Good advice
I just received some excellent advice.
Let me back up. As many know I didn't start driving until over 2 years ago(gosh, has it been that long?). I put it off till ABSOLUTELY necessary because I was terrified of it. Mind-numbingly terrified. Now, 2 years later, I think I can safely say my fear of driving was at least half an actual FEAR of driving and half a fear of failing the dang test. And fail it I did, in unspectacular, sad, ways. But perseverance and necessity pushed me on and I got my license. Now, two years later I have spent a LOT of time driving in the dark, driven, by myself, for at least 2 1/2 hours to, somewhere I'd never been before, with Google maps my only guide, I've had my car die under me(transmission, battery, axel) I've gone in a ditch. But all of this is fine and I've recovered.
However, I am convinced I did not drive until I was absolutely ready to. Or at least as ready as I'd ever be and the weather was getting cold while waiting at the bus stop.
Now, a wonderful friend of mine will soon have a baby. A real, live, three dimensional baby. I can't describe how happy I am for her and her husband. (And I don't particularly CARE for children, but it'll be her kid, so I could I not love?!) But I felt very very weird.
I'm 25, single, living in apartment, student loans, and confused as to "Where on earth am I supposed to be?"
So I went to my roommate, who has lots of friends at various stages of marriage and baby-dome and asked her "Do you feel weird about this?" and she said "Listen, just because you have friends who are ready and at this stage in their life does not mean YOU have to be. This is just a check point for you. See where you are. See if you're happy and content. If you aren't, find ways to get TO happy. But don't feel like you NEED to be married and with child."
This is probably some of the best advice I've gotten on the subject. Thus, I am taking stock.
Things I am happy with:
My roommate and apartment location
My hair color
My shampoo and conditioner(you may laugh, but finding the right hair care products can be a challenge for just about anyone and if you're curious its Lush I Love Juicy shampoo and Garnier sleek and shine melting mask conditioner)
My slow but steady progress into professional theater
My friends and going out and partying (this is super fun, why didn't I do this more?)
My travel prospects (went to London 2 1/2 years ago and going to Germany in May and maybe a trip to D.C.)
My ability to see movies alone(I have discovered that the best time to do this is when miserable. Just go, cry, and come home and a few days later I will actually feel better. Its like a religious experience)
My church (and its music program!)
My family (still amusing)
My wardrobe and shoes
My sense of adventure and love of good food
My actual having of a job.
Things I'm working on:
Getting enough exercise (though, so far, since end of December/Begin of January I've actually gone to the Y at least 5 times a week)
Eating better (so far, less nachos, more salads, barely any soda, but chocolate and cheese appear to be my two big loves)
Dressing up on a consistent basis (so far I look like I care at least 3 days a week)
Improving my budgeting skills (math is HARD!)
Not holding grudges ( I've been working on THIS since I was in grade school...boy can I hold on to long term rage like no other...though I have improved...used to be I'd never forgive you...then it was 10 years...then 5...I figure by the time I'm 40 I'll actually be able to forgive someone within a year.)
The things I hope will improve because of the things I'm working on:
Dating.
Feeling better.
Having more money.
Getting more and better acting gigs
Being able to forgive more easily
See? I have a plan. I also know myself. There's no WAY I'm ready to be married right this very second. I'm ready to have a steady boyfriend with whom I would consider marriage in 2 years or so. That's what I'm ready for. Now, quicker goals...finding a pair of black character shoes. That's not really life changing, though.
-Caitlin
Let me back up. As many know I didn't start driving until over 2 years ago(gosh, has it been that long?). I put it off till ABSOLUTELY necessary because I was terrified of it. Mind-numbingly terrified. Now, 2 years later, I think I can safely say my fear of driving was at least half an actual FEAR of driving and half a fear of failing the dang test. And fail it I did, in unspectacular, sad, ways. But perseverance and necessity pushed me on and I got my license. Now, two years later I have spent a LOT of time driving in the dark, driven, by myself, for at least 2 1/2 hours to, somewhere I'd never been before, with Google maps my only guide, I've had my car die under me(transmission, battery, axel) I've gone in a ditch. But all of this is fine and I've recovered.
However, I am convinced I did not drive until I was absolutely ready to. Or at least as ready as I'd ever be and the weather was getting cold while waiting at the bus stop.
Now, a wonderful friend of mine will soon have a baby. A real, live, three dimensional baby. I can't describe how happy I am for her and her husband. (And I don't particularly CARE for children, but it'll be her kid, so I could I not love?!) But I felt very very weird.
I'm 25, single, living in apartment, student loans, and confused as to "Where on earth am I supposed to be?"
So I went to my roommate, who has lots of friends at various stages of marriage and baby-dome and asked her "Do you feel weird about this?" and she said "Listen, just because you have friends who are ready and at this stage in their life does not mean YOU have to be. This is just a check point for you. See where you are. See if you're happy and content. If you aren't, find ways to get TO happy. But don't feel like you NEED to be married and with child."
This is probably some of the best advice I've gotten on the subject. Thus, I am taking stock.
Things I am happy with:
My roommate and apartment location
My hair color
My shampoo and conditioner(you may laugh, but finding the right hair care products can be a challenge for just about anyone and if you're curious its Lush I Love Juicy shampoo and Garnier sleek and shine melting mask conditioner)
My slow but steady progress into professional theater
My friends and going out and partying (this is super fun, why didn't I do this more?)
My travel prospects (went to London 2 1/2 years ago and going to Germany in May and maybe a trip to D.C.)
My ability to see movies alone(I have discovered that the best time to do this is when miserable. Just go, cry, and come home and a few days later I will actually feel better. Its like a religious experience)
My church (and its music program!)
My family (still amusing)
My wardrobe and shoes
My sense of adventure and love of good food
My actual having of a job.
Things I'm working on:
Getting enough exercise (though, so far, since end of December/Begin of January I've actually gone to the Y at least 5 times a week)
Eating better (so far, less nachos, more salads, barely any soda, but chocolate and cheese appear to be my two big loves)
Dressing up on a consistent basis (so far I look like I care at least 3 days a week)
Improving my budgeting skills (math is HARD!)
Not holding grudges ( I've been working on THIS since I was in grade school...boy can I hold on to long term rage like no other...though I have improved...used to be I'd never forgive you...then it was 10 years...then 5...I figure by the time I'm 40 I'll actually be able to forgive someone within a year.)
The things I hope will improve because of the things I'm working on:
Dating.
Feeling better.
Having more money.
Getting more and better acting gigs
Being able to forgive more easily
See? I have a plan. I also know myself. There's no WAY I'm ready to be married right this very second. I'm ready to have a steady boyfriend with whom I would consider marriage in 2 years or so. That's what I'm ready for. Now, quicker goals...finding a pair of black character shoes. That's not really life changing, though.
-Caitlin