Yes, Fight Back

Jun 20, 2009 09:52


There’s a lot of argument over whether people being attacked - especially women confronted with sexual assault - should fight their attackers.

Courtesy of The Straight Dope, here’s some data (emphasis mine):
  • A recent ten-year study of attacks on women (733 rapes, 1,278 sexual assaults, and 12,235 general assaults) found that on the one hand, resisting an attempted rape lowered the odds of the perp completing the act by nearly two-thirds. But on the other, it slightly increased the odds of injury and doubled the chance of serious injury.
  • A study of 3,206 assaults against women between 1992 and 1995 showed that women who fought back early in the attack were half as likely to be injured, and 75 percent of women queried reported that fighting back helped. An earlier study using data from the 70s found that women who resisted had less likelihood of being raped and 86 percent sustained no serious injury as a result - which, I suppose, means 14 percent did sustain serious injury.
  • Another ten-year study of victim response in 27,595 crimes (assault, sexual assault, robbery, larceny, and burglary) showed across the board that resisting resulted in less injury than not resisting. Similarly, studies have found that resisting reduces the likelihood of an attempted crime succeeding. For example, the chance of a would-be robber pulling it off drops somewhere between 20 and 48 percent.

…As to the “but you’re more likely to be injured!” argument that one can draw from these…yeah, you’ve gone from being a victim in an attack or rape, to being a party to a brawl.  Parties to brawls often get injured as a result.  But which would you rather be?

There’s another question this raises, for me anyway:  Is it more ethical not to fight back?  I have several friends and family members who are Quakers and the die-hard-pacifist types of Buddhist, so it’s a valid question.  My thoughts:
  • It makes sense to seek harmony with the Universe, and “yield to overcome” is awesome advice, because in harmony and nonaggression you are seeking to have the fewest possible opp0nents, which is the best way to have the fewest possible losses!  But that doesn’t mean that if someone makes you their opponent, you don’t treat them as such.
  • The point of kungfu as I study it is to cause as little harm as possible to be done, to everyone.  Your training is there to (for example) make it possible to break someone’s arm and run away, rather than having them rape or kill you.  My Sifu, a Shaolin Monk and one of the gentlest, kindest and most peaceful people I’ve ever met, says that he has never had to use his training to attack anyone, that defending has always been enough.  But he doesn’t go so far as to say that he wouldn’t attack someone, to prevent greater injury to himself or someone else (and I feel truly, truly badly for anybody that he *did* have to attack…OUCH).  Also, I believe him when he says that defense is often enough - if you’re attacking someone and they block you with a well-delivered, probably painful, move and return to a ready stance, that’s probably gonna talk you out of what you were thinking of doing, a good chunk of the time.
  • I would gladly have taken a beating rather than suffer the NotRape that I’ve experienced.  And so, I think, would everyone, if they knew the options.  Rape and its cousins are some of the worst things people can do to each other.
  • Lastly, the perpetrator pays for a crime in psychological suffering and karma, and often their punishment-even if it’s only “in their mind”-is worse than the victim’s, in the long run.  It’s no mercy to a person to let them go through with hurting someone else; and it is a mercy to prevent them, to at least give them another chance not to screw their life up that way.  (Apologies for the excessive use of the grammatically-incorrect “their” as a substitute for “him/her”…I’m just feeling lazy and neuter-gender.  ;)

More below, on protecting oneself, preventing assaults and kungfu.

I’m not studying kungfu so that I can fight, or protect myself.  I could do that before, and I’ve dissuaded numerous sexual assaults in my life with judicious use of pre-emptive attacks (hit ‘em before they expect you to, when they’re still “just talking”, and aim for something sensitive), weapons-at-hand (in a dark bar, order a bottled beer and don’t drink it - a full beer-bottle is damn handy), and most importantly, really loud verbal attacks.  In almost all cases, responding to anything over-the-line or sleazy with a high decibel “What the f*ck is your problem, a$$hole?!” tirade has been enough, and for that I’m grateful (and evangelical!).  But my experience when I was thirteen taught me that a little violence now can prevent a lot of violence later, and I’m a fan of preventing violence against everyone, including me.

Knowing how to fight off an attacker, especially of the common sexual-assault type,  is a LOT more about knowing how to size up your environment, how to use things and people that are around you, and how to make yourself psychologically unappealing (i.e. by being hostile or yelling) to a perpetrator.  Knowing how to deliver a punch, block one, etc. is useful, but by itself doesn’t do all that much for your odds.  Prevention and early dissuasion go a much longer way than a good snap-kick, IMO.

I’m not studying kungfu so that I can fight…  But would I use it to prevent myself or someone else from becoming a victim?

The answer is yes, except in case of a mugging.  Muggers are scared and often armed, and there’s an easy out - give them your stuff and let ‘em run.  (This is just urban wisdom, and while I don’t like that innocent people are often put in the “hand it over or get hurt” position, the truth is that nine times out of ten, you’ll be fine if you just hand it over, so yeah, that’s what I’d do…with the exception of my wedding ring.  That, I’d risk getting hurt over, because it’s a family heirloom.  And I don’t wear it if I’m going to a bad neighborhood, just for that reason.)

Anyway, enough babble.   I just wanted to have something here to answer the surprisingly common advice I hear, that women (and children, the elderly, etc.) should not fight attackers “so they don’t get hurt”.  People often give that advice, and then feel bad that they’ve just made you helpless, so they follow it with something like “you can protect yourself by not going to ‘dangerous places’ or ‘putting yourself in dangerous situations’”, which then leads all too easily into things like “well, why were you AT the bar, hmm?” and “good girls don’t do xyz”, all of which is victim-bashing and disgusting.  Women, children, and the elderly-and really everyone-should be safe and exercise common sense, but everyone needs to understand that that itself doesn’t mean you won’t get attacked in some way.  And if you do, be smart - don’t punch a guy with a gun - but also, speak up, and protect yourself.  Nothing makes me sadder than a victim who didn’t have to be, but for a little confidence.

Originally published at *Transcendental *Logic. You can comment here or there.

poly-ticks, kungfu yay, ethics, mo' betta consciousness, link fodder, science!, psychology

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