(no subject)
I just have been told for the millionth time this week that I suck at my job.
Aaron hung up on me today, and I have no idea why. (Honestly....this time, I don't know why he did)
I cried at work today, in front of more people than I ever wanted to.......ever......
I've been drinking sinse 2:30 this afternoon.
I'm crying/sobbing/bawling uncontrollably...to the point where my cats won't even come near me.
Today is one of the hugest emotional roller coasters I've ever been on.
I'm second guessing the best decision that I have ever made in my entire life.
I feel fat.
I feel ugly.
But I still don't hate myself, I hate how people treat me.......
I hate that I have such a heart, a concience.
I think I'm supposed to go to a Ryan Cabrera concert tonight.
I hate how I feel.
I hate you.
I hate you for making me feel like something that I'm not.
I am only inadequate because you don't want me to succeed.
_ _ _ _ it, I'm done.
I can't wait to go home. All I want to do is call my family. But I'm afraid they will be disappointed in me.