Applying for incredibly specific skill requirements job placement blues

[purchasemonkey]

   Sometimes I hate applying for work. Biotechnology job listing requirements are so ludicrously specific. I have eight years of experience in protein purification and column chromatography, for example, but not in running computer-controlled *H*PLC, only computer-controlled *F*PLC. The difference is minimal, but important. *H*PLC is a commonly-used analytical technique, while FPLC is a commonly-used production technique.

Can I learn to use any HPLC machine on the market in less than a week of training? Sure. Do I have experience with all manner of chromatography and a deep understanding of the issues, troubleshooting, principals, etc. involved? Check. Do I have technical writing, presentation, and collaboration skills? Of course. Can I get a job doing HPLC? No, I apparently cannot.

Grrrrrr.