Life doing a 360 turn.
WOW...my life right now is a whirlwind of emotions...I have so many things coming at me from so many directions. School is as hectic as ever...my classes for once are trying to tire me down. I have so much work and not enough hours in the day to do all of it. I try to get ahead and then have something else get thrown my way.
Next, let's see my personal life...is one hell of a roller coaster ride this month.I am torn what to do in some senses and in others I know exactly what I should do. I have two guys in my life one here in P-Burgh and another in MA. The one here is an awesome guy...but it doesn't seem like it is going to turn into a serious relationship. Well I guess you have to define serious relationship...in some senses it has gotten serious...but I feel that what I am putting into it...isn't 100% and I hate the feeling of feeling empty..which I do right now. In addition this relationship would be a lot easier as he is right here. He and I have some things in common and both are interested in many of the same hobbies...but then comes the downfall he is only here until may and then graduates...grrr.
The other guy in MA, I have been talking to for over 3 years..I have pulled him into my drama and then pushed him away. He is one of my only friends that I can say ANYTHING too. He has been there when I really needed him and he has gone through many of the same circumstances. We are very compatiable...and I have very strong feelings for him. The thing is I would never get to see him. It has already been three years since I have seen him last we have been communicating threw e-mail and phone...so I dunno if it would be different in person?? I don't think so but I can't know for sure. I am torn and these last few days have been hell...I have told the one in MA that I would call him with my answer tonight...but as of right now I still am not sure!
I have some serious thinking to do! If anyone has any insight feel free to add a comment I could use a little guidance right now...I know the ultimate decision is mine...but I could use someone to talk to!!!
I will probably update this soon...but we will see what happens...I also have no time to do anything today I am going from 7am-11 tonight with a 2 hour break..damn all I need right now is a pillow and a friend!
Next, let's see my personal life...is one hell of a roller coaster ride this month.I am torn what to do in some senses and in others I know exactly what I should do. I have two guys in my life one here in P-Burgh and another in MA. The one here is an awesome guy...but it doesn't seem like it is going to turn into a serious relationship. Well I guess you have to define serious relationship...in some senses it has gotten serious...but I feel that what I am putting into it...isn't 100% and I hate the feeling of feeling empty..which I do right now. In addition this relationship would be a lot easier as he is right here. He and I have some things in common and both are interested in many of the same hobbies...but then comes the downfall he is only here until may and then graduates...grrr.
The other guy in MA, I have been talking to for over 3 years..I have pulled him into my drama and then pushed him away. He is one of my only friends that I can say ANYTHING too. He has been there when I really needed him and he has gone through many of the same circumstances. We are very compatiable...and I have very strong feelings for him. The thing is I would never get to see him. It has already been three years since I have seen him last we have been communicating threw e-mail and phone...so I dunno if it would be different in person?? I don't think so but I can't know for sure. I am torn and these last few days have been hell...I have told the one in MA that I would call him with my answer tonight...but as of right now I still am not sure!
I have some serious thinking to do! If anyone has any insight feel free to add a comment I could use a little guidance right now...I know the ultimate decision is mine...but I could use someone to talk to!!!
I will probably update this soon...but we will see what happens...I also have no time to do anything today I am going from 7am-11 tonight with a 2 hour break..damn all I need right now is a pillow and a friend!