[INCOMPLETE] Kakashi, Rangiku

[shouldve_didnt]

Who: Kakashi, Rangiku
When: Sometime after this post.
Where: Somewhere kinda north, at the river?
Rating: TBA
Warnings: TBA
Summary: Szayel messed Kakashi up, and he wants to die. Or drink himself into a stupor, which is why Rangiku's headed over to wherever he is. Maybe she'll find out what happened, maybe she won't. ^^

Comments

[shouldve_didnt]

Thinking a little more about his post, a wave of guilt washed over him. It would have been a lie to assure everyone that he was good and well, but he most certainly wasn't in his right mind once he'd been freed. While his small circle of friends must've been concerned about him before, he couldn't have eased their concerns by any degree. A part of him wanted to take that post back, but he didn't know if it was actually possible to get rid of it.

The shinigami was a sight for sore eyes--they weren't from the same world, but Rangiku never seemed to let him down. Ever since she'd first replied on his journal, it was like they'd hit it off pretty well. She was the first one he'd shown fireworks to five months ago and the first one he drank himself into a stupor with shortly afterward. She was laid-back, fun-loving, and a socialite, but she knew when to be solemn or serious.

In a way, Kakashi kind of wondered how he didn't wind up with her. Thinking about things now, he felt intensely committed to Rikku; if he didn't feel that way, would he have felt that for Rangiku? Then again, events in Purgatorium seemed to change him in some ways--he'd lost memories and wasn't the person who he used to be. Maybe the whole circumstance simply didn't promise commitment between the two of them; he didn't think he was feeling particularly committed to her, and it might've worked the other way around as well.

Feeling her gently lean against him there was a sudden sharp pain at first that was gone before he could react, and afterward he felt rather comfortable with her at his side despite a little pain from the light pressure. That silence, however long, felt all too short to him; bursts of feelings and thoughts pulsed into his mind... but he was pretty sure they weren't all his own. Were they hers, or other people's as well?

Taking the bottle into his hands, he took a good chug of the sake. Swallowing, he wiped at his mouth and gave a semi-refreshed but pleased sound. "You've never let me down, you know?"

He took another swig, taking more time to process it before giving a slow half-hearted smile. "I'm such a wreck... Not even sure what happened. Something tells me I'm in trouble, though. Can't imagine what mujan thinks after hearing something like that." Eyes that once focused on the sake bottle now stared blankly at the ground.

[dvinetitillatn]

Although her lips remained sealed, so to say, her eyes flickered, focusing their slate blue depths upon him. Considering everything that had happened to Rangiku, most of it her own doing, her mind was surprisingly blank. She knew that at times people thought that there was nothing up there but a slight breeze and perhaps tumbleweed. This time, they would be correct in assuming that, at least for the most part. It was strange, that solemn nature, quite unlike the bouncy chipper woman. Then again, she had her reasons for feeling thus; knowing that she had let Izuru down doing what she had done with Gin. Yet, they had talked, and Rangiku knew that they would talk more when Izuru got back. For now though, that numbness was what Rangiku wanted to keep, if even for a while, to deny those feelings that had been stirred.

The reaction of her body pressing against his told Rangiku that he was indeed not as well off as he might seem to be. Worry furrowed those thin eyebrows, wondering if perhaps she should not drag him off to see some doctor. The choice though was not hers. She had known Kakashi for a while now, had gotten to know him rather well actually. It had started off mainly as a curse from the Gods, though that friendship had remained and flourished even after the fact. He wasn't quite like anyone she knew, though she could see several people within him. In a way, he kind of reminded her of her captain, for he had that aura about him with was solid yet warm, as if you could trust in him. Yet, in the end, he was his own person, unique and individual.

An eyebrow was quirked at his admission, a slight pain within her eyes, but still a tender smile given to him. At least there was one person she had not let down. It seemed that recently that was all she had been doing, not knowing the recesses of her own heart. She let him continue to talk, not interrupting him, watching as he chugged back the sake, as if doing so would make all the troubles in the world vanish like ashes in the wind. Rangiku could have said it didn't do that, that the hurt and heartache would still remain, but, even knowing that and given the opportunity to go back and change her last few drunk days, she would have done the same thing.

She shifted then, moving to face him, one hand on her thigh, the other moving to brush against his cheek and cup his chin, tilting his face toward hers. Concern was within those depths of hers as she leaned forward, looking at him. "You're hurt, in more ways than one. I can't say I'm the best at healing kidou, but perhaps I can fix you up a bit, ne? That is, if you want me to?"

Rangiku would have understood though if he had simply wanted to keep his wounds.

[shouldve_didnt]

As the surge of feelings and thoughts faded away, he felt himself thinking surprisingly clearly. Unless that was the illusion caused by drinking sake--Rangiku did say that he never could hold very well against the drink. Perhaps that was the only illusion that sharingan never saw through. But it would be okay because he didn't want to see through it--he didn't really know how to deal with reality here and now. He was more than happy to postpone it, but then again... wasn't that why he was always too late?

Kakashi felt good being here with someone, even if she wasn't his mujan. Then again, it was probably better off that way. Rikku had scared him before; he'd caved in to jealousy and anxiety with the fear that she would leave him for good, didn't want him, had someone else... While that time she'd left was fairly long, perhaps his time away had been longer? Was he unfair and unjustified for being away that long and having no means to contact her? It wasn't like she left him a message when she'd disappeared, and she never really gave a proper explanation, either, but he owe her one? He felt like it. Kakashi didn't know what she'd thought or what happened while he was away, and his voice post had further disregarded it.

With that in mind, maybe drinking wasn't the best solution at a time when he should be gathering his bearings, but at the same token, Kakashi wished he didn't have to care. He was tired of the obligation. Tired, sore, and pained. He felt selfish--didn't he have a right to be at some point? And yet, he'd rather that he wasn't since he'd learned that being selfish could hurt those he truly cared for.

It was a vicious, unbroken cycle.

Feeling the pressure subside, he lifted his eyes from the ground to watch her move. Her touch felt firm but soft and caring on his unmasked face; his face, normally unexposed, was highly sensitive and tingled from contact with her lingering hand. His eyes met hers, studying her concerned gaze and trying to feel something beyond it but failing for the time being.

"I'd appreciate it. Worth a shot, I think."

He wasn't even sure how long ago he'd been turned loose. Most of the blood was dried but apparently not long enough to flake off in cakes or dust. A weathered and ripped off-white sweater loosely hung from his shoulders while tattered aged-white sweatpants sufficed to cover his legs. The whole of his clothing was spattered with dots of blood.

[dvinetitillatn]

Sometimes, you simply did need to avoid reality. Sometimes, a vacation was needed, an escape from the cycle. Whether it be through something one had done to themselves, or another, of if they were the one wronged, it was nice to revert back into that shell. Like a turtle, Rangiku had done that, stuffing her head into her shell an ignoring the world around her. By the looks of things, Kakashi could use an escape from hell to the sweet oblivion of a sake-induced paradise. His post had been confusing, and Rangiku had worried. Something had happened, and had the woman only put two and two together, she would have realized that the answer was Szayel.

She had thought so at the beginning, but then had brushed it away, yet clearly it was the case. He was an arrancar, though Rangiku was not sure she knew which one. Yet, had that one woman not been speaking about that? Octava? Though with the information given within Kakashi's post, Rangiku had not added up the numbers. While she might be quick on the draw in some situations, there were other times when she was not so much so. Hence why her and her Captain made a good team. Rangiku was intelligent, despite what people often believed, but more often than not it was a hunch that she went on. Call it female intuition.

She had remained, lightly holding his chin within her hand, afraid lest her grip come too harshly and thus make him give another hiss of pain. With his clothing the way it was, Rangiku was having a hard time knowing exactly what the extent of his damage was. He had walked here, had he not? Was that a good sign? Rangiku was not a healer like those found within the 4th Division. From early in the academy, those who showed that gift were taken away and trained to their full potential. Rangiku was lucky not to hurt herself worse if she tried to heal herself. She managed though, for the ones she did know, she knew well.

"Hai. Where does it hurt exactly?" She would never be a Unohana Retsu, though she didn't like to see her friends suffer, and this included Kakashi. She should at least be able to make some of the pain disappear, and the sake would do the rest, for now. She recalled his one student saying something about healing jutsu, and wondered why not her? It was his choice, and maybe there was a reason. Rangiku would not turn away from a friend, no matter what. Her hand dropped from his chin, and she waited. While she could poke and prod, reveal his skin and his hurts, she thought it better if he told her what exactly he wanted healed. A nail though brushed across the crimson markings on his clothes and inspected her finger, though it had not transferred over. Just how long had he suffered?

[shouldve_didnt]

A break in the cycle seemed to happen at least once a month; he'd be in a pile of stress (regardless of how laid-back he appeared) and wind up asking Rangiku if she had any alcohol of any sort. She was usually very willing to share, and they'd even drink together. Despite inconsistency, it was its own cycle within a larger one. But it was the one that brought them together, made them friends, and kept them empathizing with each other in the need to share a mind-numbing bottle.

Where does it hurt exactly? The problem with this question was that Kakashi didn't quite know exactly what hurt anymore. His mind still produced something of a dull throbbing, but when it came to his body, he didn't even know where to begin. Was the pain inside, or outside? Was it in any specific place, or was it everywhere? Nothing seemed concrete anymore; there wasn't just one answer to any question anymore.

"I'm not even sure... it's like everything hurts." he replied. "I can't even remember what happened or how I wound up this way."

Then he lifted his shirt--it didn't matter that it was pretty chilly outside. Besides, if he drank some more, he probably wouldn't feel it for very long, but it was important to stay awake and sober to take care of some details as soon as possible. Passing out could happen in good time, and he'd get his much needed rest at that point in time.

Meanwhile, he'd revealed a variety of gashes decorating his chest and stomach; they were all different shapes, sizes, directions, and stages of healing or infecting. On the front, there were two large marks that stood out--one horizontally on the flat of his stomach, and the other vertically from his right shoulder extending nearly into mid-chest. But those two were also the oldest marks.

Pointing at those specifically, Kakashi said, "I know where these two are from--got them when I was fighting Rikku during the commotion at ShinRa." Examining his injuries as if it was the first time, he continued, "And there should be another one from that time. A really large one on my back. Everything else..." He let that statement trail off; it was obvious enough that he wasn't sure how he'd gotten all the other injuries.

"I can move, but I'd rather not. Get the feeling that some things are broken, but I don't even know where anymore. And I had this pounding headache earlier--I'm hearing people's voices in my head, like people are shouting. That feeling comes and goes..."

[dvinetitillatn]

She regarded him with a concerned expression plastered across her face. She still rubbed that finger that had gently swabbed across the blood soaked fabric, as if trying to get rid of a spot that was not actually there to begin with. Just looking at him was actually pretty painful, and once more Rangiku realized just how strong these shinobi were where ever he came from. Humans seemed to have a way of doing that, for he was not dead like Rangiku, but more like Ichigo. Looking back, Ichigo and his company had changed her outlook, and living here only did it more so. Of course, the fireworks might have had something to do with it, for they had spent quite a while doing that, which, despite herself, was not something Rangiku would forget, though she probably also shouldn't talk about it either. Then again, it had been quite some time ago, before everything had changed, and she really did not feel back about that.

She did wonder if she had brought enough sake, but considering that she would allow him to do most of the drinking, she knew she had. He was a cute drunk, not needing to actually consume a lot to get him plastered, though he had not done the Izuru and the Hisagi either, which involved getting down into his underwear and singing. He probably could have, if Rangiku would have nudged him, but Kakashi's company those few times was enough for her, and she doubted he would have appreciated the finer details of her doing that. Now though, she awaited an answer, her worry growing by the second. When he finally did, a sad smile once more adorned her features. Whoever had done this, was an ass, and if Rangiku met that person, they'd get a punch in the face, if not something more.

"That bad, eh?" Rangiku whispered softly, as if speaking too loudly would somehow harm him. She cringed, watching as he pulled back his shirt, noting the scars, new and old, that decorated his body. It was no wonder he was as he was, Rangiku thought, for a person's body told much of how they lived. A patch-work of colours was his chest, and Rangiku huffed, clearing her mind. Using kidou took concentration, and that was not something Rangiku was well known for, not unless she put some effort into it. Sucking her bottom lip into her mouth, and nodding her head, she flexed her fingers.

"Ne, you don't need to move," Rangiku replied, yet she paused. Hearing people's voices? Surely that was something new, wasn't it? She had not exactly asked just what kind of shinobi powers he had, though he had learned from Sakon and Ukon that there were different types. There was that one pervert guy who blew things up with clay or something, and she had been told that the twins could melt together or something, but she had not heard of being able to read people's minds. Then again, why not? There were as many fish in the sea as stars in the sky, each unique and individual. "I'm not sure I can do anything about the head thing... I mean, I can try to soothe a headache, but... hearing people?"

She leaned forward then, a string of words muttered under her breath. It was weak when compared to what the fourth could do, but it was something, anything, that she could offer. Her hands pressed forth, gentle against his chest and stomach, lest she somehow hurt him more than she intended too. In fact, she was a bit annoyed with herself that she had leaned so against him, for he had not seemed quite this badly off, but clearly that was not the case. Although she continued to concentrate, her eyes flickered up, and she tried to draw his mind off of everything. "Oi, you better not be letting good sake go to waste, Hatake-san~ Or I'll give you a few kicks."

[shouldve_didnt]

Was it him, or was he picking up bits and pieces of her thoughts? Some kind of comparison between the living and the dead... in regards to strength... He was considering scratching his head or rubbing the back of his neck but felt a bit too lazy for either. Her touch was gentle as she laid her hands on his body; surrounded by the chilly air, her hands felt rather nice and warm. He quite liked it... While holding his shirt up with one hand, he took another sip from the bottle in the other.

"I won't waste any--PROMISE!" Other than drinking, he decided not to make any unnecessary movements. A brief silence washed over them as Kakashi heard parts of the shinigami's thoughts, including something about Sakon and Ukon. And it looked like Deidara was somewhere in there as well? "Hm, I didn't exactly hear these people before, though... Even I've never heard of a shinobi ability like this. Sharingan's got a lot of rumors about it, like what they say about it seeing the future. But that's more like cool stuff to threaten opponents with. I don't see how hearing people's gonna scare my enemies away..."

It did and didn't make sense at the same time. Must've been the sake setting in.

Whatever Rangiku was doing did have some kind of good effect; the shinobi felt even a little bit better. And his head was starting to feel oddly refreshed if not numb. But hey--numb was much better than pounding and splitting, was it not? Kakashi was trying not to take down too much, too quickly, and instead 'savored' the bitter liquid before swallowing, feeling a little burn as it went down. It was a good feeling, though, and seemed to make his mind feel that much clearer.

While Rangiku lessened the pain and the sake soothed his mind, neither could take away the tired feeling inside.

"Y'know... Thanks a lot, Matsumoto-san... I really appreciate it..."

He tried to keep his head on a little longer.

"Prolly should... head to the city, eh? N' find a place t'stay for a lil' while, rite?"