Small steps, giant leaps, and trains...
Saturday, 18th December...
As most of you are aware, that would have been the 3 year anniversary for Caroline and I, it's a day I'd been counting down to whilst we were together... a possible day of hope, and a day that since the breakup I'd been dreading, one that I could see as being a "break day", even with me reaching new levels of stability.
Turns out, overall, it's just a day, no different from the 17th or 19th.... all that can make it more than that, is my head... and there was no break, there was no angst, there was no traum...
in fact, it was a good day. Stayed over at Lizz's for an extra night as my body keeled over horribly from the abuse it had suffered, ended up staying up till about 3am talking, slept, got woken by a lovely coffee, got the train into waterloo, and then another train into work, worked like a bitch, sold loads of stuff, generally bounced around the store, resulting in a number of comments from my manager who was highly impressed at me and "pleased to see a smile" and glad to see me happy, I think perhaps this is the first time he had seen me so...
then dashed back to the flat, printed off a character sheet, and dashed to garou game, running even more horribly late than I normally do due to work finishing late, and trains being arses. Played some garou then on a random whim got the train back to Lizz's again, then trained back to work today, and am finally back at the flat after effectively three days away in an utterly random fashion.
Time away has been good, and done much for head, heart, soul and happiness. Finding that things change, both in actuality and in perception, is part of life, and change is not always a bad thing. Many things have changed in the last month, most in the last week or so, but thats how life is. The skies have been clear, the sun has been shining, it has been a good time.
There are still perhaps bumps in the road to come, but maybe they're to stop you from falling asleep at the wheel?
As most of you are aware, that would have been the 3 year anniversary for Caroline and I, it's a day I'd been counting down to whilst we were together... a possible day of hope, and a day that since the breakup I'd been dreading, one that I could see as being a "break day", even with me reaching new levels of stability.
Turns out, overall, it's just a day, no different from the 17th or 19th.... all that can make it more than that, is my head... and there was no break, there was no angst, there was no traum...
in fact, it was a good day. Stayed over at Lizz's for an extra night as my body keeled over horribly from the abuse it had suffered, ended up staying up till about 3am talking, slept, got woken by a lovely coffee, got the train into waterloo, and then another train into work, worked like a bitch, sold loads of stuff, generally bounced around the store, resulting in a number of comments from my manager who was highly impressed at me and "pleased to see a smile" and glad to see me happy, I think perhaps this is the first time he had seen me so...
then dashed back to the flat, printed off a character sheet, and dashed to garou game, running even more horribly late than I normally do due to work finishing late, and trains being arses. Played some garou then on a random whim got the train back to Lizz's again, then trained back to work today, and am finally back at the flat after effectively three days away in an utterly random fashion.
Time away has been good, and done much for head, heart, soul and happiness. Finding that things change, both in actuality and in perception, is part of life, and change is not always a bad thing. Many things have changed in the last month, most in the last week or so, but thats how life is. The skies have been clear, the sun has been shining, it has been a good time.
There are still perhaps bumps in the road to come, but maybe they're to stop you from falling asleep at the wheel?