- it depends on whether or not I measure up to the standards I have for myself.
Reply
14. Do you truly like yourself? I have potential. I haven't really done anything with my potential, I am yet to see something that justifies me liking myself.
15. Do you currently or have you ever obsessed over food/weight/body and/or engaged in eating disordered behaviors/thinking? Yes
16. If you had a choice of being medically obese and happy or medically emaciated and unhappy, which would you choose? Assume that both would give you the same lifespan. Medically emaciated and unhappy. Obesity would be like living in a furnace, and hell- especially since we live in such weight predjudiced times. Neither is desirable, but given the choice I'd prefer to be emaciated rather than obese. Obese people are viewed with disgust, and emaciated people are pitied. I would rather be pitied. Being obese would break my heart. It's not possible for me to concieve of being obese yet happy- maybe I lack imagination, but all I have are my own experiences and opinions to draw upon.
Reply
Leave a comment