wonderful
well, everything is WONDERFUL for me, at least in the relationship sense...once i get a car in 2 weeks or so it's on to a better job, which should be easier with transportation, or well, something other then making my boyfriend go to bumfuck egypt. but it's i think it's a pretty fair trade, he's going to school right now so can't work, and i've got a job. so i don't feel so bad letting him drive because i can always give him gas money lol. he's such a good person, not many people would push themselfs as hard as he's doing with his school and family, and still want to be around me! lol...and let me add on, actually WANT (WANT!) to be around me every single day. and this is the first guy i've been with that hasn't tried to call me a bitch or a cheater or whatever the stupid accusations are, from people like that fucktard carter. oh wait did i just give a name? oh too bad... i always thought that what i had before was the best i could get (which was just horrible really), with him it's like every day is the first day we've met, and nothing ever gets old, i'm never bored, never annoyed. though we do bicker, which is just from my stubborness, and his tempter, it's never any serious effect, and 2 minutes later it's like it didn't even happen, it's just such a relief to know that if i voice my opinion i'm not going to get told to fuck off or something like that. i actually feel like i can be me, instead of someone else. and he doesn't boast about this or that, or what he has, doesn't make me feel belittled in anyway. which is a first, even if my regular friendships. what's it been now? 4 months we've been together? and it feels like i met him yesterday, but somehow have known him a lifetime all at once. just this feeling i get everyday when i look at the clock and count down the minutes till he'll walk in the door. i just can't breath sometimes, it's just undesricable, but it's definetly the best feeling i've ever had in my whole life with anyone. yes of course, everyone can think it won't last, but never in my mind not even once have i ever had a doubt since the day we've been together that this is the person for me. with everyone else there was always this wtf am i doing here? this isn't the best i can do, whatever it may be. there hasn't been any doubt in my mind or my heart, no hidden whispers in the back of my mind that it's not going to work (which honestly happens within a few days of meeting that person) i never thought i'd find my soulmate, my bestfriend, my lover, my everything...all in one amazing person. and i just wish he could understand how very thankful i am for everything he's done for me. "love" it's even a strong enough word to describe what i feel, no matter how many times, how loud, or how hard a try to say it, no word can match my love for this man <3